My Sister Killed Me, Again...

People suck, like, really suck. Not just the simple kind of sucking, hell, not even the physical kind. What I’m trying to say here is, don’t make friends, don’t go outside, and please, please don’t love your siblings.

Cut everything and everyone out, and you’ll be immune to the disease of sucking. Sucking is easily the most deadly aspect of people. They drag onto you, and SUCK your time away with their problems. I believe that being alone is the cure to sucking. When all you have to worry about is you, then of course everyone else’s problems won’t affect you in the slightest! That is my truth, my excellent truth!

There's no way I’d let anyone suck me, because I’ve been training. For weeks I’ve spoken only one word to everyone around me! And how much dread have they tried to vent to me? None.

“Luke, Luke honey…”

My mother had spoken to me, with her saddened voice.

“Me and your father have gotten...divorced.”

She expected me to care, or to cry, to give in to her sucking my time away with her issues. But I had honed the skill repelling the suck.

“Ok, Mom.”

Her mouth opened up like a shark, and her eyes got bigger.

“OK!? Aren’t you gonna say something?”

“No.”

“LUKE! Your father cheated on me with another woman who had a daughter!”

“Ok.”

“Grrr…”

My mother was pretty pissed, but I saw it as jealousy of my skill. As she kept yelling and yelling with her angriest saddish voice, I just kept nodding my head again and again. I had no care in the world, and all I wished to do was go back to playing my game. But my mother had some different wishes.

“YOU KNOW WHAT!? Luke, just go ahead and choose which one of us you want to stay with.”

“I don’t care which.”

“You have to choose!”

“Flip a coin or something I don’t know.”

Pulling out a quarter, she threw it upwards. I didn’t care enough to look up, but once it fell down, I glanced a bit at the results. Heads, it was heads.

“Pack your bags, you’re going to stay with your asshole of a father.”

“Ok.”

And pack, I did. After about a week, I got everything ready to go up to Florida with my dad and his step daughter. He talked to me on the phone about being excited, or something like that I wasn’t paying attention. Apparently I would have to stay in the same room with my step sister? That was the only part of his blabbing that I remembered. Sharing a room would only strengthen my skills of suck dodging. I’ll be an actor playing the role of a brick wall. She’ll be the tennis player bouncing her multitude of balls full of her problems and teenage venting, and each of them will bounce right back to her. Oh how great this will be, how great...