Background and Introduction

Bonjour!

Ça va? Ça va bien, merci!

As you can see, I am a very French writer most definitely living in France. I hope you enjoy my satirical, fictional writing without the need to send PIs to my humble abode in the French wilderness.

To my friends at Scientology’s Office of Special Affairs (OSA) reading this, you can reach out to the aftermathfoundation.org for help getting out, as you likely already know.

Background [not fiction]:

A little-known [anecdotal] fact about David Miscavige is that he likes to play computer games. Another little-known fact is that he once had three ventriloquist dolls made of his three highest-ranking officers, which he used to mock and taunt them in various ways, like in the case of Mike Rinder - a prominent ex-Scientologist, where he would make the doll speak really slowly in mockery of him. It’s worth noting that the dolls were commissioned at the partial expense of the American tax-payer, due to Scientology’s tax-exempt status. With these three executives having later “blown” (left the Church) - the following story imagines where those dolls ended up in the following years.

A quick note on vulgarity:

Miscavige is known for being unbelievably violent, angry and vulgar e.g. he would finish text messages with YSCOHB (“you suck cocks on Hollywood Boulevard”). Therefore, if you think the following dialogue is gratuitously vulgar, and unsophisticatedly so at that...know that it isn’t in the slightest (perhaps only in idiosyncratic details). I am only being as true to his character as I can be without having spent time around him. In fact, between the dolls and dressing his wife’s dogs in uniform and making Sea-Org members salute them, the real-life character on which this fictional work is based is so absurd that one might think I’m being unfair. While running one story past my brother, he texted me:

He went on to say I need more background to explain this, which is what you’re reading now. Mike Rinder has also described Miscavige as the most vulgar person one could ever meet [paraphrasing]. I might also add that I personally have no axe to grind with Miscavige. The simple fact is I find him fascinatingly absurd and, with apologies and sensitivity to all who suffered under him, hilarious.

Disclaimer et al:

The following stories, while loosely based in reality, are satirical fiction. There are many coming, therefore any support you can provide me goes a long way. Adding to reading lists and commenting makes my “needle float”, as a Scientologist might say, and my “dick hard” as I might say - only in French.

All characters in portrayed in this book, although based on real people are entirely fictional. If you enjoy my writing, consider supporting my future projects detailed at www.buymeacoffee.com/cabe.

Yours Frenchfully,

Cinéma Pathetique