What is your opinion?
The Little Man
"The Little Man recounts a harrowing tale of an unnamed identity and his nightly visitations to little Ellen's bedroom window. How the little plague doctor on his nightly visits entices ellen into granting him admission into her room and her constant refusal to his innumerable tempts. The story is seasoned with a constant condiment of dread and chill which culminates into one of pure horror by the end. The Little man, like a metaphorical manifestation of all the insecurities and despair that haunts a young Ellen feeds on that very insecurity, bolstering it, sometimes even giving rise to new ones. Here is when the story finds it's symbolism. Blind to the numerous attempts, Ellen's resolve is strong and she doesn't let the ominous entity in despite it's stubborn attempts. There is an element of foreboding and loss throughout and the prose flows effortlessly in this horror story. The third act revelation leaves the readers astounded, wanting for more. All in all a well-crafted spooky read with a twist in the end."
Enjoyable
"This was an interesting, well-paced story that was short and focused while keeping a mysterious air all throughout. Excited to read more of this author’s work! :)"
Eerie and Entertaining
"After reading this author's other works, I was really curious about how they would tackle the horror genre. And they didn't disappoint! This story is spooky and unique, with a dark ending that left me hanging. I like the way the story is told; it made me think of scary bedtime stories. Really interesting and unique! "
Interesting Idea
"I think the idea you have is really great and could be a lot more if developed a bit. I feel like the story is a bit rushed and maybe that's because you sort of boxed yourself into a short story motif. However, I think you could still have a short story if you didn't want to develop it into a full novel that would give us a little more. It's hard to make something feel terrifying when it moves so quickly. I can't really sit in the horror of her being a little girl when I only read about her time as a little girl for a couple of paragraphs. If I were you, I'd write maybe ten chapters and have them each be a night she experienced through different stages of her life - that way you can really delve into the idea of this ghost being a manifestation of her sadness and insecurity, becoming louder when her confidence fade and quieter when she feels more at peace and one with herself. I think her being triggered by her grandmother's death alongside his tapping enough to commit suicide doesn't necessarily fit. How do we know this ghost is evil? I think that part can be fleshed out a bit more since I'm not convince she shouldn't let him in - what is her reasoning for that? Why is he so scary aside from a strange appearance? It seems that when he tells her her grandma dies that the comforting her, so why is that something that would push her over the e edge? Is he lying? Honestly, what I think would be more eerie is if the parents come in, find her, and notice the window open - now that would cause a good amount of dread. If you really wanted to run with this idea, you could tell it from multiple perspectives - multiple children plagued by the same ghost (maybe in the same town - one could be our MCs bully, etc) and they each respond differently. That may take you from a short story to a full novel but that'd add a good sense of terror and different responses to it - Almost like "It" I like your writing style and there aren't many grammatical issues, so those skills are there. I just think the plot could be slowed down and potentially expanded to really give us a thrilling/terrifying experience. Overall, really awesome idea and you have the technical ability - so run with it!"
