An English Story with Makoto Shinkai's Vibe
Have you watched Makoto Shinkai's movies? Because the atmosphere in the first chapter really reminds me of "5cm per Second", or probably "Your Name". But considering your profile picture, it seems that you like animes a lot.
Once I read that the setting was Japan, I just knew that this would turn to be so anime-like. To be honest, this 'anime-like atmosphere' almost made me not continue reading. Don't get me wrong, I do like anime and I did study Japanese for my major, I just know this style too much that sometimes I get bored, lol. Well, since I can speak Japanese, I want to correct the Japanese words you wrote.
In the second chapter, when Matt said 'calm down' in Japanese, I think 'ochitsuku' is not the right form. 'Ochitsuku' is the dictionary form which means 'to calm down', without any expression of telling someone to calm down. You should use 'ochitsuke' if Matt sounded a little rude, of 'ochitsuite' if you want him sound soft.
Anyway, the second chapter was interesting enough, though I don't really like Julie being kind of nosy and Matt being too rude in a way. (Like I said, so anime-like.)
I hope this short review helps :-) I'll check if you've posted the next chapter.
Regards,
Kei Angelus
Read the story now