Overall I enjoyed the story and I am not about to pick it to pieces. The Scene I think New England, and emphasis was given to the Fall, the colour of the leaves and the beauty of the Protagonist Hannah's environment. who a final year High School student was suddenly ejected into being an adult and acting like one which took courage and fortification in her actions and beliefs. The story line was interesting and I have to say that I have found myself thinking somewhat along the lines of human beings moving towards the greater destiny and good of all as in Winston Churchill.
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I think she projected a typical young person's dealings with classes, friends, jealousy, part time job etc and I think the writer had a good understanding of this.
It was when Ethan came on to the scene, that I started to wonder more of the impending plot and predicted dooms.
As well, I was and would have liked more of an understanding of why Father had to be removed at such a crucial, point, nor was it referred to. Did he know, was he asked to vacate his home, was he a minor official of Hleo, it seemed odd to me.
I think the writer jumped into an amazing psychic and even alchemical world, much like that of Secret Brotherhoods etc and fed it into the story. I found the justification of Ethan, describing the removal and murder of his colleages correct from his point of view but not from hers. I felt she took a glib attitude to it all, and not believable on her part that made the reader think also that the deaths were nothing and needed to be done.
Ryan, changed overnight to being an eligible date was confusing and that her feelings changed toward him. The lovely scene of the Gala, with descriptions of gowns and masks was delightful and it upset me that Adam, could have created such a scene to remove her unnoticed and that suddenly he became the villain.
The fight in the library I suppose was necessary, but the fact that Adam did not die led to asking other questions. We see the protagonist and Eltham declare their love for each other but I accept this with a but and the words, This is where the adventure begins or fun, I forget.
Does she finish school. What does her father say when he returns. Will he accept Ethan he wasn't crash hot about him earlier on. But a story has to end and it ended with excitement and the lead up was grabbing. Well done.