Good Book
Overall, I really enjoyed reading your book, but I believe you can improve on many things to make it better.
Title and Cover- Many people say, "Never judge a book by its cover," however, everyone always does. How else would a reader pick out which book to read when they have thousands of others to choose from? Yours are good. You have an interesting title and cover and you didn't use a very fancy font, which would make it difficult for the reader to read the words. However, if I were you, I would consider enlarging the words in the corner. They're too small to read, even if I zoom in all the way. Overall, I have to admit that you don't have the best cover that I've ever seen, but that can be fixed easily. On Wattpad, a website similar to Inkitt, there is an entire section dedicated for cover designers who are willing to design a free cover for you. Personally, I don't think Wattpad is very good for writing on, as it has a much larger competition, but it has a lot of good resources. Here's the link to the person who designed my cover: https://www.wattpadwriters.com/t/book-covers-and-character-aesthetics-fast-delivery-open-now/97461
Blurb- The blurb is just as important as the title and cover. I have decided not to read many books just because it doesn't have an interesting blurb. Yours is mysterious and intrigues the reader, but I think you can improve. Personally, I think your blurb should be a teaser. Blurbs should tell the reader what happens in the book without giving away too much, while teasers should intrigue the reader. Again, if you have trouble with your blurb, you can go to Wattpad. Here's the link: https://www.wattpadwriters.com/t/blurb-subtitle-service-2-open/124743
The Chapters- When I read your first chapter, my first thought was, "This should be a prologue." And that's exactly what it should be. All you have to do is rename the chapter to "Prologue" or something similar to that. For the second chapter, I think it's unnecessary to include it in your book. Without it, your story would have a mysterious feel to it, especially when Ethan turns on the news. I also think you should make Ethan listen to the entire story the reporter gives. Make the police sound clueless about who's doing it and whether the victims are still alive. Moving on, your pacing is quite fast. When I first started writing, my pacing was extremely fast too (and it still is). I found that one way to make it slower is to describe everything more. What does Ethan look like? What does his surroundings look like? Answer those questions and you'll find that your pacing will improve a lot. Another way to make your pacing slower is to show the reader, not tell. I am working on that too, so unfortunately, I don't have a lot of pointers on to to accomplice that. Last but not least, your grammar and punctuation. There are a few mistakes, mostly on missing commas. I have found many places where there needs to be a comma, but there isn't. Improving your grammar would increase your ratings a lot.
Overall, I really enjoyed your story and believe that it has great potential. Don't take everything I say to heart though; I'm not a professional writer and these are my opinions. Show your work to more people, whether they are on Inkitt or just your family, and ask for their thoughts on it. Keep up the good work!
-Author of The Tale of the King
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