Mixed feelings

"I have very mixed feelings about this story. On the one hand, the writing quality is excellent, immediate, the characters are very well described, the inner voice of the main character is clear and original. On the other hand, I found it hard to relate to the main character because she's...too lucky I guess? It feels kind of like the L Word--one of those impenetrable cool-lesbian circles where everybody has dated everybody--and while the dramatic tension of the story is supposed to be whether the narrator gets with Florence, it didn't really seem like she cared too much about whether it happens or not. I found myself more wanting to get into the perspectives of the less-lucky non-POV characters, especially AJ. Please let me know what you think of mine as well, that is if you're not too grossed out by het romance. (Really messed-up, conflicted het romance, not hearts-and-flowers stuff.) It's called "Hatefuck" and it's in the fandom 3 contest."