Konstantina88P

Coventry , UK

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Wayward Lords

The story has very nice descripti0ns. You can picture everything vividly. However, there were a couple of things that made it hard to read. First of all, there were too many names mentioned (both people and places) in the prologue. I had to concentrate to realize and remember what is what and who is who and it pulled me out of the story. Also, you should consider breaking the paragraphs into smaller ones. I noticed that, in many places even as the story progressed, the descriptions go on and on and there's no much dialogue between them. To me, that was quite tiresome because I prefer the characters to interact more.
Other than that, the plot was really interesting. Keep up the good work!

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Cupid's heart

There are too many grammar errors that make the story hard to read and enjoy. You should consider editing it once or twice and then re-posting. Also, the plot moves too fast without explaining a lot of things. I'd suggest slowing it down a bit.

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The girl who lived in the shadow

An interesting mystery. The interconnection between the two girls, Hana and Monica, is nicely set up and very intriguing. Small town murder suspense that can unfold into a great story.

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Her alpha, his omega

I enjoyed this story, It was well written and edited. My only suggestion is to shorten the chapters as they can get tiresome. Keep up the good work!

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Good worldbuilding

I liked the worldbuilding at the beginning. I particularly enjoyed the little tidbits of greek mythology. It took me a while to get all the names straight, but as I kept reading it got easier. There weren't any noticeable grammar or punctuation errors. One thing I'd suggest is to separate your dialogue bits when 2 different characters speak.

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The King's demise

A very promising start, setting up the mystery background for the main character. A few sentences read stilted though, and the punctuation needs work (maybe check out grammarly). Keep up the good work!

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Sold to your king

Ok, first of all, the female protagonist, Freya, was all over the place. She started as a sweet, scared girl, and literally on the next page she fell in love with someone who she called an abuser in the same breath. Also, she's just as bad as him in the end, in a way that doesn't make her a strong character but a twisted one. Now, I don't mind dark, murderous characters, but it felt like there was no explanation at all for her transformation.

For the technical part, there were parts were you used the wrong words (eg wear instead of were) that could be fixed with a good edit. Consider using an online editor that would also help with punctuation (like grammarly).
Keep up the hard work!

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What lies inside

The story tries to set up a mystery but it feels like it fell short, mainly due to not vivid enough descriptions. Also, the author keeps mixing up the tenses, from present to past simple, which disturbs the reading flow. I'd suggest fixing those first of all.

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Beasts of men

While the plot was interesting, there were many technical problems with the story. The flow was confusing, jumping from one place to another and new names popping up without explanation. The punctuation at times was all over the place and a lot of sentences seemed to cut off abruptly. I'd suggest a hard edit and you should also consider an online editor (like grammarly) to help with punctuation.
Keep up the hard work!

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Unspoken love

I loved everything about this story, from the background info to the perfectly described darkness of each character. I definitely recommend it

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Aureum

The plot seems interesting but it's buried under quite a lot of technical errors. Most of the time, you don't understand who is talking. Punctuation is also missing from a lot of places. Furthermore, I'd suggest finding a way to incorporate your character's description into the story instead of writing a few lines about him in its own chapter.
Keep up the hard work!

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Interesting!

The plot is really interesting with a dynamic start. I was a bit confused with the timeline at first, with all the back and forth, but ok. Also, a lot of the sentences are too short, cutting abruptly. I'm not sure I like that style of writing, but in your case it made the story more tense which was nice.
A few grammatical errors, especially regarding the tenses you use, but nothing that a good edit can't fix.
Keep up the good work!

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My sister's wedding

The story has promise but I prefer to see the characters interacting more instead of just telling us about the relationships. Alexis' reaction also seemed a bit over the top, but that's just for my tastes. Good job!

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The enchantress and the demon dragon

I liked the descriptions in the story! The plot is promising, though I'd like to read more in order to have a full opinion. A few grammar mistakes that can be fixed with a good edit. Keep up the good work!

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The assassins' beast

The plot is interesting, though a little predictable as you can tell they're mates from the first chapters. I like a little bit more mystery to it! There are quite a few typos, grammar and punctuation errors that pull you out of the story sometimes. You should look into editing the story a bit more. All in all, an enjoyable read! Keep up the good work!

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The rising series

I love characters from Greek mythology and your spin is really interesting. The intricacies of the court make the story enjoyable. There are a few typos and punctuation mistakes that can be fixed with a good edit. I'm eagerly waiting for new chapters!

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The Scarlet Demon

The plot was interesting and the mythology and world-building pretty great. However, there are a lot of things that aren't sufficiently explained and make the plot confusing, hence the 4 stars. Keep up the good work!

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The curse of the white rose

The story has some really nice descriptions. The plot was like a fairytale that could be easily be a full-length novel, but the short story did it justice, too. Maybe I'd shorten some of the chapters as long chapters get tiresome, but that's just me.
Keep up the good work!

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The Eldian tales

The story has promise. Apart from separating your dialogue bits to their own paragraph, the way you divide your story into chapters needs work, too, as you change the chapter while the same scene plays out. The relationship between the two main characters should go deeper, as you have them behaving like brothers but there's no actual bonding happening.
Keep up the hard work!

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Good job!

A very realistic portrayal of the struggles of an orphaned girl. Your writing was nice and there were only a few typos. The end was too good to be true, but fit well with the hopeful image the story portrayed. Good job!

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Stranded in thoughts

The writing got confusing a lot of times. The pace was too slow for me, and there was no immediate connection between your opening chapter and the rest of the story. I also think you should provide a list of the foreign words you use and their meaning in English at the end of each chapter. I had to google some, like "Sinturon Ni Hudas."
Keep up the hard work!

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Split the deck

The character with the multiple personality disorder is very interesting. The writing, though, needs a little bit of refining since the story gets confusing some times. The plot is very promising! Keep up the good work!

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The girl who stopped time

One of the best stories I've read on inkitt. Unique plot, great world-building, and a strong female character. It needs a sequel!
A few grammar mistakes, though. You keep mixing up your-you're, were-we're, and to-too. Fix these up and your book will be awesome.

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Ray of sunshine

Some suggestions to the author:
1. The world building is a bit flat. You should consider enriching your descriptions.
2. Your chapters are too small and it doesn't make sense how you separate them. They don't move the plot forward.
3. A lot of punctuation and grammar mistakes. You should consider an online editor.

All these made it quite difficult to follow and enjoy the story. Perhaps a good edit can change all that.
Keep up the hard work!

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Nice plot!

I enjoyed reading this story. Plot wise, it was really interesting and it had many twists. You can't even decide who you want the love interest to be, yet. The only thing that I'd consider in need of fixing is the cousins that keep coming out of nowhere. It's like you invented them just to get the protagonist out of difficult situations, and then gave them a backstory as an afterthought. That's how I read it, anyway.
For the technical part, a few punctuation mistakes and some sentences which need shortening.
A lot of potential for this story!

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Interesting

The story has an interesting beginning, especially the one with the police station at the very first lines. There are a few grammar mistakes. One thing I suggest is to separate the dialogue bits. When different people speak, it shouldn't be in the same paragraph. Keep up the good work!

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Destined to the Alpha

The story started to turn good only halfway through. For the first half, I wasn't overly fond of how spineless Jade was when it came to Jordan. In general, I don't enjoy the books that have the characters just falling in love because of a mate bond without even knowing each other. It screams manipulation to me. That being said, when she started getting her own powers the story was nice. If you edit a few technical errors it'd be even better!

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Mr. Nerd

The story is promising and the double identity intriguing. There are a lot of technical mistakes, though, that make the chapters hard to read. For one thing, you should consider shortening your sentences instead of jumbling everything together. Your grammar needs a bit of work, too. Keep up the good work!

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Beautiful scars

The story was really interesting, with an intense romance and a good mystery. However, there are quite a few technical mistakes, especially grammar ones, that make the text kind of difficult to read, hence the 3 stars. With a good edit, the book could become great!

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Good story

The story starts with an interesting twist. Emotions are well described. Keep it up!

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Great!

The story has some really good descriptions. The world-building and the mythology behind it are pretty great, too. The pace quick and providing as much info as necessary to keep it interesting. I really enjoyed this!

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Blood love

I can't really judge your story's plot based on one chapter, but it seems interesting. Technically, you should give it a good edit since there are quite a few mistakes. Also, I suggest to shorten your sentences instead of overusing commas. Keep up the good work!

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Cassandra

I did not enjoy the plot of the story. All characters, Jan especially, were unlikable. Technically, it was good enough. I'd suggest to shorten your paragraphs and try not to use too much dialogue.

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North AMerican Werewolves

The story was okay, although it had a plot hole that put me off almost from the start. The romance between the protagonists was too abrupt. In fact, I wouldn't even call it romance, considering that they just announced to her that she's the king's mate while she had just learned about werewolves, and she just accepted that and they got together. Also, she was the chosen mate of one of his friends who just handed her over like a piece of meet. These two facts made it unable for me to read further, I'm afraid.

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Basterone

The story is really interesting and it starts with a kick that would hook me in if there weren't so many technical mistakes. Your words get jumbled up a lot and it's a bit confusing. With a good edit, the story could be great!

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Coming home to you

I liked the writing style a lot, but the end was a bit too cheesy for my tastes. The only other issues I found was a tense mix-up, where simple present turned to past present within the same paragraph. A couple of typos as well. Other than that, the whole experimenting thing and a strong female character were really interesting.

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Good dynamics

The dynamics between the characters hook you in right from the start. Great beginning and well written. Keep this up!

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No connection

Your plot is a bit confusing. You should consider defining the timeline a little bit better. Also, I didn't feel any connection between your protagonists. The female character especially was really unlikable. It just didn't make any sense, her obsession with Max. I'd suggest to strengthen their background and motivations.
A few technical errors as well.

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Sorry

I'm so sorry but I didn't manage to finish reading your uploaded chapters. There are severe issues with the English language that make the book unreadable and the plot chaotic. I didn't get what the plot was supposed to be about.
I'd suggest combing through it. As it is now, it needs a lot of editing.

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Kara

I enjoy the story so far. The strong female character is a big plus. Keep those chapters coming!

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Good plot

I liked the plot of the story. However, you should consider shortening your sentences and using punctuation to make it easier to read. The dragon character was a nice touch. With a good editing, your story could turn out great!

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Good plot

I liked the plot of the story. However, you should consider shortening your sentences and using punctuation to make it easier to read. The dragon character was a nice touch. With a good editing, your story could turn out great!

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Alpha of Aberdeen

The story has potential. The dialogue though felt stilted and I'd suggest to also enrich your descriptions instead of simply narrating what the characters are doing as they''re doing it. It felt like reading from a list. There also are quite a few technical errors. With a good edit it could turn into a nice story.

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Fairytale with a twist

An interesting twist of a popular fairytale. The timeline, though, is a bit confusing, as is how the protagonists travel from one universe to another using the carpet. Character depth and motivation could also use a little bit more work.
Keep up the good work!

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Love it!

I love the story so far! Your characters and the dynamics between them are really interesting. The only thing I'd suggest is to make Suri's motivation when she change's her mind at the first chapter stronger. It seems unreal that people that much depressed decide to live on a whim.
I'm eagerly waiting for the next chapters.

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Check the tenses

The story could be made more enjoyable if you work on the tenses. Present simple suddenly becomes past simple, and sometimes within the same sentence. Keep up the good work!

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Demon's of my heart

A very interesting theme and some very good descriptions at the beginning to set up the scene. Keep up the good work!

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Needs editing

A lot of technical errors, especially regarding English and grammar, that made the work hard to read. I'd suggest a few rounds of editing. Keep up the effort!

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Red Woods

The mystery created with the dream sequence was interesting. I felt though that there were too many dialogue bits. You should try to be a bit more descriptive, especially emotionally. Also, the summary should allude to the paranormal aspect of the story.

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Time to play

I found the stories simply describing acts, and not stirring any emotions. They fell a little flat to me. Also, the 2nd person POV of the last chapter was a bit unusual and threw me off. The stories were well edited though, with only a couple typos.

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Fallen crown

I wasn't very fond of the POV changes inside the same chapter. May I suggest keeping each chapter to one person's POV, or write from the POV of an all-knowing narrator? There were a few typos and technical errors as well. The plot could have potential with a bit more explanations, like the German that keep popping up.

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Brimstone

I really enjoyed this story as it was well written. The mystery was interesting and the main character was well plotted-out. Keep up the good work!

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Rouge or rogue?

I'm not really sure about the use of the word 'rouge'. Perhaps it's 'rogue' instead? Other than that, there are quite a few technical mistakes in it, too. The story, though, could be really powerful.

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Shows promise

The story has a lot of promise. What I'd suggest is to try and make the descriptions a bit more colorful instead of simply narrating facts. A few repetitive words, like ''king'' which shows up a lot, need a way around them. A few grammar mistakes as well. The story could do with another edit. I also suggest a hook-me-in chapter at first, before jumping to what is basically an outline of the story. At least that's what works for me as a reader.

3 stars overall!

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