Warrior of the Gods
I think you may be a newer writer, which is why you are writing this one chapter at a time. It's almost not fair to the reviewer because this first chapter maybe 100% different when the final chapters are done. Or worse, this is a first draft. But, I will review it. First, the language is good. I mean the text is readable. But long. Very long for a first chapter. It needs serious editing. By editing I mean cutting. The text conveys the same message ad nauseum. She thinks she is a loser. We get it. Now...get to why. Even better, don't tell us, show us why she is a loser. In other words, write the actual story of why she is going through this, and not through exposition, but through actual story. And do it quickly. Get to the point. By the time we got to actual dialogue, to get the story moving, it was so long into the chapter I already started skimming, missing the point.
Read the story now
The writer has the ability to write however. I saw a story in this. It needs to be edited, cut, polished, but its in there, so the bones are good