Paid For My Twin Sister's Crimes

ELSA'S POV

I am crying. I am anxious. I am looking like a child who has lost their favorite toy.

I have bitten all my nails on my right hand, and now I am attacking my left.

Why did I beg them to let me stay and watch? Stay here by her side? Why in the world did I believe this was a good idea? Why did I believe I could handle this?

I thought with my tumor, I would be the twin that dies first. But now, it seems like it will be the opposite.

I wanted to be here during this moment because it might be the last, so I insisted, demanded, to be let in. I had to change into personal protective equipment and sanitize my entire body before I was allowed into the operating theatre.

I thought I could handle it. I thought I could handle being in there with the medical experts and Gwen. However, what I saw the moment I went in there horrified and suffocated me.

My twin sister, Gwen, her face was so pale with no color in it at all. She looked so lifeless on that table. I couldn't even tell if she was breathing.

I remember the day when we found out about my tumor. The same illness that killed our mother.

I was seated on a hospital bed, and she was standing next to me. I had some very serious symptoms, and that made her immediately demand to take me to the hospital. After the doctor told us the results, she held my hand and looked me in the eye.

And then, she said, "Don't worry sister, I'll take care of you. Forever!"

Her eyes looked into mine, and they were gentle and loving. We were identical twins. Everything about us looked alike, except our eyes. I have green eyes while she has deep blue eyes that are so beautiful.

I love her eyes so much. God! It would be great if she would open her eyes and look at me now. I want her to look at me and roll her eyes and call me a crybaby for always crying about everything.

However, my Gwen, who was sleeping on the operating table, was not moving at all. Her nose and mouth were covered in tubes to maintain her body that was on the brink of death.

The doctors were sweating hard as they tried to save her life, trying to get the bullets out of her body, trying to stop the bleeding that was so much, her skin had turned as white as paper.

I listened to all kinds of noises coming from the machines, until finally, I could not take this kind of torment anymore.

I became scared.

I ran away from the operating theatre in fear.

My entire body is shaking right now as tears roll down my face. I feel this excruciating pain in my heart that just won't go away.

I am leaning against the wall, trembling like a leaf on a feeble branch against a strong wind, as my eyes are staring at the light of the operating theatre that is still on, praying hard it doesn't go off. Because I know what that will mean.