Chapter 1 | ✓
They will have a HEA. English is just a second language for me, so forgive me for any mistakes.
This is my new life.
Filled with dread and desperation. Filled with a sense of total and absolute betrayal. The injustice of the situation...! I was in pain. Filled with so much pain. Surrounded by so much dread. I won't stand it. I will not survive... I was so hurt... humiliated. The despair inside my heart seemed to want to explode... I now knew the word despair very well.
It was final, huh? They tried to take everything from me... and they succeeded. And now... Now? This was my new life. What a way to live. Or maybe, to die...?
When did my life become such a mess? I felt a sob rise in my throat at that thought. When did I become so pathetic? Weak? When did I allow other people to decide how my life would end?
I didn't deserve this. I didn't do anything wrong. They knew I didn't...! They knew..! His mother knew I didn't. But in the end... It was all for nothing. Because the final decision has been made. I had the papers to prove it. He divorced me. Nicholas had divorced me! Should I scream? Should I cry?
No one seemed to care... no one would listen to me. Not my husband... not my lawyers... My words had been dismissed more times than I could count. They thought I was giving excuses. I was just a frivolous woman. That was my new nickname. Slut. Frivolous. Empty. I don't know how many times I've heard that said to me. Behind my back... right to my face.
People assumed I'd made a mistake and wanted to get away with it. My lawyers looked at me as if I were lying and have said many times with some kind of contempt "Tell us the truth,” they said. "There's no need to lie here."
My situation had reached a point where there was no other way out. I tried to force my husband not to sign the divorce papers, but the laws protected me to a certain extent. Now... it was final. ”I should accept,” the lawyers said it. ”You should accept, Mrs. Sullivan. It's final. There is nothing you can do.”
They were telling the truth. I couldn't force a man to stay with me after he had tried so hard to get a divorce, right? Where was the honor in that? In keeping a man in a marriage when he had used every way and maneuver to get rid of me?
The only thing he hadn't done was hurt me physically... besides that... besides that, I was hurt everywhere. I was bleeding. Couldn't anyone see that I was stained with blood? Sometimes it seemed like I could see it. Sometimes I would clutch my belly as if I were hurt. But people looked at me as if everything was normal... as if my world hadn't turned upside down. It seemed like everyone's life was going on normally... except mine. I was a filthy woman now. That's what they said.
Looking at the ceiling of my hotel room, the cheapest and most horrible hotel room I have ever put my feet on, I felt tears slipping through my eyes, flowing to the pillow in the bed I was lying.
I could hardly sleep peacefully now. It was as if the images of Nicholas's face... his hatred... his desire to make me pay for a crime I did not commit haunted me. I could almost touch his face, contorted with fury and disgust. He had called me so many harsh, cruel words. He had told me so many times that I was worthless... that I had destroyed his love, and for what? ”For what?!” He had screamed, insanely questioning me... I could almost hear him screaming.
I put an arm over my eyes, trying to shut out the world that seemed to scream in my ears. This new life was a world of pain. It felt like a sword carved into my chest and it was bleeding. I could feel it. Nicholas... Nicholas... Why would you let this happen to me...? Why didn't you protect me from her?
She planned this. His mother planned all this... and he let her do it...! "Don't be absurd, Rebecca." He said countless times. "Of course she is not evil. She is my mother." His mother. She planned this. And he believed her lies.
"Nicholas, she doesn't like me," I have warned him, so many times. But would he hear me? "Of course she does, sweetheart. Of course she does." Blind fool. Stupid. Disloyal...! He believed everything she said. He let his mother... He let her... Turn me into this mess. She made a spectacle of myself. And he let her do it.
I hated them. I don't know how much I could stand it.
Nicholas, you let her do this to me.
I was now the proud owner of a divorce certificate. And what should I do with it? People thought I was the one who brought this upon myself.
Nicholas's mother had planned everything to perfection. I couldn't take away from her the work she put on it. Her patience in waiting for the right moment and doing everything as planned. Nothing was left out of place... everything was done so that I would have no way of justifying myself.
Somehow, a man was brought to my bedroom one afternoon and he laid down next to me, while pictures were purposely taken. I remember feeling really dizzy that day and decided to go to bed for a nap, after lunch. When I woke up, everything seemed fine, nothing really out of place. I didn't think too much about that day. But I should have. I should have.
Now, this was my new predicament. Divorced. Slut. Pariah.
Everything I had was packed in two bags and the last piece of my nightmare, the final straw, was clenched in my right hand... the papers I was forced to sign. Divorced.
At the present moment, I hated everyone. I hated my husband... I even hated myself.
Five months ago my life was robbed away from me. I was married to Nicholas for a year already. It was a blissful marriage, full of love and passion. But, at the same time, it was also a difficult life. His mother was mean and Nicholas couldn't see it. He refused to see it, even if it was right in front of him.
He wouldn't do anything about it and I begged many times for him to believe in me. Even when I said to him that his mother was not nice and seemed hateful, that she said really bad things to me, he would ask me to be more patient and to give her time to get used to us. "Give it time, love." Those were his exact words. Now I don't know who was the biggest idiot in this story. Me or him.
I gave it time, all right. I gave it so much time that I ended up being swallowed by that woman's poisonous soul. And do you know what happened? Nicholas didn't stay by my side. When the time has come the conclusion was... the most terrible one. He didn't defend me when I most needed it. He acted like I was the enemy. I can't think about this without wanting to cry.
I close my eyes with force, trying to detain the memories to haunt me in my desperation.
-Incoming call-
My struggles are interrupted by an income call. I didn't want to talk to anyone but I was waiting for this important call. I looked at the screen and saw it was my friend Melissa calling me back, to give me an answer that would somehow resolve my current situation. I pushed the button to accept and said with a tiny, broken voice. "Hello."
"Oh... honey, you've been crying." I heard Melissa saying.
"Yes. I can't stand it, Melissa. I can't." I answer, feeling tears spilling through my face. I was about to start bawling.
"Oh dear... I am so sorry... Okay, honey, I understand. But remember: it's his loss. His loss, do you hear me? He will discover soon enough what happened and he will be sorry. He will be so sorry for this! You mark my words. I can't even start to say how mad I am at this bastard! But you... you are going to be fine. I already have the apartment situation resolved. You are coming here, you will be working with me. It's a new start. This ass you once called a husband, he is history! Forget about him, do you understand?" She asked with a strong voice.
I understand Melissa, I do. But it is so hard. It's so hard...! "Yes, Mel, I do... I do!"
"Very well. Now, here's the deal. You bring this beautiful ass of yours here, drive safely, and don't worry about anything. We will deal with everything together, understand? That witch will pay honey, don't you worry. She will pay, and you won't need to raise a finger for this to happen, do you hear me? Bad people always receive what they deserve, honey. Are you hearing me?"
I love you, Mel. You are the best. "Thank you, Mel. Thank you so much. I am preparing myself already to leave, okay? I will let you know everything during the drive. I will be careful."
"Excellent. A new life will begin, beautiful Rebecca. Don't you worry, not one bit, yes? You are strong, you are a good person, and you are breathtakingly gorgeous. This horrible man... the joke is on him! And this mother of his... Just, don't think about them, okay? Forget about them! We are going to take care of you, okay?"
”Very well, Mel. It's all good. See you soon." She was the only good thing left in my life and I was so grateful to her.
"Okay, see you soon babe... bye!"
After I finished the call with Mel, my childhood friend, I found my forces somewhat renewed and used my hands to clean my face, with determination. I had cried more than I could count. I had driven myself to despair more than I cared to remember. For a man who despised me and treated me like nothing.
I would have my life back and damn him! Damn him to hell! Nicholas has made his choice and it didn't include me... It didn't include believing in me!
In the back of my mind, a little voice kept telling me that the pictures were very bad and it was difficult for him to believe my side. It looked very convincing because, in fact, they were real. But Nicholas didn't even try to find an explanation. He didn't do anything. He looked destroyed while showing me the pictures. While shoving them on my face, that's it. But when I begged, I begged him so much for him to believe me, for him to find an explanation, he refused. He told me to shut up.
I will never forget the most humiliating moment of my life. For someone who had lived a love story with a wonderful man, it seemed like a nightmare to be treated like nothing by him. Nicholas took the photos out of an envelope and threw them in my face, accusing me of being a cheater. We were at his office, in a building owned by his family. He was the CEO.
When he said those horrible things to me, I looked at him with my mouth open, watching the photos fall to the floor without reaction. When he told me to see the proof of my infidelity, I bent down and picked up a photo without realizing... without understanding...
There was a tanned, muscular man, lying by my side... naked... I was wearing a half-open robe. I seemed to be sleeping soundly and the man next to me was in such a... revealing... sensual... position that I put a hand over my mouth to cover a suppressed scream.
Thinking about it... maybe I should thank his mother? For not letting the man do something worse to me...? I was thankful for the most horrible reason... I would have died if that had happened... I would have died... Thankfully, that woman had decided to only use revealing photos and nothing else. If I could be thankful for anything, it would have been for that.
I looked at Nicholas with his face almost disfigured and he, in a fit of rage, grabbed me by the arm, holding my purse in his hand... and dragged me... in front of his secretary... assistant... employees... to the front door of his company... as if I were a rat... a thief...
Nicholas almost hit me that day, but controlled himself, barely.
I begged him to stop. Stop! Don't do this to me... but he was deaf... insane... he pulled me inside the elevator. Nicholas, hear me out! Out of the elevator, through the lobby. Nicholas, no, no... please! Through the front doors, exiting to the streets, he shoved me down then, with my face to the ground, and said with contained anger,
"I don't want to see you ever again. I don't want to hear from you. The staff will be collecting your things from the house and my lawyers will be in touch. Do not call me. Don't show your face here. Be thankful I am not doing something worse with you,” he finalized and that was it.
"Wait, Nicholas... Don't! Nicholas." I straightened myself up on my knees, with my hands on the ground, trying to look at him, to make him see the truth in my eyes. "Nicholas it's not true, I swear to you, it's not true. Please, don't... Nicholas... Believe in me... Nicholas..."
One of Nicholas's bodyguards, Peter, helped me from the ground, while Nicholas turned his back to me, going inside the building. He didn't look back once... not even once.
"No," I screamed. "Nicholas...! Nicholas...! Please, no... no... no.. Nicholas! Don't! Don't!" I yelled trying to free myself to run for him. Nicholas. Nicholas. Don't. Please.
"Madam." the bodyguard started hesitantly. "We need to take you to collect your things from the house."
No. No. Nicholas! No! He will come back... I know he will...!
"No... No.... I am not going... I am not going... Nicholas will come back, I know he will... He knows I would never...." I was babbling with dread, so much dread was pouring from my heart, I didn't know if I was still awake or if I had passed out from shock.
"Madam," Peter insisted. "He... madam... he is not coming back. Let's... Madam, please would you enter the car?" No. No. Nicholas... Won't you... Won't you believe me?
I don't know where I got the strength that day to keep breathing... to keep existing. That would have been the perfect moment to go crazy. To break everything in that house. But I didn't. A deep calm descended upon me... a certain sobriety. I took only the clothes I had bought with my money. The rest, Nicholas could burn if he wanted. I called a taxi to take me to a hotel. The security guards said I was allowed to stay in the house until I rented another place. How funny... Nicholas was letting me have a roof over my head. Damn him... he can go to Hell!
I refused to listen to the security guards and grabbed my things, got in the car and left without looking back. Still, I take no pleasure in saying that I tried to have the divorce postponed, without success. Nicholas asked me a few times where I was staying but I only asked back if he was going to go through with the divorce. These conversations happened via text message. He didn't answer me.
Seated on the bed now, resting my face on my hands, I looked at my few possessions and prepared myself to collect everything I needed for my departure. Today the divorce was finalized. After leaving Nicholas and his many lawyers behind, I checked into this hotel room to think about my situation.
I would receive money. I honestly didn't care. Mel told me it was my right and that I should be intelligent and not fight it. But I refused to use it for now, I mean unless it was necessary for my survivor.
That's why I was saving everything I could, which brought me to this little ugly hotel.
I get up from bed and make my way to the bathroom to clean myself out a bit. I knew life would be hard for some time, but I was sure I could make it. I was strong, I knew about my faithfulness and I would be happy again. I just needed to leave this place and never come back again.
Lost in thoughts, I was taken aback by a knock at the door. I was not expecting anyone and no one knew I was here. But the person was insisting and I decided it was better to see who it might be. Maybe the hotel staff wanted something? If this place has any staff...
I opened the door a little bit and was shocked, absolutely petrified, to see who was my visitor. Nicholas. Looking down at me, with blank eyes and a terrifying expression.
What does he want from now? I felt my face go pale and hot, almost at the same time. That was the face of a traitor, of a man without honor. I hated him... hated him so much he had no idea.
"What do you want?" I asked him furiously. He stayed silent with his lips forming a thin line. He seemed distressed but was just looking at me like a statue, not saying one single word.
It was as if he himself didn't know what had brought him there. His jaw seemed tense and his posture was that of someone ready to spring. I turned my face questioningly towards him but he remained there, watching me... eyes alert.
"That's fine. Bye, then," I tried closing the door but he stopped me, putting a hand to block my movement.
I tried to put some pressure and weight on the door to close it but it wouldn't budge and he just stared at me like it didn't bother him.
"Get your hand out of there," I said angrily, almost spitting in his face.
"I am here to talk," he answers tensely, pushing the door to open it more.
About what? What is there to talk about, Nicholas?!
"Did your lawyers forget something? Do I need to sign any other documents? Did you come to ask me not to use your last name? Do you want to see if I'm ready to do something stupid? Is that it?" I said ironically, wanting to get a reaction out of him.
A nervous twitch began to form on his cheek. He seemed irritated by my reaction.
“Let me in, Rebecca.”
