Switch In Awe - Pilot

Azelie stands quiet. The rays of early morning sun reflects off of the gold pendant hanging from a thin chain around her neck. Her dark brown hair falls past her shoulders and reaches her hips in loose twists. They are neatly taken care of and in symbiosis with the warm tone of her skin. Both her hazel eyes and darker skin gleams in the emanations of sunlight. She stands tall in her black heels with her shoulders back. The slightly arched eyebrows raise a bit as her gaze is averts up ahead. A subtle smile reaches her eyes.

The bridge beneath her feet is suspended above a small path and enclosed with clear glass panes. It is only accessible through a secluded entrance of the university or by walking through a series of corridors. Her eyes roam the scene ahead. Students walk, banter, and navigate paths towards the different university buildings. A few children are holding their parents′ hands, probably on their way to kindergarten. One child drops his snack bar. The people are clumsy and chaotic in her opinion. She lets her eyes roll, seemingly annoyed by the sight. The sharp hazel eyes shift their focus downwards.

In front of her is a wide table. Its height reaches her lower abdomen and is made of metal painted in white. On it is a three dimensional map of the Haidian district. It is detailed. Every road, building, and streetlight is incorporated. She deliberately places her finger on a seemingly random building. Then in a smooth motion, the tip of her finger slowly glides across the topography of the map. Her skin knows every ridge and interstice. Every single detail is ingrained into her mind. She takes deep, steady breaths and her eyes shut close. Her fingertip eventually settles on the corner of a specific building for a about a minute. Windmill cafe.

At the same time Jíyah arrives at Windmill cafe and picks up her usual breakfast order. When she leaves, Azelie's finger moves. In unison they travel the same path in different places. Exactly the same. Their motions coordinates, even though only one of them is aware of it. They both creep closer to the university. Periodically, Azelie slows down the pace and let it linger. She knows when Jíyah's first playlist has reached its end and her footsteps momentarily dwell when she looks at her phone in order to switch to the second one.

Azelie knows Jíyah’s every move. What piece of gravel she steps on and at what time. Every breath. Every moment of hesitation. Every single detail is accounted for. More silent moments pass. It is almost completely quiet. Only the faint murmurs below and the occasional sound of bicycle bells ring out into the silence. About fifteen minutes later Azelie's heart skips a beat. Three, two… She opens her eyes. One. Her finger has landed behind the building in front of her when she stops her movement. Right that moment, Jíyah walks into view. The increase of heart rate almost leaves her light headed.

Jíyah has black hair that cascade down her frame like smooth dark waves. Her hips swings from side to side as she walks, seemingly lost in her own world. A par of headphones sit securely over her ears. A faint blush adorn her cheeks. It always appears more when she exert herself. Even if that may only be a fifteen minute stroll from her apartment to the university.

Most cases of stalking describes a form of physical closeness between the pursed and the follower. Azelie has no need for that. She knows Jíyah's routines and mind well enough to keep an eye on her without walking a single step. Those preventative measures keep her well hidden.

Jíyah’s steps lead her toward where Azelie is standing. But she fails to notice her. As always. Azelie knows that her efforts are insufficient for getting what she wants, but her heart sinks at the failed attempts at gaining Jíyah’s attention every time. Distance creates safety, closeness grants access. Cyber stalking, heart throbbing yearning, acts of unnoticeable service, observation closely synonymous to scrutiny. She has gone through it all and intends to keep watching from afar. Even though it sometimes feels excruciating. Because the thought of Jíyah not accepting her for who she is, that would be worse than staying unknown.

That way, Azelie is able to remain within the margins of Jíyah’s life and in the very centre at the same time.

Azelie dedicate entire evenings to ease whatever problems Jíyah might have, from a distance. Whether it is small, like donating money to Jíyah’s favorite cafe so that it stays open or something more significant. She works tirelessly, even after the sun has put itself to rest beneath the horizon and the city has fallen asleep. But the workload is nothing to her because the payoff, making Jíyah happy, is worth more than any salary.

It is not about looking for something easy or ultimately self fulfilling. Azelie wants to put in all her energy and best efforts. Even if Jíyah never sees it. She snaps out of her own thoughts and watches as Jíyah enters the main entrance of the university. Distinct clicking sounds reverberate against the glass panes as Azelie turns to follow Jíyah. Their first lecture is about to begin and she wants to get a seat close enough to keep an eye on her girl.

Bonus teaser

[...] It feels like Jíyah has set all my senses alight. Her now intense eyes locks onto mine. She keeps creeping closer to me until her face is just a few centimetres away from mine. It almost makes me cringe the way we both clearly can hear my breathing quickening and becoming shallow. The beating of my heart sounds like heavy drums in my ears. All I want in this moment is to hear her say my name. She does not.

”…moron and fucking insane!” Apparently she had been speaking to me and I missed it all except the end. This is not going the way I planned...