LunasChild8

Canada

Just an aspiring writer who hopes to captivate readers' imaginations through my work.

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Call of "Cancer"

The title is what drew my attention to your story. Interesting first chapter you've got here. I'm quite curious to read the rest.

Are you Romanian, or do you just happen to speak Romanian? It was a pleasant surprise finding some of the language incorporated in your story.

Keep up the good work.

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Review from the Stars

Greetings Earthling,

This is a very beautiful poem that you have written, Steve Waldrop. The words you've used to describe the peaceful settings made your poem very pleasant to read. Thanks for sharing it here!

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"Disease" review

At first, you had me worried about this being a tragedy, but I was pleasantly proven wrong.

I absolutely loved this story, and the cute, tender moment between the Uchihas.

Well done!

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"The Phoenix King" review

Despite only having 2 chapters uploaded, they were more than enough to hook me into the story and wanting to find out more.

I admire your ability of describing the scenery and allowing the readers to visualize the environment. There were very well spelling errors, and your writing style makes your story a pleasure to read.

I highly recommend this novel to anyone who enjoys a good fantasy adventure story.

Well done!

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"Summoned" review

Here's my promised review.

The summary ignited my interest, and the fire kept on growing the more I've read. You've brought to life a believable story, expertly introducing the characters and their distinct personalities, creating fun and unique dynamics between each character, and describing the landscapes to allow the readers to visualize what the characters are seeing.

My only recommendation would be to add in the date or month at least at the beginning of each chapter, like you've done for some, to inform the readers of how much time had past.

There were very few spelling errors, so I commend you on a writing format that's easy to read.

Great work!

PS: When will you upload the sequel?

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A Diamond in the Rough

Just like I did for "Ultimatum", I'll offer my opinion on the chapters.

Chapter 1
-You need to stay consistent with the tense you want to use. It’s either past or present: it can’t be both.
-As I’ve mentioned in your other story, do take note to break the paragraphs according to their ideas so that it’s an easier read.
-I don’t understand how Brandon, being held in a police cell, was allowed to go back home.
-I assume that Chapter 1 was a dream?

Chapter 2
-Remember to pick a specific tense you want to write it.
-What a strange interaction between those two. Brandon is rather dramatic, and it seems like the girl can read minds.

Chapter 4
-I’m going to tell you what several people have told me in the past regarding my own work. Unless Brandon is writing in a journal, you shouldn’t have him addressing the readers at all, using “I bet you are wanting me to give you all the gushy details…”, etc… It’s rather bizarre.

Chapter 5
-It’s rather confusing how their minds are connected. To be honest, I’m at bit confused at the time frame. One moment Addison is giving Brandon a ride one, the next they’re at a wedding that apparently Brandon doesn’t remember meeting her at. Not to mention they’re acting rather calm about their connection.

Chapter 6
-…well, that escalated quickly. It’s confusing how and why Addison likes Brandon considering they barely know each other. It’d be great if you would develop that more.

Chapter 10
-You gave Addison a different last name than when the councilor first called her in. On that, interesting turn of events that offer some sort of explanation. Twins have remarked that they felt a deeper connection than with regular siblings. This is a good plot twist that if developed further would really grab the interest of more readers.

Chapter 11
-That’s quite a cliffhanger you’ve left the story with. It’d have been interesting to see the interaction between the twins and their mother.

All in all, this story has potential. What it needs is a good polish. Develop better the plot, the character interactions and their growth, and make the environment and timeline clear.

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Cloud 9

I first read "To Live Again" on fanfiction.net, and now finding it here on Inkitt reminded me of how much I love this story.

I was blown away by the details and passion that CJ_Wunderkind put into writing this story. I can't even imagine how much time it must have taken, but the love for this story can be felt through the words. I was hesitant at first to read "To Live Again", thinking that it was the typical modern-girl sent to Middle Earth type of story; I was pleasant proven wrong, and I couldn't stop reading.

CJ_Wunderkind beautifully portrayed the blossoming romance between Thranduil and Clara, and Clara's character development from starting out as a normal, but lost woman in a new world to a majestic and loving queen. Not just anyone could accomplish such a rewarding task.

Thanks so much for sharing your imagination and talent with us!

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Review from space

Hello Sarah.

I was disappointed when I realized that there were only 5 chapters. I'm looking forward to more, whenever you decide to upload them here.

I enjoy the fact that Draco, by however means possible, was given a chance to redeem his past. He and Hermione would have made excellent friends due to their intelligence had the whole "blood purity" issue been non-existent.

Your grammar was excellent, and the chapters were a good length, making them easier on the eyes to read.

Keep up the good work!

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Top 10% in Cult
Grand Novel Top 10%

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