Story Notes

Insanity is doing the exact same thing over and over again while expecting different results.

Well, whoever said that has obviously never watched competitive marble racing. Or been stuck in a dungeon on a time loop. Or watched competitive marble racing in a dungeon on a time loop.

I’ve done both. Many, many times. Because seriously, there’s not much else to do down here, and apparently one of the early loot drops includes a bag of marbles, so lots of people try to pay us in them.

Bags of marbles are also good for bashing in giant ant heads.

But anyways, yeah. My name is Nikki. I live on lvl 93 of the Doom Dungeon, where I run a burger shack. We also have ice cream. Because health potions are all well and good, but after being on a murderous rampage for a couple months or so, what everyone wants is something they can sink their teeth into (and don’t have to cook themselves). I was reincarnated into a catgirl here twenty cycles ago. Apparently catgirls are the only thing safe from being instantly murderized by dungeon crawlers.

Which makes sense, if you think about it.

There are a couple shops here on lvl 93. It’s the last “safe” floor before the big run to the finish. On lvl 100 is a big green button that resets everything and one back to zero. Except us, because why bother with the help, right? I’ve made somany burgers and fries that I’m now a lvl 100 chef, yay me. Mika, who runs the armor repair shop, is a lvl 100 blacksmith. Kimi, who sells the armor which needs to be repaired, is a lvl 100 merchant. She also sells potions. Aya, the information broker and announcer to our marble games, is a lvl 100 spy. Lilly, who can level up spells and give people new ones, is a lvl 100 mage.

And then there’s Dorothy. We… We don’t talk about Dorothy.

So yep, that’s our little club! Or, group-of-people-being-held-here-against-our-will. Same difference. We tried to break out once, on the first cycle when we’d been sitting around for a couple weeks and the most interesting thing to have happened was when a rock fell in Aya’s ear and we spent a full day trying to get it out without damaging her brain or something. Cat ears are weird. Those were the dark days, before we discovered the magic of marble racing.

There are going to be a hundred cycles, in order to find the top five best dungeon crawlers of all time, who will then be sent off to do who knows what. If it means getting off this floor, I don’t care what happens next.

The current cycle (21) has been going on for about a month, my marble (Momo) is in second place in the standings, and we expect the first of the players to be here any day now. Kimi had journals added into her inventory this morning, so of course we all got one. Mine is covered in lime green glitter, because my color is lime green. The icon in the shop is just plain black, tho, so that’s kinda… disappointing… I’d like something I own to not be lime green. Oh well.

At least us being color-coded makes there be no arguments in the marble races about which marble is whose.

Anyways, that’s all for now. Goodnight, dungeon!

Chapter 1

Dear diary:

Wait I didn’t do that last time. Heck.

Oh well.

The first of the players got here today!! That’s always an exciting time, since, y’no, it means we actually get todosomething.

It was a half-orc named Ox. I’m pretty sure I’ve seen that name before, but I don’t remember a half-orc having it. Maybe the Admins are allowing people to change races at the start of each cycle. It would be fun to be something else for a while, but I doubt it would be allowed.

Unless we all asked to change into something else, then maybe. But it would have to be something cute, like a fairy, or a DD-cupped elf with an extreme form of textile dermatitis.

There isn’t a specific stat to change cup size, tho. Kimi looked into it once. Not even a potion will do it, altho there is a gender-swap potion (because of course there is), that willalwaysgive people DD-cups when they’re turned female. Altho taking two in a row doesn’t change anything, which feels like a rip-off. Or at least Kimi thought it was a rip-off.

Anyways, yeah. Ox came, and had a double bacon burger with extra fries and a strawberry milkshake. There’s always atypeof people who have strawberry milkshakes, y’no? Like, nothing against them, but they’re always… They’re kinda full of themselves. And I get that Ox, being the first one here, has a reason to be full of himself, but ordering strawberry just sealed it.

The marble racing tournament has ended. Aya won the last race, which for some reason is important, but my Momo got the championship silver. Lilly won gold. This, of course, means that we can’t be friends until the start of the next cycle. Thankfully I don’t need spells. One cycle I got gold and Kimi got silver;thatwas hard. But traditions must be upheld.

Ox is staying at the inn tonight, we’ll see if he’s going to wait a few days before continuing on. Historically, solo players can’t defeat the 97th level. It’s sort of the great equalizer for the top ten or so. And dying there puts them back at like lvl 85 or something, with all the monsters respawned.

He’s been here before, so he should know about… Dorothy… and be fine. Some people prefer to sleep in their camping bags, near the gate. I don’t blame them. I would too, if I didn’t have an apartment above my restaurant, rather than deal with… that…

But! More people should be coming soon, which means more stuff to do! And the more stuff we do, the more marbles we collect. Yay marbles!

Goodnight, dungeon!