What is your opinion?
Greeting And Appreciation Request!!
"Hi, I’m Aliana a professional comic, webtoon, and manga artist with a passion for cinematic storytelling. I read your story on Inkitt and was completely hooked by the emotion, depth, and unique world you created. I specialize in expressive, high quality art that brings characters and worlds vividly to life. Let’s turn your story into a stunning visual experience connect with me on Discord: Aliana_Jordan"
So good, so far!
"Grammar and spell checking is the only faults I see so far. The transition of explaining things throughout the story was pretty smooth and allowed to show the difference between the two tribes of people. I can't wait for another chapter!"
....
"Still liking the story, a few misspelt words, but that's only me being picky...... "
Hidden Truths
"This story is amazing. I love the amount of information that is given because no reader will be left in the dark as to what these affinities do or how common they are and etc. The only thing I could say needs improvement is the grammar but it’s not terrible, nor does it make the start hard to follow. I love it so much I hope this is where you decided to give up on it:( you’re doing a wonderful job on this book. "
Brinkley44
"it's a take off of the Aztec stories, done nicely. "
Pulls you in
"I love how this is playing out. It’s clear there’s a plan and a lot of forethought into the plot"
Hidden Truths
"Mael is such an incredible female lead and I love reading this story! Can’t wait to read more!"
Refreshing
"I love where the plot is going. The character development so far is great. As a reader, I fall in love with the main heroine more every chapter. It's refreshing to read about a independent and strong female lead without her so rude and being very arrogant. "
Super exciting and thrilling plot
"I cant wait to read more i love the strong heorine, not the damsel in distress story (Thank god). The overall plot seems exciting and can develope into something really great ! "
Wonderful Story
"I love your story. The plot is very good and your writing style is easy to read and flows well. Sorry I had to give you 2 stars on the grammar, but there are a lot of misspelled words. I know this is a rough draft and that you will go through and correct them. Your story will be so awesome once your do that. The best advice I can give you is to use the app Grammarly. It is free and will help you clean up your manuscript. I am disappointed that the rest of the story is not here yet. I really want to know what is going to happen!!!"
Intriguing.
"I like it. At the beginning, the writer portrays such a perfect sense of freedom, or nature. As has been said, I too could 'smell' the jungle. Our writer did a brilliant job with descriptions in the first part. Sometimes, one word is overused in a single paragraph - e.g. 'connect/ing' about connecting with the earth. Try some synonyms. To be honest, I felt let down when the whole thing about the connection with the earth came up. It was shaping up to be a good read, but, I don't know, I feel that it just doesn't quite fit into the storyline. Also, try and give us some description about the place she wakes up in. Yes, she might be tied up on the floor and yes, she might not be able to focus through the headache, but SOMETHING at least. Is it light or dark? What is the ground like? What sounds are around her? Try describing with all 5 senses. Other than these, I like the way your story is going. It looks like you researched a bit into archery, just by the words you have chosen to explain it. This is a very helpful site I found when doing some research on archery myself: http://inkandquills.com/2015/06/19/what-writers-need-to-know-about-archery/ I hope this helps! -Adie"
Visually Beautiful
"-UPDATED- Re reading the first chapter I've fallen in love with your story again. The style you write in is by using a fair amount of detail which in my opinion is a really good trait, you don't over power your story with description; giving the reader a good amount to visualise your world that you're creating. The only problem that's stopping the story from progressing further has to be when it comes to your writing skills, as you're writing in first person which I do you seem to over use 'I' to tell the readers your doing this action. Which is unnecessary if you were to read over your story when you're (picking up the bow) you can probably tell what I'm talking about, remember in the first person you can add much more verbs than a third person novel. -Jayne-"
