Out Of Focus

“What is it like to have the perfect eyesight?”

“What is the maximum distance a person can see?”

These questions rarely come up as we don’t really have the need to think about it. When we are born to this world, everything is undamaged, but the more a tool is used, the more worn out it becomes. But what if the tool already has cracks to begin with? How then should the person deal with the problem. Imagine the focus point of your eyesight being 5 cm or less, Imagine your eyesight being 10% or less.

Don’t misunderstand thinking this is just a story to make you feel bad for the blind because you couldn’t be further from the truth.

This is a story about a man who is visually impaired and the relationship he forms and breaks. One that explores human nature and the different choices that they make, determining their outlook in life along with the stage of life they are in.

Hello, my name is Lucas Mak.

This is my life,

Out Of Focus.

I use to hate what ever the TV broadcasts. Everything on TV is always so light-hearted and twisted. It never shows you what the real world is like. What people call entertainment is actually a warped sense of reality that people like to fantasize over, a form of escapism that people can believe what they choose to believe. They focus so much on their so called “happiness”, they push everything else aside, taking a blind eye to everything they refuse to see. At least that was how I thought back then.

Although I was partially blind, I still took my education in a normal learning environment. There were tables, chairs and a blackboard. Everything you would most likely find in a normal classroom. The only difference is I have a massive computer like machine that helps me study next to my desk. It’s a magnifying machine that mainly comes with two parts. One is your average old modded desk top monitor that is square shaped. The other part is the main device. A large machine with a camera facing down and a sliding board that can slide to any direction to some extent. Moving the board changes what the camera sees and enlarging it makes the worksheet or object bigger.

When children see something they don’t know, curiosity starts to grow.

“Hey, have you seen that machine? He’s the only one in the whole school who has it.”

“Yeah, let’s ask if we could play with it?”

“Hey man, that looks kinda fun, can I play wit for a bit?”

Me being the only one who knew what the device was for, plus my parents told me it was an expensive purchase, telling me not to lend it to others.

“Sorry, I’m not allowed to lend it.”

They looked around and spotted something else. It was another machine but much smaller than the other. This one is red and has a rectangular shape to it. This one is much simpler and straight forward, it works like a special camera. You put it on top of the thing you’re reading and it shows on the screen of the device.

“What about that one?” They asked. “Come on, a little won’t hurt right?!”

It’s kind of ironic actually. So much drama caused by such a small object. A one sided fight began and possessions were damaged.

When the broken pieces fell to the ground, making a sound as they hit the floor, the students who initiated the fight stepped back. Knowing there was nothing they could do with the fact that no one wanted to take responsibility, one of the boys began defending himself,

“It wasn’t me, he started it.”

“But it’s not like that sir, you don’t know the whole story!”

The other student added with fear.

It’s kinda funny, at this point tat it’s a competition to force the other person to loose their temper. It works like this, the person who speaks louder is probably the one who started the fight. At least that’s what the teachers think.

And depending on how cunning the child is. They can easily use that to cling towards grownups. It’s impressive how deceiving works in the real world mower days. On one hand people educate and talk about what shouldn’t be done. But when someone close dose it, they ignore their actions. Deceiving people might as well be an art form. If people wanted, they could bend any situation to suit their fancy. All they need is to say the right things at the right time with the right status.

“There’s no way he would do such a horrible thing, he’s such a good kid.”

They listen to whoever they think has has “the most achievements in life” just because in their eyes, that makes the most sense and they don’t have to think much about it. When children see they can take the upper hand and take control, they will do it to the best of their abilities, making sure everything goes well.

Soon the fight grows and eventuality grownups get involved. The fight eventually escalates from a fight between children to an argument between adults. Both sides fighting for their own sense of justice about how their kid can’t possibly have done it or how the other is lying.

Eventually things die down and everyone is left with sorrow. The classmates observe the situation and think to themselves: So this is what happens if you interact with him, I better not get too close to him.

Things got patched up on the surface but no one really wants to admit that they’re wrong. All the students start to ignore you because they feel that if they interact with you, they would meet the same fate as the bully.

Later on they would think to themselves: Why is this kid getting so much help from other teachers? He must be getting special treatment!

When someone sees something that benefits themself, they jump towards it without giving it a second thought. One’s needs outweighing one’s sense of morality. They knew that I couldn’t see well so they exploit it to the greatest extent. Grabbing my lunch box and throwing it around when I’m not looking, steeling my valuables and returning it after it breaks, And sometimes even physical abuse when they felt annoyed with me.

“Hey I don’t know how to do this question…”

“SHUT UP!!!”

And shoves me down on the floor.

Usually the logical message that society loves to hammer down your throat is to tell the teacher and prove that you’re Innocent with facts. But what do you do when the person you’re dealing with is part of the disciplinary committee.

Let me tell you, the answer is nothing. Let’s say you actually told the teachers what was going on, all the person needs is one sentence to even the score.

“I don’t know what he’s talking about, I think he’s making this up.”, The most powerful weapon in a bully’s repertoire.

It always works. In an environment where everyone begins at zero, status is everything and it determines your rank.

You know how in a video game, when you get to a certain level you are basically invincible. It is the same in life. Get to a certain rank and everyone bows down to you like a king. And who can blame them, the one who’s smarter usually has all the right answers so it makes sense to follow them. There are some exceptions to this rule but chances are slim that you will encounter someone that would even give you the time of day. That’s just the way of the world I guess…