How can this story not hit home in a community of writers? I am so happy (and a little frightened and ashamed) that of all times in my life I read this story now. I have a novel in the running right now for the Grand Novel Contest. I wrote it twenty years ago and it's been languishing on my hard drive since. Something recently told me to send it out somewhere. After I submitted it, I started working on a story (not sure if it's going to be novel or novella) that I thought up in college, many many years ago. That was a long, drawn-out and somewhat self-serving way of saying you really know how to appeal to, and attack, your target audience.
Read the story now
I was drawn in from the beginning paragraphs. I knew the hook was coming but I didn't know how until the very last lines. Bravo! Excellent read!
Now if you'll excuse me, I'd really better get back to writing...