Loser's Love

(Flower.)

“You’re going to love it here, Flower !”

Said my mother. How could I love this school... I don’t know a single thing about it. She really think I’ll conquer this place at first day ?

It was cold today. The way of cold, who makes your fingers hurt, and your eyes water. At least, that’s what I felt when I got out of the car.

“By the gods...”

I look around. My second home, for the next 4 years; I glance at the flyer that I received : “Welcome to your new life, shining star !”

“Shining star...”

I mutter with a sigh. I take a deep breath, promise of a fresh and new start, and push the heavy doors. The hallways were a labyrinth of students and lockers. Everywhere, people were chatting, laughing... I feel like a little leaf in a big river, carried by the movements of everyone around. My heart starts to thump with anticipation, nervousness and excitement. The way my mother talked about the school, it’s almost like she knew something I didn’t...

“C’mon, you can do it...You can do it.”

I repeat, like a mantra to ease my anxiety. My eyes scan the room, trying to see if I know someone, anyone. But no. Everyone was unfamiliar... I clench my schedule tightly, and take a peek at it.

“English. I like English, I’m good at it. Okay.”

The classroom was a few feet away, and I walk faster. Inside, I take a seat, in the middle. Basic, simple. Not too in front, but not too much in the back. Now that I’m at my place I start to get comfortable. I put my supplies on the desk, and look at my seatmate. A girl, who seems overly confident. Great. Really great. I decide to look at the others, to see if someone seems kind enough to befriend them. That’s when I spot someone watching me. He have shaggy hair that looks like it hadn’t seen a brush since a very long time, and thick black glasses. His skin is pale, like it never saw the sun of it’s entire life. He was the very epitome of what I would call a “nerd”. The way he looks at me makes me kind of...uneasy.

“Why does he stares...” I think, before turning back to face the whiteboard.

I try to focus on the teacher lesson, but it’s hard. This boy...I feel like he’s staring again. I glance towards him for the second time. His pupils are dilated with an intensity I never saw before. Like he’s trying to memorize something. I swallow hard, glancing back at the teacher. I’m probably imagining things, or he’s really weird and I’ll have to stay away...

The bell rings. Finally. I get up quickly, packing my things. As I reach the doorframe, I take a last look at him. He’s muttering, while reading his book...I shake softly my head, and leave class.

With every beat of his heart, he felt more and more alive. He found her, the one who’ll make his life complete. She’ll have to notice him. By every way.

All the morning, I had the impression that someone was following me. Each time I looked over my shoulder, a glimpse of brown disappeared into the shadows. The same brown of his hair. I sigh.

“Flower, just your imagination. Just...your imagination.”

Someone bumps into me, and I gasp of surprise. Was it him ? Or someone else ? I turn slowly to see a tall boy, way taller than me. He smiles at me, his lips piercings shining.

“Ah, I’m sorry. I mean, you’re so small I didn’t see you !”

He chuckles. I look at him, and I don’t know if I should get offended or not. Seeing my face, he immediately stops.

“Ahem. I mean...I was trying to...anyways. I’m sorry for bumping into you, uh...”

“Flower. My name is Flower...”

The boy nods, and grin.

“Great. Mine’s Levi, it’s a pleasure to meet you, Flower. I hope seeing you around !”

He winks at me, and walk away. He seems kind, actually. Not like a typical popular boy...Maybe I could be friend with him. But, my thoughts are interrupted by my stomach growling. After all, it’s lunch, so... I should find a place to eat. I walk outside, to join the cafeteria; but my instinct tells me to go somewhere else. The garden...

I sit on the bench, and take a book. A romance book, and as I eat my sandwich from my lunchbox, I hear leaves rustling behind me.

“W-who’s there ?”

I exclaim, a bit more shakily than intended. I see the boy from earlier. The nerd of English class...

“Hi, uh... I saw you reading. Is...Is that good ?”

He said meekly, stammering over his words. He gesture vaguely at my book, and I raise an eyebrow.

“Yes. It’s a good book...It makes me feel less alone.”

I say politely, but truthfully. He reajust his thick glasses, and looks at me.

“Alone ? I can understand, it’s...it’s my first day too. You probably don’t know anybody, like me...Everything is so loud and overwhelming, like a badly optimized MMO.”

I seem puzzled, and as he notices, he makes a grimace.

“S-sorry. I mean, it’s really too much for me.”

Maybe he just search a friend... and he don’t know a lot about it ? I take a closer look. His clothes are dirty and seems old...Poor one.

“It’s too much for me too. Uh...My name is Flower, also.”

His eyes widen as I introduce myself, and he clear his throat, shaking softly.

“Mine’s Fluo.”

He stumbles as he tries to come closer.

“S-sorry. I was saying my name is Fluo. No, a nickname. LIke fluorescent, but without the “res”.

He ajusts again his glasses.

“My real name...isn’t really...the most interesting.”