DragonsB

The Gods Return

Very nice beginning. I love reading a fast-paced and suspense filled novel. You have a very unique wording style (like the order of your words and sentences) that is interesting to read, it's almost like you're telling the story out loud when I am reading the chapters. And I think with some editing, your grammar and flow will improve a ton!

Interesting start

Intense start! Definitely will keep me reading to find out if she gets away or not, but I do think you should do some more editing. The grammar mistakes can pull readers from the plot quite easily, but after some proofreading, I am sure it'll be great! Excited for new chapters.

Need more updates!

Even though there are only two chapters, the stories are a bit predictable and not as intense as I had hoped. I think the author can add more intimate details to the sex scenes for a better reading experience!

Fun story

The blurb was quite interesting, you gave a well-rounded idea of what the book is about. However, once I started reading, it was a bit confusing since the characters were all introduced very quickly. You might want to consider taking a slower pace in bringing new characters so readers don't get overwhelmed by the information. Good work so far!

Mocta

I love your formatting in this story but some parts are a bit redundant like too much description. One thing you can try doing is to weave your characters' emotions through their actions rather than writing about those separately. Excited to keep reading though!!

Awesome story

From the first paragraph, I was hooked. The gore and horror are so well written and every chapter there is suspense. One thing I wish the author would do is write longer chapters. It's such a fast read, I feel like there isn't enough. Can't wait to see what happens next!

House of Fire

I love your descriptions and how you weave the character's feelings into their actions. Your writing style also makes it a smooth read. One thing is just there are a few missing quotations, punctuations, and small grammar mistakes. Love to see more!

Beautiful Slowburn

The story starts off nice and slow with a buildup that rises at a good pace. The characters are very defined with unique personalities. One thing I would suggest is to break up the paragraphs and omit some dialogue and descriptions that are a bit redundant. It makes the chapter look bulky with huge paragraphs of words and reducing those would make it a much smoother read. I like how you have perspective changes in your story but maybe be a little more consistent rather than just oh this is gonna be Adrian's POV today. Overall I enjoyed reading it so far and hope you continue writing!!

Ray of Sunshine

The plot definitely has potential but the pacing and character development could be worked on. The grammar and punctuation were a little shocking, but it's nothing some editing won't fix. I hope the author can go over the previous chapters and correct the technical writing :D