Fated Love and Sacrifice

During the sunny days sometime in July 1971, in Sta. Mesa Manila… I, Celina B. Cottura, was a sophomore at Philippine College of Commerce. During this time there were unrest all over the country. A group of students marched towards Plaza Miranda and not so gladly that I, was one of them. Our group had already started, when suddenly there was a commotion, just then the military announced that we must be dispersed, they said that there was an order to kill the rallyist. Surprisingly, a man in uniform approached me and pulled me towards an alley leading to the main road, he then, called a taxi, pushed me inside the back passenger seat and gave me a one-hundred-peso bill…

“Go home,” he said slightly facing me. “And do not show up here again.” He approached the drive I heard him spoke, “Mister Driver, make sure to send this lady to her destination.” But before he let the driver go, he jots down his name as well as the taxi’s body name and plate number.

Time had passed until two years gone just like yesterday; I had stopped studying because of the declaration of the Martial law at that time. Fortunately, I got employed at the V. Luna General Hospital in October 1973. There, I met the military man who had sent me home --- Eismund C. Bayle, who was also assigned in the Food Service Division of the same hospital I worked with… in my own very thoughts, ‘Ah, small world there really is…’ This guy was actually on the night shift but he would wait for me to arrive in the morning before leaving his post. During the hospital’s Christmas party at that year, we were both assigned with the same committee for the event’s food preparation. And that started all… our acquaintance…

At times of day-off from work, we go out to watch movies, he was indeed a moviegoer… sometimes, we stroll in the park or do some window shopping… Following year, February, I popped a question on him.

“Mon, are you busy?” I shyly asked him.

“You knew it Celina, I can have all the time for you…” he replied teasingly.

“It’s the Feast of Our Lady of Lourdes. Would like you to accompany me to Lourdes Grotto in San Jose Del Monte Bulacan. You knew that place, are you?”

“Oh, sure my Lady… at your service…” he manly responded.

We left V. Luna early in the morning to catch up for the first mass in celebration of the Feast. After the mass, we look for some good place to have our breakfast…

“You okay with their menu here?” he asked.

“Got to be fine here,” I responded.

“Okay, you order and I’ll fetch some drinks,” he called the canteen crew and walk towards the counter.

“There were really so many devotees coming,” he remarked.

“Hmm, yes… always full packed of devotees,” I said. “This was built as replica of the Rosary Basilica in France.”

A little while after, we were done eating, we rode a jeepney going to Novaliches. And while on waiting for the second ride, a bus going to Baclaran, he suddenly kissed me… I was surprised and since I really did not expect from him such a move, I have him a rightful slap…

“I am truly sorry, Celina” he quickly apologized.

“Eismund, you have to behave… see we were in public… it was not likely me letting such actions especially in public…” I firmly replied.

He seems to have understood what I was saying and thereafter, we settled and got back from our trip.

Everything goes each day as normal as it seemed. Until one day, while we were strolling in park,

“Celina, I will be on several days leave, going for some days visit at La Trinidad, Benguet… my younger brother Crispo had been studying there,” he shyly said.

“Uhm, okay… you take care,” I casually replied to him.

Afterwards, he sent me home… and head back to his barracks.

Later days I learned that he was actually confined in the Infectious Ward.

“Cel, that ward man was looking for you,” a co-worker told me pointing to a guy standing beside the counter.

“Okay, wait be there in minutes…” I responded.

I stood up and approached the counter, the ward man handed me a letter. I run thru the words written on the letter and it was actually Eismund wanted me to visit him in his confinement.

“What was that Cel?” Felly asked. “From Eismund,” I gently replied.

“Why? What’s wrong?” Lucina batted in. I explained to them a little. “Hmm, you can have lunch break with him…”

On that day, at lunch break, I went to the said ward of his confinement, unknowingly, the Ward Officer was present and it the time that the assigned nurse was collecting sperm samples for laboratory check on the severity of the infections. Kind enough that they allowed me to come in and after series of checking and sample collection, the medical team left.

“I brought you some food to eat,” I said. “Thank you, you came…” he murmured.

“What happened? How do you feel?” I asked him gently. “You should also have to took rest sometime, especially when you have fever.” I noticed something on him, “You have mumps?”

“I was not aware of it,” he whispered looking afar then face and asked, “Can you do me favor?” I nodded. “Personal things, I do not know long the doctors will require me to stay here,” he continued saying and handed me the locker key of his cabinet. “Sorry to disturbed you. I have no one here,” he said with little sadness in his eyes.

“Okay,” I said then head to their barracks. I carefully check on his things and packed some that he will be needing while still confined for days.

Before I went home, I drop by to his ward and brought him some foods together with his things.

“Here, change your clothes first and eat later. You need some energy,” I told him.

“Thank you. You go home early and be careful,” he casually said.

I gently nodded and smiled. I had also asked for his laundry and left. Heading to Tandang Sora was a bit ride home.

Visiting him at the ward during break hours and off time to take care for him like that had become part of my daily routine until the day he got fine and soon discharged from his ward. After his confinement, Eismund reported back on duty for a while and later took his leave going to province to eventually visit his brother.

It was only three days leave, when he came back, he brought me strawberry jam, fresh strawberries and guavas.

Delighted, I asked him, “How do you know I liked these fruits?”

“I saw you buying them,” he just replied.

Bright days soon came back and we are again like we were before, our usual going out together during day-offs, on Sundays. I continued my studies and him, he was teaching at the AFP Military Service School. They had foot march every Saturdays and he visited me Saturday nights. Coincidence that we may be say but our schedules jived well…

“Were you day-off tomorrow?” he had asked me one day. “Hmm, yes,” I replied looking at him.

“Oh good,” he said. “Me, too. My day-off tomorrow, should we watch movie? It has been a long time,” he continued.

“Okay,” I answered him.

That following morning, he came to my place… I had now been renting a small decent room just near the hospital we were working together. He came to fetch me wearing good looking polo shirt, not his usual tee shirts…

“Uhm, maybe, it was better you wear a dress, Celina,” he told me.

Then I looked at him and jokingly replied, “Oh why? Are you planning something?” But he just shrugged off. Putting on simple dress and a bloomer underneath instead of a half-slip, but I have never thought that Eismund would do have some foolishness in his mind at this time. We rode a tricycle and instructed the driver to bring us to Quezon City Hall.

“Eismund, why we were going to City Hall? Movie houses were in Cubao?” I confusedly asked him.

“Calm your nerves, Celina… we will just drop by. Sister had asked to hand a letter to a friend working there,” he said.

We waited awhile for that friend he was referring to. Looking on my wrist watch, it was already eleven in the morning.

“Why was that? Waiting to your friend that long? I already felt hungry,” I told him. But instead, he just bought me something to eat. At about twelve noon, he softly said, “Let’s go. Friend has arrived.”

He held my hand carefully but firm as we entered through the office… and it so happen that what we actually entered was the Office of the Mayor… everybody inside cheerfully greeted us “Welcome”

I looked at him with a fuss, searching his eyes and silently searching for answers… and finally whispers came out and asked him, “Is this a wedding?” But he gave no answer…

The City Mayor broke the seemingly silence in the room. “Well, it was time now to start… where were the sponsors?”

I looked up to him again still trying to have him say something… anything … “Eismund, what is this? A wedding ceremony? How could you do this?” It was like that I should have just run out and scream… but I am a lady and having thought of maintaining dignity and upholding pride. Should I run, they will laugh at me… we both came together and we both waited for the time… both of us will be put in an embarrassing position… it was not just him or me, but us.

And there was it… twenty-fifth day of October 1974… our wedding day.

After the ceremony, we went to a nearby restaurant just behind the City Hall, together with the City Mayor and the Sponsors. When everything’s done, he sent me home, both silent… no talking… I was very tired and not really feeling well… “You go back to your barracks.” He handed me the marriage contract and quietly left.

The following day, he came to my house for breakfast and we ate together. He had also come back at night for dinner but he dd not stayed since I do not allow him to sleep with me yet, and he had leave and get back to his barracks. The following days, stayed the same. And during day-offs, we go out for movies or stroll at the park as the usual us, like ordinary sweethearts… some time over, he can hold my hands and kissed, with my permission of course… He had always bought me something like jewelries and hair clips, well, these days that I had still my hair long… But honestly, I really did wonder how he would know things likely to my eyes when he never asked me nor I had never told him. He was like seriously very much attentive in my every action…

Once he handed me a box and said, “Hope you like it.” As I opened the box, can’t help but wide eyed seeing what was in it… it was the jewelry I had been staring at the store the days before hand and maybe, he’ d seen me looking at it and he had waited for payday to buy it for me. “Oh, it was really beautiful… thank you.” And he carefully put it on me.

Days past and I’m beginning to actually like him… just being him… very thoughtful and a gentleman. Even for the fact, that we already got married for real, Eismund had never insisted on forcing himself on me. He was kind to my parents, but unfortunately, this kindness was not reciprocated well as it would have been, they do not like Eismund.

----

“Celina,” Aunt Ren said. “How was it? Are you not having your thoughts mindfully?”

“Why Auntie?” I casually asked.

“And you asked me why?” she replied. “You knew it… you knew what I was talking about…Celina.”

“Aunt Ren, please.”

“Your parents knew this? Did Cereno approved? Maybe, not. Have you even told Fleur all about this before it got to your father???” she asked. So much questions, I do not even know when to start answering or I could even answer one of those running words that some I may not even heard at all…

Aunt Ren was pointing out reasons they rejected Eismund … Firstly, he was not a Catholic and ours was a devoted one… Second, he was part of the cultural minority and sadly, came from a ‘not so’ broken family… Third, maybe on my very personal account, I had a boyfriend then, cadet of the Philippine Military Academy. And Eismund … maybe on their perspective, seen him just a soldier, but they did not know, he was the man who once saved me that sunny day.

My thoughts really float… as our relationship had been facing many problems… Aunt Ren was right for the fact that my parents did not know Eismund and I, their daughter Celina, were actually civilly wed, since having our age does not both require parental consent… He was twenty-five and I am twenty-two… And thereafter, everything been considered all to God’s will and me hoping the very best that not a single thing goes wrong, had always prayed for God’s guidance.

And fate is fate…problem seems coming its way out…

“Ms. Celina B. Cottura,” the clerk called.

“Yes, Mam,” I answered. “Kindly come forward,” the clerk gestured on me.

“You were applying for the change of your status, right?” the clerk said. “From single to married,” she continued as she was reading my submitted documents. “Miss, in your application, you married into a military man, where is the attachment document for the copy of his ‘permission to get married’?” then I was informed that such permission certificate is required for a military man before entering into a marriage ceremony… and since I had none on my documents, my request was temporarily put on hold and they even advised not to file the marriage contract to the National Statistics Office until such requirement had been duly accomplished and approved. It had been quite a long process… it had to be passed in the General Head Quarters, Camp Emilio Aguinaldo and Fort Bonifacio… because he belonged to the Philippine Army. And after completing all the requirements we have to renew our wedding vows…

-----

“I am really sorry Ken,” I told my then, boyfriend, just looking at me with pitiful look. “Besides, we already gotten civilly married… Hope you’d understand…”

That pause was too long for Ken to respond, “I,” he turned back and stared away from me… “I, actually, did hope… that… you’ll not… that you’ll not change your mind…. and… still chose me…. But I guessed, your heart had gotten complicatedly changed… and…”

“Ken,” I snapped.

“Celi… it would be shame if I would say that I will be fine after all these happened… but having the thoughts of us… still lingers in my mind… those times… before it had become the two of you now…” he continued still having his on back. “But what can I do… you may be confused… but your heart seems to have already decided for you… and me.”

We did break up… no more Ken and Celina…

-----

Eismund had really been serious in bringing on with me, and since that day at the City Hall, he had already given me his hard-earned money from military service, and we were able to keep our savings for our church wedding. Our life together had been going through by all odds… but one day, my father came to me at workplace,

“Celina,” father started. “Can we have time and talk??” then he paused. Father and I walked over to our department’s visitors’ lounge. “You resign from that work now and go back with me to our hometown,” he continued.

“Papa? What? And why were you telling me this sudden?” I talked back.

“Ah, my daughter,” he snapped.” You listen, get your things ready and we will be going back to our hometown soon. It was time that we will be preparing for your wedding ceremony…” Father was actually referring to that tradition, a marriage set-up he had made and compromised with his fellow businessman to have me his daughter marry this businessman’s son at the time we both came to age. After that, he left me silently thinking over things what my father had just said.

Unknown to me that my father had also gotten and talked to Eismund before he finally left and went to Tandang Sora, Aunt Ren’s place. After work that same afternoon, I found Eismund was at my house… he had been really looked too formal, not the usual him whenever he visited me nor when we go out for movies or strolling, it made me really felt uneasy at that moment, for sure he was not drunk, but the air was not good at all…

“Why did not you tell?” he asked firmly.

“About what?” I confusedly replied.

“Your father just came to me,” he then paused a while. “He talked to me and he told me several things… you…”

“Then what was your decision?”

He faced me seriously and said, “Go back to your family… I cannot give you the life you have had with your parents.”

Then he slowly turned his back on me, but I stopped him and did not let him go back to his barracks, instead, I whispered, “Sleep here tonight…” But that night, he could not sleep and we remain and stayed awake the whole night together… really have felt those uneasy feelings… We both did not report to work either the following day.

As we finished lunch, my father came,

“Celina,” father said. “Get you things ready, we are going…”

Eismund came forward and held my hand tightly and courageously told my father,” Sorry Sir, with due respect but I cannot give your daughter back to you anymore…” then he paused, “I will take care of Celina from now on… Again, Sir… I am sorry.”

My father turned to me and asked, “Were you not going???”

“I am very sorry Papa, but we were already married,” I said. “Papa, we were looking forward that you and Mama will give us your blessings on our marriage…”

At that moment, unknowing what my father actually felt but he later left and told us that his flight would be at nine that night.

-----

We set our church wedding ceremony o the same date as that of our civil marriage date. While we were on our preparations, we received a letter from his second brother, Marion, asking money, as written in the letter that he was to marry Coney, a lady whom Marion had been with and said to have been pregnant, as of the date we received the letter. Since they had already lost their father, my husband, being the eldest, had become the family’s bread winner.

It was September 1975, and our supposed church wedding would be the coming October…

“Cel, hon, may we move our church wedding to give way to that marriage of Marion and Coney?” he suggested.

“Well, is there any other way? May I ask Mr. Eismund?” I replied. “Okay. Since, my husband been to kind and decided, well, I do agree with your suggestion to reschedule our church wedding to give way to this…”

“Hmm, you were really kind, my dear little Celina,” he said then gently hugged me.

----

He set forth and went to their hometown, to meet with the parents and family of his brother’s future bride, and standing as the Eldest of their family, as we both have agreed, Eismund gave his brother’s future parent-in laws’ the amount we have actually saved for our wedding supposedly scheduled just a month after their notice. Then, later we were informed that the wedding was actually cancelled and instead took place at the same time of christening of their first born, the following year.

“They said, Marion’s wedding was temporarily cancelled and they waited until Coney gave birth,” he told me.

“Oh,” a short and simple remark that I could ever replied him. “And the wedding and the christening were performed at the same day.” I just kept mum, what else can I say.

In April 1976, he decided to move in and told me, “This house maybe small but it can have us both, right my wife?”

“Huh?” I smirked. Then he continued teasingly, “We had been civilly married… legally husband and wife…”

Well, mother had always reminded us, sisters, of becoming submissive wife once we have gotten married.

If I do not let him stay, he would leave but will came back drunk and never stopped talking, and repeatedly asked me, ’Why I could not sleep at my wife’s house and ended up letting him stayed knowing he was such a gentleman even at times he was drunk, he was never forceful. And human as were, we could no longer resists. And besides, as for me knowing the severity of his medical conditions a year past that I took care of him, curiosity also had me to think the percentage of chances whether he could give a child… and that for sure as wife, I wanted a child… Our very first night, I can’t help but whisper, ’It hurts, please be gentle…” and until this first had become seven ‘first’ nights until succeeded, as he was that a gentleman not to hurt me at any way possible.

There goes our routine, living together in same roof as civilly wedded husband and wife… preparing ourselves for work and seeing each other through…

“My Celina, remember Crispo, my younger brother I visited studying at Benguet?” he asked me one day. “He will continue his studies here in Manila and I told him that he will be staying at the barracks,” he continued.

“Okay, as long as he would never become another problem to us,” I casually replied. “Remember, that our family must come first.”