Chapter 1
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Ghosts, Angels, Aliens & The Soul
I am just an ordinary woman.I am not trying every which way I can to convince you of the existence of supernatural, ghosts, Angels or the continuation of the soul inside us all.I have simply recorded my own experience within this book.You will have to render your own verdict from my account and make a decision based on your own beliefs.
I guarantee, none of you will be more sceptical than I have been.I wasn’t just basing my scepticism on logic or reason.If it indeed was spiritual and I was surrounded by Guides from beyond, Angels and the deceased, then why me?I am no one and certainly not worthy of their presence so I must be imagining it.
But one thing I am sure of now.I have imagined nothing.This is a true authentic account of my life with spirits and both the joy and pain they bring to my life.Whatever slant you may choose to put on my experience know this, I am a rational human being, a clear intelligent thinking woman who was taught to analyse and evaluate evidence to a high level through her first degree and her postgraduate one.Please do not simply dismiss it as nonsense but approach this short book with an open mind.
I see spirits and lots of them.They live with me in my living room and go wherever I go.Some people wonder if that terrifies me and at first, I will admit, it made me uneasy.But now I would be frightened if I did not see them there.They are my Guides, Angels, Protectors and I cannot live without them.Anyway, I do not think of them as dead.They are living spirits without a body.
This account isn’t a traditional self help or guidance book by a Spiritual Medium or an Angel expert.I believe the only person who can truly help you is yourself. This is a book about my experiences.It isn’t a sob story although it contains the many ups and downs that life presents and how I navigated through them with the assistance of my secret helpers.
I want you to be simply inspired by my own story to find your own way of helping yourself.There is light at the tunnel.I have glimpsed it on this dramatic funny journey called life.You are your own truth and power.Only you can help yourself.
This book does not ask you to be perfect and dwell in spiritual light.I am a little fed up with what is on offer on the menu of spiritual books out there at the moment.I have read and listened to a lot of them as audiobooks and while I admire everything Louise Hay has written and done, I am not enamoured with the way they all keep flogging the same message of how to be spiritually perfect.
I am not perfect or a true light warrior or anything else like that so why should I ask you to be.I want you to realise that you are enough.Everything you are, warts and all is perfect.Striving to make your life and even your thoughts pure is nothing short of a symptom of obsessive compulsive disorder which by the way I have and believe me I know what I am talking about.
It is impossible to be a perfect person and it drives me mad when Mediums and Spiritual advisors tell you to only eat certain foods, act a certain way and only see the good and give out light.In essence to be perfect and above everyone else as a light worker on the planet.It is meant to make you feel special and superior.Well bollocks to that.We are all special.
I have read hundreds of spiritual books by different famous Mediums, Spiritual gurus, Angel Experts and so on and quite frankly, I am fed up with the never ending lists of rules, meditations and more many of them suggest you follow to achieve a better life and light worker status.It is exhausting and often unachievable.This book does not even try to give you suggested rules.This one seeks to debunk them and tell you are more than enough as you are and are loved by the Universe/Source/God & Goddess for it.
Here are some facts of life:
Fact:Everyone makes mistakes.It is what we learn from them that is important.In my experience life has presented itself as a series of trial and error scenarios in which I have been given the choice to either sink or swim.
Fact:Everyone gets angry.You are meant to every now and then.Through the anger process we learn how to protect ourselves, be assertive and ultimately forgive.If anger is channelled constructively it can be a catalyst for welcome change in our lives.
Fact:Not all of your thoughts will be pure or from the light.We are told to control our thoughts or we will not manifest what we desire and the law of attraction will bring negativity to our lives.To a person suffering from OCD like myself that is terrifying.It is also crap.No one can completely police their thoughts or indeed the workings of their brain.Believe me I have tried as an OCD sufferer and it never works.I will repeat it again, you are enough.
Fact:We all have stuff to work on and improve in our lives.Life is a continual learning process.But if you think you are going to gain full on perfect light worker status and never let anyone or anything bother you again, always giving out love and light then that is your biggest flaw and someone has sold you something.It is never going to happen.Just be and give the world your beauty.Relax.
Fact:You are unique.An individual.Celebrate it.One size does not fit all.
How have I come to dare to believe these facts?Well after striving all my life to be perfect for a controlling mother who dismissed every effort I made to gain her approval and living with OCD, I finally let go when I was given a special message direct from the Universe.Yes, little old ordinary me heard from the divine direct without employing any of those special techniques pushed by so many Spiritual gurus.I just listened.And remember if it happened to me, it can happen to you.Open your eyes and listen to all that is around you.
I was going through my divorce at the time and I was alone in the marital home.It had just been sold and I had to get out within a week.I was angry and frustrated.The Universe didn’t care.Everything was being stolen from me.I had done everything I could to keep my marriage going including crossing my own boundary line for acceptable behaviour from my ex and still I had been rewarded by the Universe with pain and loss.I wondered what would be taken next from me.
In a furious temper, I poured myself some wine and started to dismantle the home I had lived in with my family, taking my lovely paintings off the walls to get them ready for packing.Distraught I sat down and found myself suddenly scribbling something down and as I wrote I knew I was channelling and this time it was more special because I could feel it was coming direct from the Universe in answer.
“We are all expressions of the Universe, good and bad.The Universe was lonely and wanted to experience life, feelings, good and bad through us all and we were created for that purpose.But we have become entities in our own right.We all belong to the same whole.There is no separation or difference between any of us, male, female or whatever we choose to be, good or bad or shades of both.Part of one whole, we are intricately woven together through time and space.
There is no point in arguing or elevating one above the other.We are all unequivocally one.”
What follows in this book is one of those expression’s account of a life with spirit, and the trials and tribulations of one of those expressions.I am no different to you.I am the same and because of this you can access your own personal spiritual experience at any time.This is my story.What is yours?
I needed a change, a dramatic evolution that would irrevocably change my life forever and boy did I get it when I least expected it!
Dip in between the pages and discover the story of how a frightened little girl riddled with crippling anxiety, afraid to argue for her own rights or disobey all those who professed to know better than her, who was an easy target for bullies, control freaks and fraudsters,morphed in to an Uber Woman through being reminded of her own innate spirituality and female wisdom.And remember your own.
So, you have heard of finding your inner witch and Goddess well I want you to tap in to your inner bitch and get in to a dialogue with her.Yes, that dark woman who gets angry and wants to hiss and spit her revenge and act like Taylor Swift in one of her pop videos but instead slaps on a smile only the joker in Batman would be proud of and pretends she isn’t bothered, retiring to lick her wounds in private.I want you to give her a voice and listen to what she has to say.Write it down, think about it and mull it over without fear.What is she angry about? More importantly, what does she need to tell you?
If you are scared at the ferocity behind her words and are afraid to let her out because Mother said nice girls didn’t get angry or your partner and family would frown at your supposed shameless loss of control and rational mind then grow some guts.She is angry because you aren’t listening to her and she is only going to get worse until you can’t keep her contained anymore and she breaks free to rampage across your relationships and life breathing fire and destruction.She deserves to be heard so listen up to her gripes and decide what you are going to do about them.
I ignored my Uber Bitch for years so much so it eventually made me ill.I did all I could to repress her and squash her because I was afraid of her tremendous strength and power.Yet at times she would burst out and I could do nothing to contain her.As a girl, I was not allowed to show anger or voice my own views like my brother who was automatically forgiven for his angry outbursts and suitably indulged.Any from me were met with disdain, contempt and heavy disapproval.I was ignored in my home by my own family for days until I begged for forgiveness and became all sweetness and light again.So, I learned to be quiet, demure and worst of all to keep my mouth shut tight.It was a fault I was to carry with me through in to adulthood and would cause me problems with depression, anxiety and eventually a debilitating neurological condition, FND which causes fits, intermittent paralysis and symptoms that mimic epilepsy, stroke, MS and Parkinson’s Disease on a daily basis.
I completely buried who I really was to accommodate others and ignored my Uber Bitch’s needs until I was forced to listen to her and act.How did I even acknowledge the existence of my inner Uber Bitch? Did I do it voluntarily?Nope.I was made to by someone else.Now here comes the interesting bit! It was a man.
It kind of defeats the purpose of getting in touch with my wild feminine self to seek equality but there it is. I can’t deny it.But there is more, much more . . .
