Chapter 1
Alex
It was really cold outside, thinking back I should’ve worn something warmer then a sweater and some leggings. But it was too late to head back home to change, I was already going to be late for my first day at school since I broke up with my boyfriend.
Liam
Honestly I don’t know why I was cold, I was wearing a t-shirt and a thermal jacket, but It was just really cold outside. So I rushed as fast as I could inside, not just because it was cold, but because I was going to be late for the student council meeting.
That’s when I ran into Alex, and mean literally I ran into her as we both tried to get into the door. “Oof! Oh, uh sorry I didn’t see you th-” she cut her sentence of when she saw me. “No, no sorry that’s my bad Alex. Here let me help you with your things” as I started to help her pick up her things, she stopped me.
“No, no, I’ve got it, you’re probably late for some kind of meeting” wow, it’s like she was reading my mind. And as I appreciated the kindness of this I was intent on making sure she had everything.
“You sure? Because I can help you, after all I’m the one who decides everything for the council, so they can’t start without me.”
“No I’ve got it, it’s fine just go to your meeting, I wouldn’t want you to be late.” well it seemed like she was pretty darn intent on making me not be late to my meeting. “Well okay, see you later then.” and this wasn’t a complete lie as I was probably going to see her again later today, for I had 3 classes with her.
Alex
Most of my friends wondered why I didn’t like Liam, don’t get me wrong he was nice, sweet, intelligent, and handsome, and now that I’m hearing it in my head, I have absolutely no clue why I don’t like him. I guess it’s because our interests are so vastly different, I’m artistic, always ready to try new things, and interested in basically any hobby or activity you could throw at me, plus I’m in volleyball and I am the lead cheerleader at football games.
Meanwhile Liam is pleased with his activities, does like to try new things but is picky about it, and not interested in as many things as me, plus he does football and student council, so he’s basically one of those perfect guys that you only hear about in movies or read about in books.
Except for one thing, he’s not blond and does not have blue eyes, he has wavy brown hair and the brightest, prettiest green eyes you’d ever seen. I know you must be thinking right now “are you sure you don’t like this guy?” and let me just tell you… I have never been more unsure about something in my entire life.
You see he’s extremely likeable and I have been known to flirt with him time to time, but it could never work out, our lives are just too different.
this ongoing book has been placed in a writing contest! vote for it so I can finish it and publish the whole story!
Hi, first paragraph, you mean 'than' rather than 'then'. How's that for a confusing sentence? Second paragraph: 'it' in the middle of the sentence does not need a capital letter. Third paragraph, you need a full stop after 'your things'. Then 'As I started to pick up her things...' As is written with a capital letter because this is a new sentence. Fourth paragraph same thing. After meeting, a full stop is required, then start the next sentence with a capital letter too. Further capital letters needed later, after quotation marks close. OK, enough of the punctuation commentary - the characters are great, and Alex's internal thoughts at the end of this chapter are a delight. We're not generally into pure romantic tales, so hope this story has a few twists along the way.