Silk & Steel

I couldn't help the sigh that left my mouth as I looked at myself in the mirror. The reflection in the mirror was one of perfection, just the way my parents wanted. Flawless mahogany skin, almond-shaped dark brown eyes, largeish breasts, and a butt I hear people pay for nowadays all wrapped in a five-foot-nine package. I ran my hand down my gold dress; knowing I had only seconds before my mother stormed into the bathroom to pull me back into the gauntlet that was this fundraiser. I never understood why they got so upset that I need breaks from these kinds of events, when you only let your child out in public a handful of times they are bound to have some sort of anxiety about large crowds. I was nothing more than a toy to my parents. No, not a toy, toys were played with and loved on, I wasn't a toy. I was a collectible something that sat on a shelf only to be taken out to be admired when my owners aka parents wanted any other time I was left alone locked away. Before the age of 18, I had never been further than the backyard, after that, I could count on one hand how many times I had been allowed in public spaces. 8 times. All parties my parents want to show me off at.

Not many people if any would call me a prisoner I mean how could they? How could anyone call a 10-bedroom, 12-bathroom mansion a prison? And yet I did. My schooling had been done in our library with the same teacher from Pre-K to 12th grade, my university teaching online. My mother insisted on my ballet lessons in the state-of-the-art studio connected to the gym I had to use 6 days a week. Another demand of my mother in hopes of getting to have the same Lilith-like body as she had, instead of the curvy one I had started developing at 12. It didn’t work my butt seemed to get only bigger while my waist remained small. If I wanted to watch a film, I could do it in the theatre room, and when your father is the governor you have the pull to watch whatever movie even if they were still in the theatre. As for friends? My friends were whoever my parents allowed aka children of their friends. As we all got older forcing a group of girls to hang out with the weird “sick” child got harder, but once a year they still came over and ignored me while they used my house as a way to talk about things they couldn’t in their own homes; afraid their staff will tell on them. 

I wasn’t sick it was just my parent's reasoning to keep me locked away. Their precious daughter couldn’t leave the safety of her own home or she could get sicker and possibly die. I questioned for years why they kept me hidden until they decided to pawn me onto a man of their choosing. Did they hate me? No, you would have to care about something to feel hatred. I was merely a stepping stone in their life, one they didn’t want but in their world children were a currency. If you didn't have an heir people looked at you as if you had some disorder, infertility, how shameful. But the thing about the wealthy circle is having children may be important, now how those children were being cared for? Who cared? The answer is no one. So my parents had me and as soon as I was out of the cute baby stage, I was thrown to the nannies. People knew I existed, they knew one day they would hopefully be invited to my wedding and that’s all they cared about.

We were finally getting to the wedding stage. That’s what those eight outings were about figuring out who they would pawn me off on, seeing who wanted their most prized possession. Me. Even though they already knew who they were selling me off to, I was still forced to spend those parties meeting man after man after man. The sons of Applehill’s most elite they were sons of doctors, senators, investment bankers so on and so forth. It had been so exhausting I couldn’t even be excited about being out in public I was too busy being a show pony. It didn’t make sense my parents already knew who my new owner would be they had since before I was born. Lawrence Fields II, future senator, just like his father before him current DA the youngest our state ever had. 

The man who currently had his arm wrapped respectfully around my waist. I wasn’t even sure when I left the bathroom and made it back to my fiancee's side, as he spoke to our parents and some other guests who had been lucky enough to be invited to our engagement party. I briefly looked down at the giant diamond that weighed down my finger, turning my attention back to my fiancee when my mother discreetly nudged me. I looked up and smiled at Lawerence in a way I assumed someone who was in love would. Lawrence wasn’t an ugly man he was quite good-looking. He was about five feet eleven so I didn’t have to strain to look at him, he wasn’t skinny but wasn’t buff either. His skin was a nice butterscotch color, with eyes nearly the same color as his skin courtesy of his Puerto Rican mother who was currently smiling at me. He sported a goatee with a slight patch of hair missing near the right side of his mouth, a biking accident from his youth he told me during one of our courting dates. 

“You too are such a beautiful couple, have you decided on a wedding date?” One of our parent's mutual friends asked, holding a glass of champagne in her hand. 

Lawrence squeezed my side softly before looking at me with a grin, and I gave one of my own. “We haven’t decided yet, but I can’t wait to marry this beautiful woman so sooner rather than later.” He kissed the side of my head, and I leaned closer to him like a good little puppet, causing everyone around us to aww.

“Well, Ophelia I am sure you can’t wait to get to planning! Planning my wedding was my favorite part.” The same woman, looking for a waiter to bring her another glass. Her sixth one of the night.

“Moreso than marrying the love of your life?” Her husband chuckled,

“Of course not my love.” She rolled her eyes, an action only I saw. I tended to see every little movement people made.

“I am very excited, but not more than I am to finally be Mrs. Fields.” It sounded rehearsed to me but another round of awws let me know it past the test.

The rest of the evening was spent the same way, me glued to Lawerence making our rounds accepting congratulations and well wishes, until I was finally released back to my main owners at least for a few more months, when my parents and I got into the back of the limo I finally let the yawn that had been holding for hours out, making sure to cover my mouth.

“You must be so tired from standing there and doing nothing.” My mother said in a condescending tone that she usually had with me when no one was around. I said nothing and just turned my attention to look at the window, it’s not like she was expecting a response my job was to listen not talk back.

My father pulled out his phone, he was always working. From the whispers I heard when people thought no one was listening everyone assumed he was cheating on my mother, but the only thing my father loved more than my mother was his job and I would never be on that list since most of the time he acted as if I didn’t exist at all. Where my mother seemed to be hyperaware of my being around, my father was the opposite I was nearly nonexistent to him. Sometimes I wish I had been born male, I think they would have loved me then.

Once safely tucked in my room, I took off my heels pushing my toes into my plush rug. I quickly undressed leaving my dress on the floor and removing the matching bra and panty set my mother had picked out, she picked out all ninety percent of my clothes, the only ones she didn’t pick out were the ones I was allowed to wear only in the safety of my room, usually leggings and a t-shirt, mix-match pajamas, or sweats. As I stood naked lighting the candle near my bed, I tried to resist the urge but seconds later I held my hand over the flickering flame. My first time feeling anything the whole day