The Lovers

I never believed anything like this would happen to me, getting married to a man i never knew in my life, but being thrown out by my true love.

My mother was fixated on my hair as I was biting my nails before I felt my mothers hand slap my own hand away from my mouth.

"Stop it, your aunt spent as lot of time to make sure your nails didn't look like they don't have your teeth marks on them" she said.

I looked down at my nails, they did look fine, longer than I would like. "I don't want to be here mama..."

She tisked and finished putting up my hair, "and what? you think going to a community collage not knowing what you want to do is going to help you out?"

I turned to her, "i never said that..."

"Then what then?" She said turning me back towards the mirror Infront of me.

I held back my tears and responded, "Anything but this..." I held her hand on my shoulder.

She sighed as i see a wave of understanding and worry wash over her face.

"Vanessa..." she starts, not knowing where to go from there, "You know all we want for you is to have a good life, an easy life, and I know this isn't that, but... Nicolas is a good man, a man that wont expect much from you. Please, for the sake of our family, for his family, please be the wife everyone knows you can be."

I felt more tears pricking the sides of my eyes, I never wanted to get married to anyone, never be a house wife. I wanted to yell at my mother, saying this isn't the way, for our families to not go bankrupt. But my throat went dry, like there was thorns around my throat preventing me from speaking. All I did was nod as my mother breathed a sigh of relief. she kissed the top of my head before I heard my dad call for her, she left me in the room, as i looked at myself. I looked down at the vanity stand, makeup the makeup artist left so i could touch up. My small notebook I used to use for sketches or doodling, now filled with generic vows i barely knew about the man I was to marry. and finally my bouquet, Nicolae's supposed favorites white roses, and my favorites, purple lily's and sunflowers. For a second I forgot about everything around me as I held my bouquet of followers, seeing how beautiful the flowers looked with each other, almost a perfect mix.

Then I heard a knock, I cleared my throat and wiped my eyes as I responded, "Come in!"

To my surprise my bridesmaid and best friend walked in, "You okay Vess?"

I sighed looking down at myself, "As okay as I can be"

She smiled softly, leaning on the vanity in her sleek purple dress, she always looked beautiful. "If it makes you feel any better, the guys hella hot, a good mix of tired but angry" She said with a chuckle. I sighed and looked down a bit, not masking a smile like I was for my mom. Her smile faded, "sorry, just.. trying to cheer you up..."

I looked up at her, "What are you doing here Jaycee?"

She rubbed the back of her neck before responding, "Just, thought.. I could make you smile, at least a little bit before I cant anymore..."

I responded to her, "I'm not going to die you know" I smiled.

she smiled back, "I know I know, just... don't know when's the next time were going to see each other after you become a rich housewife."

My smile faded a bit, I couldn't imagine what she must feel, how much shell be losing without me around. Especially since I was living her dream, getting married and she was just the bridesmaid.

I stood up from my seat and went over and hugged her from the side, while the mirror was Infront of us. "Ill be there for you, when out get married, even if you become a mother, you'll be a better wife than I could ever be"

We stood there looking at ourselves in the mirror, before she spoke, "You'll always be that softie little girl in my eyes you know that?"

I looked over and smiled at her, "I couldn't be happier"

We both giggled before I heard my father called me, and we were snapped out of our little world. Jaycee went over and opened the door to him.

"Its time, they're ready for you." he said with a smile.

—--

And there they were, standing up as soon as my father opened the church doors. My family, and my soon to be family, all standing, watching me, I always wanted to be to everyone’s attention one day, in my mothers white dress, not like this though.

My father lifted my head up from my shoes gently, smiling at me. I smiled back as I held onto his arm as we began walking down the aisle, I could barely stand to look at my soon to be husband, looking at the people around me.

My grand meme, and my mother, smiling softly at me, as I tried to smile, but I felt somewhat haunted. I continued to hold onto my fathers arm for dear life as he rubbed the top of my hand trying to ease some of the tension I had, but it was no use, I was still so shaky.

My eyes were fogging up, my hands were shaky, and more slowly I could feel my fathers arm slipping away, I tried to hang on, I really tried, but as soon as i felt him let go I couldn’t help but feel like that same sensitive little girl I tried so hard not to be. I hated this, I hated being this helpless, this defenseless.

Then, in an instant, I felt a hand, holding my own, I looked up, It was my husband to be, before I could pull away, I just kept it there. It wasn’t a romantic gesture but it was just a way of comfort. I just kept looking down at our hands as the priest continued to speak, all I could think of was my bland written lines I had for him, about what is he actually like behind closed doors rather than what I’ve heard.

With that I felt a squeeze on my hand as I looked up, his stone cold face and piercing brown eyes looking at me, as everyone’s eyes were on me now, right, Vows…

I swallowed before I took my little note pad out and flipped a couple of pages, and started, “My dear Nicolas, it has only been a few days since we have been scheduled to marry, but I find myself so happy to be at this altar to marry you. To be here standing with you to unite our families, and share the rest of our lives together.” It was the worst improv I came up with, but it was the longest I had before, god I couldn’t even remember his name, could he remember mine?

The priest turned to him, and nodded, as he took out a piece of paper, not holding my hand anymore. His voice was cold, and direct, “My dearest Vanessa, only now I see your face in front of me but yet it seems I’ve known you my whole life. I wish to make you the happiest wife and wish to be a good working man as well.” Then he put his paper away, going back to holding both of my hands, looking at me, still with that same cold stare.

His vows were shorter than mine, yet they seem more meaningful than I could ever make mine, even for being this cold individual, he seemed to be a true gentleman at heart. As the pastor kept speaking, I couldn’t help but look at him now, not just down at my shoes and keep being mousy.

He was a head taller than me, and seemed very strong and built, but at a contrast, he looked tired, no wonder he looked so pissed and cold, I would be too if I was that tired. His jet black hair was slicked back, and it almost looked like he was clean shaven, but there was a hint of stubble on his face. The stubble suited him more than his clean face did, which I found a bit endearing in a way, or at least I was trying to look for the positives in this situation.

“Do you, Vanessa Cawthon Take Nicolas Reeves, as your lawfully wedded husband?” The priest said cutting my thoughts short, as I got nervous again.

“Oh, I-I do” I finally responded, feeling embarrassed, but more importantly, that felt like the final straw, like after I said that, there was no going back.

The priest turned to him, “And do you, Nicolas Reeves, Take Vanessa as your lawfully wedded Wife?”

Before he responded, he looked at me, in the eyes, “I do” he said with his cold expression and cold, but he still held my hand, not gripping it, still just a gesture of calmness.

The priest then smiled, and finished, “And by the power vested in me, I pronounce you, husband and wife, you may kiss.”

I had completely forgotten we had to kiss, I was once again, worried, and was about to start shaking, before my husband pulled in and held me by my back, and gave me just a quick peck on my lips before pulling away. I was still standing, stunned, while everyone cheered, as long as it was over I suppose.

—----

As I saw everyone dancing I was somewhat longingly looking out at the reception from my table. I was holding my bouquet under the table on my lap, just looking down at it. I lifted my head slightly looking up and over at my husband in his small pocket on his black tux. I took one of his favorite flowers out of my bouquet, and put it in his small pocket.

He didn’t react, he just looked over at what I was doing, and when I was done he just looked at me with his resting cold expression.

I was silent for a second, not knowing what to say, “it just looked, empty is all, and my mother said you liked these so… yeah.” God I was so awkward.

He just took a soft breath, “Thank you” He said, now looking down at his flower, he was pretty cute, at least when he’s not looking directly at you.

Before I could say anything more his mother came over to him, as his expression hardened even harder as she said something to him in a language that I didn’t understand. He just nodded and looked over at me, his expression going back to his relaxed cold one.

He started, “We’ll have to dance after this song.”

I nodded, “Just us and then our parents?” I asked

He sighed and nodded.

As the long song ended, he stood up, a hand reaching out for me, I fiddled a bit trying to put down my bouquet and pull up the bottom of my dress from under the table as I took his hand. He held my hand as we went to the dance floor, a foreign song started playing as I held his hand and the other rested on his shoulder. His other hand rested on my waist as he looked down, trying to coordinate the rhythm in the way he moved. I looked at him, as he eventually looked at me.

“What's wrong?” he said quietly.

I responded back quietly “I just hardly know anything about you, and it just feels weird… I don’t know if you know more about me but…” I sighed, I couldn’t think of any way to make my words more shortened or simpler.

He hummed, thinking, after a second he whispered, “well what do you want to know about me?”

I looked up at him, a bit shocked but, nonetheless this kind of was the perfect moment to get to know him more before we went on our honeymoon.

I whispered, “well, for starters how old are you?”

“They didn’t even tell you that?” he said quietly, a bit of joking and teasing in his cold voice.

I got embarrassed before he continued, “I’m 31, 6 years older than you, and before you ask, or if you even know, I’m Latin, my family is from Spain.”

I nodded slightly, it did make sense, “what about you?” he asked, “I feel like I know some things about you, but do you want me to know about anything?”

Oh right! I completely forgot he didn’t know me either, I was so focused on myself I didn’t even realize he was in the same boat as I was. “Oh right” I started, “I’m actually not that interesting, Im pretty young but my mother says I have the heart of an old woman.”

I saw a creep of a smile on his face as he let out a breath of air in humor, “how so?” he asked.

I couldn’t help but feel more relaxed seeing his less cold demeanor, “I always have to have a blanket, I love to drink only tea and I carry around purses of butterscotch.”

He smiled, genuinely, not trying to hide one anymore, he smiled so fondly that I flushed, a bit with embarrassment but at the same time, a wave of content.

For the first time in months, I felt like I was going to be okay.