A.I Medina

Beautifully written

Hello Karla,

I owe you a review. I believe we swapped books a while back.

First, I will start out by saying that though your story is short, (at the time I wrote this), I enjoyed reading it. I like how you start of with the suspense and build up on it. Every chapter flows great leading to the next. I wish they could have done something worse to the monster, I am sure others feel the same, but it is your story.

Your method of describing the situations and adding intensity to it is marvelous. Poor Camille and everything she had to go through. When they reach the other world, beautiful descriptions. I am very interested to see how everything else turns out. Keep on writing! Great work! It has been a while since I have read something this good.

Here is your review

Hello,

Kudos for not making your story so long in chapters to read, as well as keeping some chapters short..

Some chapters read better than others, but I do like the way you write and express your characters feelings, emotions, and setting. The story develops a bit slow, it makes for a good read.

Great job on your book!

Good, but let's make it better.

Your story itself is great from beginning to end. There are a lot of drama moments and moments that make you think. Each character develops adding more interest to the story. The story starts out with a bang, and develops from hurt, pain, joy, and love, all in one.

I strongly recommend going back to edit your story. It does need some work. It is frustrating at times when things don't make sense due to grammar issues. If you fix those issues, it would make for a better read. I find myself wanting to make more corrections and edits than actually getting to enjoy the story. At times certain things feel out of order, but it is due to your structure. If you organize it better, it can really have that capturing tone.

I am sure if you dedicate some time to fix those issues, you can improve this story wonderfully. Great work! It takes guts to showcase your story. Please consider this as constructive criticism. I have been there before where you are at and have gone through that phase as well. If you follow through with what I and several others have stated, you will be a much better writer in the future.

Want to read more

I enjoyed reading your story. I hope you write more and fill us in on what happens next.

You are in for a great read!

Taylor,

As promised, here is your review.

You kept me wanting to read more every single chapter. I love the way you describe your character's actions. From the heartache, the pain, the betrayal, and everything in between, you make sure, we, as the reader can feel it. I like how you keep things flowing and everything makes sense. Erik is lost and confused about Caelynn's betrayal, and who wouldn't be. To start off this book with the betrayal and being locked in a prison I believe was the best way to go. Your writing style is fantastic. I like when I can feel the environment and character's actions. Like when Caelynn is hungry, to craving to have someone to talk to, but in the end, it turns out worst for her. I have really enjoyed your story and hope you write more chapters. Get this book published when you complete your story. I want an autographed copy. Don't forget to review my book. Cheers!

Is there more?

As promised, here it your review. You have something great here. Write some more to advance your story. You left me wondering what else is going to happen.

Your mix of dialogue with story is perfect. Not too long and not too short. Kudos and keep up the good work.

Powerful Story You Can Feel It!

Your story starts off with action developing into even more action and amazing scenes. You put much work into this world, your characters, and the situations they go through. I felt I was immersed in a time of gods and goddesses.

I was entertained by the gore scenes. Its add that extra specialty to make this story unique. I will not scold you for your grammar or punctuation as others have done, but do get those fixed. You need some spacing in longer paragraphs too. I have enjoyed reading your book. Great work!

Interesting FPPOV

At first I was a bit confused because I did not know why everything started the way it did. There is another book to read before this one to truly understand what is going on before the start. Within time, I got the story down. I like how it starts and develops. You add many sexy elements to your characters which make for an intriguing scene and read. If I can visualize it, you are doing a good job. I feel you express a lot through the dialogue. Perhaps more narration as to what is happening to keep the reader engaged. Characters are great by the way. Wickedly great.

Some paragraphs with dialogue feel long. The occasional swear words are okay every once in while. What's a good novel without some frustration on the side? You describe the first person perspective pretty good. Some scenes feel like blah, blah, blah, and not much going on. Keeping track of who said what gets confusing with so much dialogue. Not everyone will see it if they are not used to reading something like this. I do like how your characters have unique names and not something basic. Overall, you have something wonderful here.

Impressive story!

From beginning to end, this story is exciting, fast paced, and keeps you guessing just what the heck is going on. It seems trouble follows the MC constantly. Your writing style is impressive. I am happy to have read a work with hardly any grammatical, spelling errors, or others. Your technique to describe the characters, the bad people or aliens, and the shift of the worlds is beautiful. You go from one part of the story being normal, to the other part of the story that redefines what you thought was strange. How does one react to ending up in another planet? You describe it perfectly in each chapter along with everything that happens. Blood sucking aliens was a bit weird for me, but I like how you took that to the next level and defined something new for the genre. I have never heard of such beings with that ability. And towards the end, we find out that there is a part 2 to this story. Way to leave us in suspense!

I myself speak fluent Spanish and believe your story would read better if you add in the actual Spanish dialogue. It doesn't matter which region you choose, so long as you caption the translation. I think it would be more fun for readers. I greatly enjoyed your story. Though, it was a lengthy read, but it was worth it. I am happy we swapped stories. Have you ever thought about self-publishing this story or submitting it to an actual book publisher? Give it a shot! I recommend others to check out this story.

A Very Nice Children's story

As promised, here is your review.

Story starts out excellent. The atmosphere you put it in makes us think that it is going to stay in one place, but you develop it as you we read forward. I felt that there is too much dialogue in some chapters, as others you have written it perfect with minimum dialogue. That is of course my opinion. It sounds great in most chapters. The fantasy elements blend in nicely further into the chapters. Yours is the first children's story I have read on Inkitt. Since I have a 9 year old daughter, that is why I wanted to read this.. Overall, the story is peaceful and gentle making it a good read. Great job for this story!

Here is your review

This is a great story to read over a hot cup of coffee. Your characters are brought to life through their actions and dialogues. I felt a heartwarming nature throughout the entirety of your story. I like how you go into detail for the religions. I have Jewish friends and completely understand why they do certain things. I also don't eat pork. Your first chapter felt very long as your other chapters are smaller in size. I felt like I was watching a Netflix series when Joseph and Persephone engaged with each other. Overall, great read!

A Great Read!

Apologies for taking long to read your story, but here is your review.

I will start off by saying that you have written a very unique story. I love the amount of detail that goes into every chapter. We are taken into another world instantly and every page feels like an adventure. Your grammar is good, the story develops nicely, and I like to visualize things in my mind when reading. If I can see it happening like a movie, even better. I will admit, I thought Alanis would be annoying, but as I read more, I saw her development. Your book has a bit of everything, which makes it all the more worth while to read.

Congratulations on an awesome story!!

Very Interesting

I like your descriptions. Rich in detail. You set the setting, environment, and story well. These are the type of description I like to read. You can easily visualize it in your mind and see it playing out right in front of you.

I really wish you would write more. If you can make the other chapters just as good or even better, like this one, you will have an awesome book. Chapter 1 is really good. I have enjoyed reading it. Please write more!

Absolutely beautiful story!

I have not read such a touching and motivating story like this one. You dare go above and beyond, and you bring your characters to life with the many incidents that happen. I like how you express everything in order. The chapters you keep fairly short, but interesting. Every chapter is filled with that OMG moment or WOW, that makes you keep reading. I was never bored while reading.

If you can go back and edit this story, fix some grammar issues and others, you will have a perfect story. Space out your paragraphs to allow for a better read. Use Microsoft Word at home or online to help you with this. Spell Check your writing too. Some words are misspelled or used incorrectly. You can still understand the story, but it would read better.

I really enjoyed the depth of your writing. You go straight on to an issue that some may be afraid to write about. You are brave for making a book that deals with racism and addresses various issues within your plot. I would love to see your book in bookstores and in schools. I can actually see a movie being made from this book.

You get 5-stars from me! Great work on your story. Keep writing more stories. You have the talent!

Review Overdue

Remember me from a while back, we owe each other reviews!
Here is yours.

Your story is very intriguing. I like the Chinese aspect to it. I hope that is Chinese I read. The names of the characters are unique too. While you did state at the bottom of the chapters who they are and what do the names mean, it would be good to write out the translations to some of your dialogue also. You have a very interesting story, and I hope you develop more into it.

Cheers!

I have enjoyed reading this story

Your story is definitely out my of my usual zone, but I decided to read it anyways. Readers and writers can both learn many new things when we do this. As agreed, here is your review.

I will start of by saying that, while this story is long,. it is great to read. I felt as though there was always something happening throughout each page, which made it interesting to keep reading. We start out by knowing a little bit of details for each character, as they develop and progress throughout the story. The story flows smoothly and builds up. You describe the situations of your characters well. It must be tough for anyone with anxiety to go out and make friends.

The good thing is your main character did. I like how you did not just keep her shy, awkward, and showed us that any limitation can be broken. Just like in real life, someone with anxiety can fall in love and share many great times with friends and their special someone. Having anxiety does not mean you are a loner or someone who never wants to have friends.. It is an actual issue that affects many people. Hopefully, others who can relate to this will enjoy reading your story. The pen pal development makes it feel as it is another story within the story. I like that because you immerse it, making it fit nicely giving us more details.

I will not state the same as others have, as they have touched on what happened in some scenes or what is missing. I will include what I caught at a constant.

As stated before in some comments, your story would read better if you add more breaks in some paragraphs and after each person speaks. Some chapters feel very long and never ending. Perhaps break your chapters into two continuous chapters or shorten them to get to the main point of your chapter. It would flow much better. and read better too. Your writing is impressive. I can feel the dedication you put into your story to make it come to life. You let us feel how the characters feel.

To those of you who like teen drama and high school flings, this is your book. It was out of my comfort-zone, but like I said, one can always learn something new. Congratulations on a wonderful story!

Great read!

I owed you your review from a while back. Thank you for reviewing my book from before. As promised, here is YOUR review.

I like how you connect everything in your environment to make the story flow. You don't just make it about mystery and suspense, but there are also some parts that make you smile, laugh, and think. I was intrigued from the beginning to the end. When reading through the chapters, I often found myself imagining the scenario and trying to find out what could this or that be. I have enjoyed reading your work! Finish it because I am sure there are others who want to read more. Great work!

Intriguing!

Very interesting start. You build up the suspense nicely. I am curious as to why the jump from 1920 to 2020. I hope you write more to this story.

Read at night

As promised from my post, I am giving you a review, tis a bit overdue, but it is never too late.

I have enjoyed reading your story. I mostly read it at night since I would have more peace and quiet.

This is a different perspective of vampire and witch genre. I did not know a half-witch and half-vampire was even possible. Good mix however. I see that the vampires speak Bulgarian. I would have loved to see more translation of what they were saying, and interactions. Maybe some curse words or so towards our main character..

I really like how you make certain chapters stand out in detail. The way you describe the surroundings of what Leighton experiences is tough, sweet, and strange all in one.

It is very intriguing. That one surprise near the end was a big WOW moment. I will not spoil it for others, but definitely recommend to read and find out for themselves.. Great job and great story!

Friendly reminder, please review mine.

Intriguing

I like your writing and description style. I also like how you keep the chapters flowing as each is its own little surprise. I am curious to see how this story turns out and would like to read more.

Great story!! I would like to read more!

As stated, I will give you a review of your story.

Your characters are introduced well and the plot develops little by little. I like how descriptive you are in letting the reader know what the feelings and emotions are that the characters are going through, like when they growl or have that awareness.

If you can remove the numbers of words at the start of your chapters because it may cause certain readers to turn away as they may see it as too much to read. No book really contains the number of words on top. Rather, let the reader dwell into your story and even if it is 1,000 words or less, that is why we read. Our minds won't register the number of words regardless.

In one of your chapters, you state that you forgot to add in an attribute to your character, Arianna's shyness. I would recommend to take out that part completely and add in the shyness somewhere in the beginning to your story to fit. This way, we will know from the start how she is and the story flows and continues without interruption. You need to also capitalize the beginning of most of your sentences. If you write directly on Inkitt platform, copy your text to Microsoft Word and run a quick spell check. Or use another Word Processor to spell check there. Once complete, copy the text over back to Inkitt and this will at least help you with grammar and punctuation. Most important, save your work!

Overall, great story! I love how Arianna is finding out things and it is all a mystery as to why. Keep writing and finish this book! Cheers!

Super interesting from the start

I was hooked on how you started describing everything in great detail. I can imagine the settings and environment perfectly.. I've yet to finish your story, but I am fascinate by the way you make everything flow. and make sense.. Great story!