Chapter 1 - Do you want to stay a virgin?
Katherine ‘Kat’ Hartford
“Hey, how’s your love life?” Morgan is laying on her bed and glances from her phone to me.
I sit down on my bed opposite hers and straighten the pink skirt over my knees. Furrowing my brow, I wonder how to answer the question. How do you tell your college roommate, that you’ve known for less than a week, that you don’t have a love life?
Morgan puts down the phone and sits up. “Was that too forward? I have a tendency to butt in where I’m not wanted.”
“I don’t mind.” I push a strand of my light brown hair behind my ear. “It’s just.... pretty much non-existent.”
“Good, after all, we just arrived at the perfect place to pick up guys.”
I blush a little, painfully aware that I have never in my life picked up a guy. My parents would have turned catholic and sent me to a nunnery if they even suspected me of doing that. But for the first time ever, my parents aren’t around to monitor everything I do.
“Oh?” I try not to let my inexperience show.
“You must have noticed every guy on campus checking you out. You have that innocent, doe-eyed look that makes them want to protect you.”
My new roommate, Morgaine ‘Morgan’ Roberts, is the complete opposite of me. She has long black hair, confidence that I thought was a myth until I saw her, and she is fierce. We’ve only just gotten to know each other, but I can already tell she’s super smart and independent.
Meanwhile, I’ve never been allowed to even cut my hair without my parents’ approval. It’s a miracle that I’m even here.
“Do you have a boyfriend?” I ask. I don’t bother telling her that I’m sick and tired of being protected. All my life I’ve been protected, and looking at Morgan, I’m not so sure that’s a good thing.
“Not yet,” she smiles a devilish smile. “But I have my eyes on someone.”
“Is he in your class?”
There’s a knock at our door.
“Take it from me,” Morgan says as she gets up to answer it, “you don’t want to mess around with someone too close. Then you’ll be stuck with them for the next four years. Pick someone you can avoid if things go south.” She opens the door before I can answer her and I sigh.
“Who are you?” the man outside says and squints suspiciously at Morgan. His hair is slightly darker than mine and he got whatever height I’m lacking. He’s a bit over six feet to my five foot two. And even I can tell he’s attractive. With his brown eyes and similar full lips to mine.
“Who’s asking?” Morgan leans against the door frame and crosses her arms, nonchalant as ever.
“Morgan.” I get up. “This is my brother, JD. He’s the captain of the hockey team.”
“Brother, huh?” She runs her eyes up and down him slowly, then she takes a deep breath and turns away from him. “Too close,” she says at me with a wink and lies back down on her bed and picks up her phone.
“What are you doing here?” I ask my brother.
He scans the room, still with that suspicious look on his face. “Just making sure you’re settled.”
“Mom called you, didn’t she? Did she ask you to check up on me?”
He shrugs and peaks behind the door as he comes in. “I just want to make sure you’re not up to something.... stupid.”
Morgan raises an eyebrow at me.
“Stupid like what?” I ask.
“You know.”
I almost think he’s going to check the closet, or maybe under my bed.
“No, I don’t know.” I cross my arms in front of me. “Have you forgotten I’m an adult and can make my own decisions?”
He grins at me and ruffles my hair. “Whatever you say, little one.”
He’s such an ass.
“Was there anything else, or do you have enough to report back to mom?”
JD walks over to my desk. It’s covered in books and papers. Most of them are textbooks, but I hold my breath as he picks up the romance novel I’ve been reading.
There’s no way to explain this away. The cover features a naked woman with her hands tied behind her back. He frowns at it for a while before he grimaces.
“Do you really think it’s appropriate to leave this lying around?” he says in an annoyed tone and tosses the book to Morgan.
She picks it up and looks at it. My heart is beating so fast it must be filling the room. I’ve only known her a few days and there is no reason she would cover for me. Especially not when my brother is staring daggers at her.
“What? You think a book cover is going to ruin your sister?” She puts the book on her nightstand and blinks at JD.
“Just keep it in your pants,” he says.
“Mm-hmm.” Morgan bites her lip, and I swear she’s teasing him.
He shakes his head before turning back to me.
“Thanks for checking up on me,” I say and usher him towards the door. “Let’s do it again in a few weeks. Or months.”
“I’ll let them know you’re alive and not in a cult yet.” JD walks away and raises a hand without turning back.
I close the door.
“So, that’s your brother?” Morgan asks. She’s sitting on her bed, hugging her knees.
I grimace. “He still thinks of me as the little sister he needs to protect.”
“He’s very controlling.”
I almost tell her she should meet my parents. Instead, I pick up the book from her nightstand. “Thanks for this.”
“No problem. Why does he act like he thinks you’re a virgin or something? Are your parents really that strict?”
I clear my throat and avoid looking at her. “In a way.”
“Wait.” She moves closer to me, sitting on her heels. “Are you a virgin?”
My face turns red, and I busy myself putting the book away in a drawer.
“You are.” She sounds fascinated, as if I’m some rare animal or something.
“I just never had the opportunity.”
She gestures to the book. “But you’ve been thinking about it?”
“I think JD would freak out if he even suspected I’ve been doing that much.” I try to laugh.
“You know you’re allowed to do more than think.”
“I know.”
“Do you? Because you’re blushing as if there’s something wrong with talking about sex.”
She’s right. Growing up, sex was never a topic my parents brought up. With me. I’m pretty sure they handed JD a pack of condoms and told him to not get anyone pregnant. The double standard was something it didn’t take me long to notice.
“Do you want to have sex?” Morgan leans forward.
“I... I don’t have a boyfriend.”
“That’s never stopped me. Listen, if you want to remain a virgin, go ahead. You do you. But tell me now, so I know to keep the fuckboys away from you.”
I bite my lip. “I think I was ready to lose my virginity over a year ago.”
“Are you just waiting for the right one? I get it, you have to feel comfortable. Or at least turned on by the guy.”
This woman is sitting here, talking so openly about matters that I have never discussed with anyone before, ever.
Sitting on my bed, I wonder if this is what it’s like to have a proper friend. I’ve had friends before. But over the years, my parents seemed to always find fault with them and convince me it was in my best interest to stop hanging out with the girls I liked.
They’d introduce me to girls they approved of. Which often meant they were daughters of their friends, and I never clicked with any of them.
This could be my chance to make a friend my parents can’t kick out of my life.
“I tried to do it once.” I straighten my skirt and clasp my hands.
“What happened?”
“He was my boyfriend for over two years. Then, about eight months ago, I drove two towns over to buy condoms and arranged to have him over on a night my parents were out. He was a good boy. I met him at a church function.”
“He didn’t want to go through with it?”
“No, he did.” I still cringe at the events of that night. “I led him up to my bedroom, and we were kissing and... then my parents burst in.”
“Shit.”
“Yeah. It wasn’t good. They never let me be alone with a boy again.”
“Wait, eight months ago? How old were you?”
I wince. “I had just turned eighteen.”
Morgan shakes her head. “And they still didn’t trust you to make that decision?”
“Of course not. They expect me to remain a virgin until I get married.”
“I can’t even imagine what it’s like growing up like that.”
“Were your parents not... like that?” I feel like I already know the answer. I met her parents briefly when we moved in, and they seemed so relaxed around her.
“No way,” she laughs. “I got the talk when I was thirteen and told them about my first crush. Ever since, my dad will bring me articles about sex and dating. My mom has had more than one talk with me about female orgasms and making sure to tell the guy exactly what I like in bed.”
My cheeks flush. I can’t even imagine saying the word sex around my parents. Let alone talking about enjoying it.
“Thirteen. That’s young.”
“Oh, I didn’t have my first time until I was sixteen.” She looks off into the distance and smiles. “God, that was a massive fuck up.” She laughs. “Neither of us knew what we were doing, and it was over in a few strokes. But it got better.”
“Was it bad?”
She tilts her head. “Not exactly bad, just inexperienced. We tried a few more times, and it did get better. Sometimes you just need to practice.”
I nod slowly and can feel nerves taking over.
She leans over and pats my knee. “Don’t worry. You can ask me anything. And I’ll help you find someone to do it with. There are plenty of eligible bachelors here at UNI. We just have to track them down.”
My eyes light up. “Could we go to a party? I’ve always wanted to go. To a college party, I mean.”
“Sure. The University of North Ironside has some of the best frat parties. Let me just find out where the place to be is.”
