Ellie

Good Book

Overall, I liked your book, however, there are a few parts where you can improve on.

Cover and Title- Personally, I really liked your title, however, I think you could improve on your cover. Your cover is plain and it doesn't catch the reader's attention. If I were you, I would design my own cover with more color, so that it would be catchy.

Blurb- I think your blurb is good and will urge the reader to read your book.

The Chapters- I think you could improve on your pacing, as it is a little bit too fast. There were also some punctuation mistakes, which if you fix, will help your book a lot. I also think you could add more detail. If you add more detail, it will also improve your pacing, so you can kill two birds with one stone.

All in all, I enjoyed reading your book and encourage you to keep writing.

Good Book

Overall, I enjoyed reading your book, but I really believe that there are things that you can improve on.

Cover and Title- I noticed that your book is romance, but there was nothing on the cover that signified that. Same with the title. I would recommend you change that. I also believe that you can create a very professional cover using free websites like Adobe Spark and Canva, because the sad truth is that the more appealing your cover is, the more likely people will read your book. I also noticed that a part of your cover is completely white. This may be due to a glitch on Inkitt. The only way (that I know of) to fix that is to repeatedly upload your cover until it looks normal. Otherwise, I do not have any advice for you.

Blurb- Like your cover and title, there was nothing in the blurb that told me that your book is romance. I would also like some more information on what happens in the book. Right now, I don't know much.

The Chapters- I really don't have much advice for you here. Your writing style is good, although I would prefer it if you add some more description and let us really connect to the characters. Right now, I can imagine the characters in my head, but they don't feel realistic. Give them faults. Give them strengths. If you really flesh out the characters, your book would be good.

Overall, I really enjoyed this book and encourage the author to keep writing!

Great Book!

Overall, I really enjoyed reading your book, but I do believe that there are things where you can improve on.

Cover and Title- Both are good. Nothing needs to change there.

Blurb- It's good. Any romance reader would get hooked by your blurb. The only suggestion I have for you is to proofread it for grammar and punctuation mistakes.

The Chapters- I really enjoyed reading your book. There was a great hook and the characters developed nicely, allowing the readers to really connect with them. Your writing style was good too- a perfect mix of description and action, which keeps the plot moving forwards. Really, the only thing I think you should focus on is on your punctuation and grammar. I found some mistakes, which interfere with the reading. Otherwise, this would be a 5-star book!

I would recommend this book to any romance lovers, and I hope that the author of this book continues writing!

-Ellie

Great Book

I really enjoyed reading your book and absolutely love your writing style! It was a good mix of enough details and action, which keeps the plot moving forward. Your blurb was perfectly written and it draws the reader in. I really don't have much advice or feedback for you- your book was amazing! However, I personally would prefer to see a more colorful cover that catches the eye. I also found many punctuation mistakes, which interferes slightly with the reading. I believe that if you run your chapters through Grammarly or something similar, then you'll be able to catch the mistakes easily. Otherwise, this is a great book that I would recommend to any romance lovers!

Great Book

Overall, I really enjoyed reading your book and can tell that you are a talented author. However, I do believe you can improve.

Title and Cover- Both are amazing, but you might want to consider making the author's name larger or more visible so that it's easier to see. Also, the word "me" needs to be capitalized.

Blurb- Also amazing! It sounds very professional.

The Chapters- There are only three things that I think you can improve on.
1. Personally, I don't think the quote and the prologue are necessary.
2. You might want to consider shortening some of your paragraphs.
3. Consider using text breaks- without it, readers will be confused when there is a scene change.

Take Me to the Deepest Blue is a beautifully written unique story. I highly recommend it to everyone!

-Author of The Tale of the King

Great Book

I usually give people a long review about their cover, title, blurb, and the actual chapters, but this is one of the few books that I don't do it to. Why? It's because I don't have a lot of advice for you. It's a great book. Here's the few pieces of advice I DO have for you though:

1. For the cover, I recommend you enlarge the word, "Hate" and put in your name. Also, I found that if I zoom in, I can see a diamond surrounding the title, but I can barely see it if I just glance at it. You should either remove it or make the lines thicker.

2. There is some improper grammar at times, but nothing too major that a quick scan can't fix. If you still can't spot them, ask a friend or family member to help you.

Otherwise, this is an amazing book and I would recommend everyone to read it!

-Author of The Tale of the King and Game of Lies

Good Book

Overall, I really enjoyed reading your book, but I believe you can improve on many things to make it better.

Title and Cover- Many people say, "Never judge a book by its cover," however, everyone always does. How else would a reader pick out which book to read when they have thousands of others to choose from? Yours are good. You have an interesting title and cover and you didn't use a very fancy font, which would make it difficult for the reader to read the words. However, if I were you, I would consider enlarging the words in the corner. They're too small to read, even if I zoom in all the way. Overall, I have to admit that you don't have the best cover that I've ever seen, but that can be fixed easily. On Wattpad, a website similar to Inkitt, there is an entire section dedicated for cover designers who are willing to design a free cover for you. Personally, I don't think Wattpad is very good for writing on, as it has a much larger competition, but it has a lot of good resources. Here's the link to the person who designed my cover: https://www.wattpadwriters.com/t/book-covers-and-character-aesthetics-fast-delivery-open-now/97461

Blurb- The blurb is just as important as the title and cover. I have decided not to read many books just because it doesn't have an interesting blurb. Yours is mysterious and intrigues the reader, but I think you can improve. Personally, I think your blurb should be a teaser. Blurbs should tell the reader what happens in the book without giving away too much, while teasers should intrigue the reader. Again, if you have trouble with your blurb, you can go to Wattpad. Here's the link: https://www.wattpadwriters.com/t/blurb-subtitle-service-2-open/124743

The Chapters- When I read your first chapter, my first thought was, "This should be a prologue." And that's exactly what it should be. All you have to do is rename the chapter to "Prologue" or something similar to that. For the second chapter, I think it's unnecessary to include it in your book. Without it, your story would have a mysterious feel to it, especially when Ethan turns on the news. I also think you should make Ethan listen to the entire story the reporter gives. Make the police sound clueless about who's doing it and whether the victims are still alive. Moving on, your pacing is quite fast. When I first started writing, my pacing was extremely fast too (and it still is). I found that one way to make it slower is to describe everything more. What does Ethan look like? What does his surroundings look like? Answer those questions and you'll find that your pacing will improve a lot. Another way to make your pacing slower is to show the reader, not tell. I am working on that too, so unfortunately, I don't have a lot of pointers on to to accomplice that. Last but not least, your grammar and punctuation. There are a few mistakes, mostly on missing commas. I have found many places where there needs to be a comma, but there isn't. Improving your grammar would increase your ratings a lot.

Overall, I really enjoyed your story and believe that it has great potential. Don't take everything I say to heart though; I'm not a professional writer and these are my opinions. Show your work to more people, whether they are on Inkitt or just your family, and ask for their thoughts on it. Keep up the good work!

-Author of The Tale of the King

Great Book

Overall, I can definitely say that this is one of the best books that I have ever read. There were a few typos; nothing too major though, and there was a paragraph in bold (I don't know if you intended that, but I thought I might as well point it out). Another thing I might mention: I've only read 11 chapters of it so far, but I haven't read anything about the Terruth Academy. If I were you, I would shorten the part about where they live with Gabriella, and get straight to how they get enrolled in the academy. Also, personally, I would prefer a lot more dialogue, but that's my opinion. Do what you think is best for your book; you are obviously a talented writer. Another thing I thought I might point out: you use a lot of parenthesis, especially in the first few chapters. Using a few is fine, but I think that that amount of parenthesis isn't necessary. Again, that is my personal opinion, do what you think is best. Another thing: I noticed that you currently have a total of 102 chapters. I think you could separate it into two different books. Sometimes writing one really long book can discourage people from reading it; I personally was intimidated by the length of your book. Different books in a series are like different chapters. By separating them, you let the reader take a break, if you know what I mean. For example, I don't think anyone would read the Harry Potter series if all of the books were combined into one gigantic one. I think you have a lot of talent and I am looking forwards to the day when I see this book in a bookstore!

-Ellie
P.S. Sorry if this is a long review

Update- I just finished the entire book (it took me quite a while to finish) and all I can say is that the author did a wonderful job! I highly encourage the author to finish the book and get it published. I will be looking forward to reading the next chapter!

Good Book

Overall, I think this is a good book, but I have a few recommendations for you.

Title and Cover- Personally, I like the title and I think it connects to the story, however, I think you could improve on your cover. Although many people may tell you to not judge a book by its cover, the only reason you will pick up and read a book at a library or bookstore is because it has an interesting cover. I understand why you chose that cover, but I think you could put in a picture of a couple in love or something like that. This is my personal opinion, do what you think is best for your story.

Blurb- The only thing I would recommend you change about the blurb is the first sentence, which is very long. I would break it up into two different sentences. Otherwise, your blurb efficiently hooks the reader and encourages the reader to keep reading.

The Chapters- I think you have a strong start, but you could add a bit more detail. I also think that you could've slowed your pacing (which I admit I'm guilty of, too). One thing that helped me slow down the story is to add more detail. For example, in the third paragraph in the chapter, "The First Time I See Them," I think you could've described Camryn and her boyfriend in more detail. Although I'm not the author, so I don't know what they looked like, this is what I would've written: "She has long wild curly hair with a red dress that matches perfectly with her hair and white heels. He has a red and white striped polo shirt with tight jeans and black sneakers." You don't have to use the exact description I used, but adding more details can both slow the story down and make it easier for the reader to imagine the setting and characters.

All in all, you have a strong start but could improve on some things. Again, all of these are my personal opinion, so do what you think is best. I am looking forwards to seeing your story being published. Keep writing!

-Ellie

A Great Read

This book has potential and has kept me on the edge of my seat. However, I have identified a few things that the author, Nikki Lee Taylor, can improve on. Personally, I thought the pacing was too slow in the first chapter. The other chapters were fine. I don't think you should describe everything as much, especially in the part where Gabriel was working up his courage to enter the house. Add a bit of excitement in the first few chapters; this keeps the reader hooked. However, don't rush through it too much. The trick is to find the right pacing. Another thing you could do is to make a short prologue in the beginning, maybe when Gabriel turned into a strigoi. Make it brief and mysterious. For inspiration, check the first chapter in the Harry Potter series. The prologue will give the reader more information about Gabriel, as well as making your book more interesting. Another thing I thought you could improve on is where Gabriel fought the wolf in the first chapter. In my (limited) experience in writing fight scenes, I found that keeping it short and simple does the trick. This means that you should not focus on the tiny little details in the fight, but the big overall picture. Also, I would recommend you extend the fight scene too. Personally, I thought that the fight was too short and wasn't as dramatic as I would've liked it. I also found a few grammar and punctuation mistakes. Since I write in American English and you write in British English, don't take this part very seriously. There are a few past and present tense mistakes and I also found that you have a habit of writing three periods instead of a dash. From my knowledge, you use three periods when the character trails off naturally while a dash is for when the character unexpectedly stops talking.

For example:

"What do you think's going to happen?" George asked.
"I don't know," she replied. "There are so many possibilities. We could die, win, lose, survive..."

OR

"What do you think's going to happen?" George asked.
"I don't know," she replied. "There are so many possibilities. We could die, win, lose, survive-"
A loud crash echoed throughout the house. They jumped up, ready to defend themselves.

Again, don't take my advice on punctuation and grammar. Actually, don't take any of my feedback personally. Just do whatever you think is best. This is my opinion, and there are many people who will disagree with me. I can definitely say that one day, this book will be sitting on a bookshelf. Keep writing!

-Ellie

Amazing

I can definitely say that I am hooked. I love mythology and one day, your book will definitely end up in a bookstore. However, I do have a few suggestions. For one thing, your book reminds me of Percy Jackson, so be careful. You don't want to get copyrighted. I also thought that your pacing was too fast. I don't blame you; I know what it feels like to want to get to the most exciting part of the story. I recommend you add more detail and descriptions. There are also a few punctuation and grammar mistakes, mostly with commas. Try using Grammarly; it helps me a lot.

Thank you,
Ellie

Great book

I really enjoyed reading this book and following all of your characters through their life. I do recommend, however, to clarify a few points. For example, in the first chapter, you said that her house was located at the bottom. Please explain that it is at the bottom of a hill. This part confused me, so it would improve your story greatly be adding that point. Also, for the cover, I recommend you add something more creative (you can change the font of your words). I found that many of the best covers lie at the bottom of the list of pictures, so you can keep scrolling down until you reach the bottom. Otherwise, this was a great book and is recommended for anyone!

-Ellie

Great Book

I really liked your plot, however, there are a few spots where you can improve on.

Improve grammar and punctuation and this book will be perfect (there's also a few mistakes in the blurb). You can add Grammarly to your browser in order to help you fix that. For example:

"Hello" he said. This is wrong.

"Hello," he said. This is correct. You must add a comma, question mark, or exclamation mark at the end of dialogues. This is the main problem I found in your book.

I found a few run-on sentences. Try making the sentences shorter.

Also, in the title, you must capitalize the word "Hatred."

If you improve on these, your book will be perfect!

-Ellie

Great book

S.du Plessis weaved an incredible adventure out of all of her characters. However, there are a few things where the book can improve.

1. Please split it into paragraphs. Paragraphs are like cues for the reader. When you stop reading a book, it is more likely to be at the end of a paragraph, not in the middle of one. It can help the reader ease in and out of the book.
2. I have found a few grammar and punctuation mistakes. I recommend you add Grammarly to your browser, it helps me a lot.
3. Besides in the book, I also found a few mistakes in the blurb. Please fix these.

Otherwise, S.du Plessis has a great start to her book and I would recommend it to everyone!

-Ellie

Good Book

I really enjoyed this book, with its sense of mystery and adventure. What I would recommend the author to do, however, is to make the book longer. With this plot, you can write a longer book, which means the chances of being published is higher. I love this book and would recommend it to everyone!

-Ellie

Good book

I really like your book, any child would love this book! Keep on writing and good luck with getting your book published!

-Ellie

Great!

I have to say, I greatly enjoyed my book. I loved how you described everything, and I can learn a lot from you! Your book is amazing, and keep up the good work! Looking forward to seeing this in a bookstore someday!

-Ellie

Great Book

I have to say, I really enjoyed this book! Romance usually isn't my thing, but I loved how you mixed in the romance with fantasy. Like your other book, this one also has a few punctuation and grammar mistakes. With just one quick skim through the book, you can fix everything. Otherwise, I have truly enjoyed this book and keep up the good work!

-Ellie

Great Book!

I love this book, with its mythology. I have not found any flaws in this book, and the only suggestion I have is to probably find a better cover. I do love your current cover, but try to find something unique, to draw in the reader. Although everyone says not to judge a book by its cover, we all do. Find something that is unique and stands out from the other books. Otherwise, this is a great book!

-Ellie

Great Book!

This book is amazing, and I loved it! The only suggestions I have is to make more dialogue, and to write more about Xia, and about her personality, family, and history. Otherwise, this book is fabulous and I would recommend it to everyone!

Good Book

I prefer your new version of your book, but again, there are a few mistakes. You should add a few commas here and there, and maybe make the pace a bit slower. I recommend you slowly add in the romance in the second or third chapter, and give a bit more detail about how they met.

-Ellie

Good Book

This is a good book, however, there seems to be many grammar mistakes. For example, in chapter two (Winter Vandelann) you wrote: "'Sorry, I'm in the way." He uttered and stood aside with his eyes aimed at the ground.'" Instead, you should write: "'Sorry, I'm in the way," he uttered and stood aside with his eyes aimed at the ground.'" I recommend you reread your book carefully to correct all of these mistakes. Otherwise, this is a good book.

A Great Book!

This is a great book, but you could improve it in a few ways. I think that the pacing was a bit too fast, I would like to hear more about Marie and Lucy, and about Kevin. Otherwise, it is a great book!

Good Book

Overall, I really enjoyed reading your book, but there are definitely things that you can improve on,

Title and Cover- The title itself is good, although I don't think you need to capitalize all of the words. Just capitalize the first letter. I also believe that you can make very professional-looking covers with websites like Adobe Spark, Canva, and Desygner for free. Otherwise, your title and cover are good.

Blurb- Personally, I would've preferred more information. Right now, your blurb doesn't tell the reader a lot about what happens in your book.

The Chapters- Your writing style is a perfect mix of action and description and your pacing was perfect. However, I found that you sometimes ask questions to the reader, as if interacting with them. Personally, I wasn't fond of that, but that's just my opinion. I also found a couple of punctuation mistakes, so I recommend you proofread your story. Another thing I want to point out is that I found that your dialogues are italicized. I don't believe that is necessary. Otherwise, your chapters were perfect.

Overall, I really liked this book and would recommend it to any romance lover!

-Ellie

Great Book

Overall, I really enjoyed reading your book. It was captivating and had a great hook. However, there are thing that you can improve on.

Title and Cover- The title is good, but I would like to remind you that the "Hope" in your title should be capitalized. Also, I noticed that your cover doesn't have the title or your name on it. Adding those two things would improve the book a lot.

Blurb- It's good and definitely draws the reader in. Perhaps you could consider proofreading it for punctuation and grammar mistakes.

The Chapters- They were good. There was definitely a hook and I wanted to keep reading. There was a good mix of action and description, although personally, I thought the pacing was too fast. I think that you should consider starting the book a little earlier in Maddy's life so that we get more time to connect with her and especially, her brother. The dialogue was also slightly stilted and the only way to improve that is to practice. I also found some punctuation and grammar mistakes, which you can fix by running it through Grammarly or something similar.

Overall, I really enjoyed reading this book and recommend it to everyone!

-Ellie

Amazing!

This book is truly wonderful. Every paragraph is descriptive and creative. I can easily imagine everything going on in the book and can connect to each of the characters. I found no punctuation or grammar mistakes and the first chapter easily hooked me. The blurb was wonderful, making the reader want to read the book without giving away too much. However, personally, I thought the pacing was slightly on the slow side. I would've preferred some more action and less details. Also, I found that each of your paragraphs were quite long. I recommend you try shortening some of them.

I also believe that you could try making a better cover. Although many people say, "Do not judge a book by its cover," the truth is, everyone does. The only way to differentiate your book from others is to create a unique and professional cover. There are many things you can use, like Canva, Adobe Spark, or Desygner, to create beautiful covers for free. I highly recommend you try one of them.

Overall, this is a wonderful book and I would recommend anyone who enjoys a good fantasy novel to read this!

Great Book!

Overall, your book is amazing! I really enjoyed reading it. However, I do have some feedback for you.

Title and Cover- There's nothing I need to say. They're amazing! The cover looks professional and the title is catchy. I don't understand how "Last of Us" relates to the book, but I assume that that'll be more apparent once you publish a couple more chapters.

Blurb- Interesting, mysterious, and draws the reader in. One of the reasons I was interested in reading your book in the first place was because of your great blurb!

The Chapters- The beginning was a bit confusing and I didn't understand what was going on. It was too detailed and personally, I think the pace was a bit on the slow side. However, once you get to the tornado part, I was enthralled by your book. I think that would be a better place to start the novel instead of the part with Dr, Kowokski. The tornado created a great hook, especially at the part where Cindy turns out to be missing and how the book flew through her. There were also a couple of minor grammar mistakes. They don't interfere with the reading, but it would be better if you fixed them. I found that a lot of the mistakes have to do with apostrophes. For example, the difference between "your" and "you're". They are both pronounced the same way, but the latter means "you are."

Once again, you have a great book and I hope you continue to write!

-Ellie

An Amazing Book

In case you haven't realized yet, you can write a review for your own book!

A Good Book

Overall, I really enjoyed reading your book, but I have a few recommendations for where you can improve.

Title and Cover- Many people say, "Don't judge a book by its cover," but everyone does. The only way someone will pick up your book on a bookshelf with thousands of other books on it is because it has an interesting title and/or cover. Your title is good, but I think you can improve on the cover. I would center the title and put "Medieval Mayhem" under the series name, otherwise people would read it as, "The Book of 'Medieval Mayhem' Roderick." I would also center your name. One thing you could also do is ask someone to design a cover for you, whether a professional one or a person who just likes doing it for fun. https://www.wattpadwriters.com/t/book-covers-and-character-aesthetics-fast-delivery-open-now/97461 The link leads to a website on Wattpad where a person is offering to design free covers and the only thing she asks for return is for you to comment on her book. That's where I got my cover. You could also find a professional cover designer, but it would cost money, so I recommend you do the former option.

Blurb- The blurb is also very important, as it is the second thing a reader will see when they pick up your book. I have decided not to read countless books just because it has a boring blurb. What you wrote for your blurb is something that is meant for the "About the Author" part. For your teaser, it barely tells you anything about the story. What does the magical book do? Why does it do it? What happens when they travel to another world?

The Chapters- To put it simply, I like your writing style, but your punctuation and your plot drags your rating down. Your pacing is good, not too fast, but not too slow, either. Your descriptions are good, too. They allow the reader to visualize what the characters and setting looks like. However, you can also improve in a few spots. Let's start with the grammar and punctuation. Having a few mistakes is fine, but too many will stop the flow of the story and can be very confusing to read. I would recommend you ask someone to help you proofread your book. Your plot is also dragging your story's rating down. I feel like your book is a mix of two different common plots. The main character's late father or mother leaves the main character a locked chest, with a magical item inside. That's the first plot. The second one is that a magical book transports the main character to a magical world or back in time, where they have the save the world. If you make a few edits to your book, you can easily change the plot. For example, the book could become another item or they could find the book lying around in a ditch.

Overall, you have a strong start to a book with a lot of potential, and with a few edits, can be published. Keep up the good work!

-The author of The Tale of the King

A Great Short Story

I really enjoyed reading your amazing short story (it's one of the best short stories that I have ever read) but there are a few parts where you can improve on.

Title and Cover- While some people may say, "never judge a book by its cover," everyone always does. The only way someone will pick to read your story over thousands and millions of others is because it either has an interesting title and cover. Your title is good. The reader can obviously see the relationship between the title and the story, however, you may want to consider changing it so that it has a sense of mystery, which might capture the reader's attention. My first impression of your story was from your title. I thought it was a romance story written from the perspective of the husband. I did not realize that it would turn into a mystery and thriller story. As for your cover, I don't think the person in the picture looks like the wife. In the beginning, you wrote that the wife had put up her hair in a bun for her wedding. Usually, it is hard to put your hair up into a bun if you had short hair like the person on the cover does. Also, I could barely see the words, "A short story" under the title. You may want to fix that too.

Blurb- A blurb is also very important, as I have decided not to read many books because it does not have an interesting blurb even though it has a great title and cover. For some reason, I can't view your blurb, so I'm going to dedicate this section on your teaser instead. The teaser is like a mini version of the blurb. Like your title, it does not have a sense of mystery in it. Having a sense of mystery is especially important in the blurb/teaser as it will make the reader think, "what happens in this story?"

The Chapter- One word- amazing. You have the perfect pacing- not too fast nor too slow, and have just enough description to let the reader visualize the character, yet not too much so that it doesn't slow down the plot. The only problem is that the readers won't have a lot of chance to connect to the main character before he gets murdered. Yes, we'll feel bad for him, but his death won't have a lasting impression on us. I recommend you describe his personality more, as so far all we know about him is that he loves his wife. Are his parents alive? Does he have any siblings? What does he do for a living? By answering these questions, it'll help your story a lot.

Overall, this is a great short story and is recommended for anyone who loves a thrilling mystery story.

-The author of The Tale of the King

A Great Start

Personally, I really enjoyed reading your book and I believe that it has potential. However, there are a few things you could change to make it even better.

Title and Cover- I think that your title is great, nothing needs to change there. However, for your cover, I recommend you add some brighter colors to catch the reader's eye. A lot of people say, "Don't judge a book by its cover," but the only way someone will pick up a book on a bookshelf with hundreds of other books on it is because it has an interesting cover. If you don't like the options that Inkitt gives you, you can also design your own, which doesn't take a lot of time.

Blurb- I think it's great. It encourages the reader to keep reading and has a sense of mystery.

The Chapters- First, I think I should start with the different creatures. I love how you described how they look and their powers. However, for the Lady of the Sea, you only wrote that it was similar to the Lady of the Woods. Even if they are similar, they have to have some differences, right? Otherwise, what would be the point of having those two different creatures? I recommend you clarify their differences. For the actual chapters, I can say that I love your writing style and the way you depicted each scene. However, I found some grammar and punctuation mistakes, which if you fix, could help your story a lot. Another thing you could do is write the story in the format of a diary. In a diary, having a few grammar mistakes is fine. However, whichever format you choose, you still need to skim through your book and correct the mistakes. Another thing I thought I might mention is that we don't know what any of the characters look like. All we can do is use our imagination. Therefore, adding descriptions to the character's appearance can help a lot. One last thing- I noticed that you have a lot of long paragraphs. Shortening them can also help a lot.

Overall, I really enjoyed reading your book. These are all my personal opinions, so don't take them to heart. Share this book with your friends and family and/or Inkitt to see what they think. I am looking forward to reading the next chapter!

-Ellie

A Wonderful Start

Cursed with Oblivion has a wonderful start and is a delightful read for anyone who longs for romance. The author spun a thrilling tale of a girl cursed with oblivion, a boy blessed with attention, and a story of love. The only reason I took a star away is because I'm not a fan of romance. However, if I were a fan, than I would've given this book five stars. Keep writing!

-Ellie

Great Book

Fragment of Destiny is a truly amazing work of art for sci-fi and fantasy lovers. There are a few punctuation mistakes here and there, but nothing too major. Also, I noticed that although this book takes place in the future, it says that it is the year is "1560." Another thing I noticed was the time. In the first chapter, you wrote that the time was "06:45," while in the others you wrote "1150 hours." Otherwise, there are no mistakes. Keep writing!

Great Potential

Throughout my life, I have read many books. Believe me when I say that this is one of the best books that I have ever read. I did find a few punctuation and grammar mistakes, although they are scarce and are nothing major. Try letting the book sit for a few weeks before you go back and edit it; it works wonders for me. Another thing I thought that you could improve on is fine-tuning the character's emotions. Personally, I didn't feel much sympathy for the characters, especially when they experience life-changing events, like when Josh gets herded into the snowy tundra or when Luna shows Josh her tattoos. Change these, and there is nothing to criticize about your book. I've been on Inkitt for a few months, and this is the best review I have given anyone. I am expecting to see this book in a bookstore someday. Keep writing!

-Ellie

Good Book

I have to say, I rather enjoyed this book. A few recommendations: You should start a new paragraph every time a different person speaks. Also, in the beginning, I would recommend to shorten the song a little. Although I loved the song and the lyrics, it would be boring to read about it for so long. I really enjoyed this book, and anyone who loves a great romance book would be dying for the chance to read this!

-Ellie

Good Book

Just like one of the other books I have reviewed, this book seems like it is written for children. Again, children would probably not understand romance, but you can easily change it so that its main audience is adults. Otherwise, this is a wonderful book that anyone would love to read!

-Ellie

Good book

In this book, it seems like the target audience is children. However, I don't think romance would be a good genre for children. This is because children wouldn't understand the concept of romance. Otherwise, I would recommend this book to everyone!

-Ellie

Good Book

I have really enjoyed this book, it kept me on the edge of my seat. However, there are a few things you could improve on. For example, I found a few punctuation and grammar mistakes. I don't know whether you are writing in American English or British English, but if you are writing in the latter, then ignore this. Also, I would like it if you would keep the pacing a bit slower. I admit, my pacing is a bit fast, too. It would be better if you slow the pacing, maybe describe everything a bit more. Otherwise, this is a good book and is recommended for anyone who likes romance!

-Ellie

Good Book

I have to say, this book is excellent. If you enjoy reading romance and fantasy, this book is definitely for you! I loved this book and would recommend it to everyone.

-Ellie

Good Book

I really enjoyed your book, but you would've gotten a higher rating if you would work on your grammar and punctuation a bit more. I have found many mistakes, and there are many parts where you could improve on. For example, you could add more detail, and split the long paragraphs into smaller ones. Reread the book and fix all the mistakes. Otherwise, I loved your plot and keep up the good work!

-Ellie

Amazing!

I can say that this is one of the best books I've ever read. Unlike me, your pacing is in the perfect tempo; not too fast or too slow. I don't think that it is possible to criticize this book in any way, and I would recommend this to everyone!

Great Book!

I have rarely read a book that draws me in more. You have a fabulous start and I love your plot. It may be just me, but I would prefer it if your book has a bit more dialogue. It would make your book more interesting. Otherwise, your book is amazing and it is written very well! Well done!

-Ellie

Amazing

I can say that this is an amazing book. There are a few missing commas here and there, and sometimes it's hard to figure out who is saying what, but otherwise, this book is great! I recommend you let the book sit for a while before rereading it and fixing all the mistakes. Otherwise, I loved this book!

-Ellie

Great Book

This is my second time reviewing this book, and I have to say that it improved greatly! I have really enjoyed the book, and I would recommend it to everyone. The one part you could improve on is the punctuation. Again, as I said in my last review, please remember to put a punctuation point at the end of dialogues. Otherwise, this book is amazing and keep up the good work!

-Ellie

Amazing

You have an amazing book, I love it! The plot is amazing, however, there seems to be a few grammar mistakes throughout the book. I also think you could give a bit more detail about the Beastlings. Overall, this is a great book and I hope you continue writing this!

Can Improve

This is a good start, but your book can improve a lot.

Title and Cover- Both are good. I mean, I DESIGNED the cover and influenced your choice for the title, so I obviously don't have anything bad to say about either.

Blurb- I would like to see more details. I know that it's about zombies and Minecraft, what who are the main characters? What do they do? Your summary doesn't tell the reader much.

The Chapters- I'm afraid there isn't a very good character development, and it's difficult at times to see who the main character is. The pacing is too fast for my taste and I often don't understand what's going on. Your grammar can also improve a lot. I found many mistakes, all of which can be solved easily. Chapter 5 confused me a lot. Was it a glitch, or is chapter 5 just devoid of words?

Overall, I think you have a good start but there is a lot of room for improvement.