1| Happy Birthday
R Y S A
โMaa, itni badi party kyun rakhi hai? Itna taam jhaam nahi pasand mujhe, aapko pata hai na. Papa ke aadhe doston ko main nahi jaanti, hamare aadhe rishtedaaro ko nahi jaanti. Almost kisi ko nahi jaanti main. Fir ye sab ka kya fayda.โ I question my mother, who sits on my bed calmly, observing me as I pace across my room, panicking.
(Mom, why have you organised such a grand party? You know I donโt enjoy all this, donโt you? I donโt know half of Papaโs friends, I donโt know half of our relatives. I donโt know almost anyone. Then whatโs the point of all this.)
Itโs my eighteenth birthday today. Thatโs right. I am finally legal to do all the illegal shits I have always wanted to do. I am finally eligible to go to London, to my dream college, for my bachelorโs degree. Though, I am not gonna go overboard of course. I will keep myself in check.
Or at least thatโs what I am convincing myself.
The deep, dark fantasies of my inner beast are barely in my control anymore. Every now and then, the cravings heighten and till now I have done a great job at hiding it and keeping it in control, but I canโt say how long Iโll be able to do it.
Now that I have turned eighteen, itโs like nothing will be able to stop me now. Age, which by the way is just a number- says my friend who fucked her thirty two year old dadโs best friend when she was almost eighteen- can also not stop me now.
โAre you going to calm down?โ My motherโs voice snaps me out of my thoughts and I remember why I am freaking out.
Apparently, my parents have decided to organise a grand party for the celebration of their daughterโs eighteen birthday and to introduce her to society. My dad- stepdad- has literally called the entire city of Delhi and every elite businessman from across the country, and our relatives to the party.
You might think itโs normal and nothing big. Maybe thatโs the case for you, but I am a big ass introvert. You simply cannot expect me to go out, socialise with people, make friends. I am too awkward for that shit. What makes it worse is my โkeinchi jaisi zubaanโ.
Thatโs what my mom calls it. I simply donโt have any control over my tongue the moment someone says anything which doesnโt align with my point of view. I especially cannot control myself from slaughtering a man alive with my tongue when he thinks he can talk to or about a woman anyway he wants.
They need to be shown their place.
Men, I mean.
โItna panic kyun kr rhi ho, ek party hi to hai. Dress up, cut the cake, smile for some family photos, aur fir chali aana room mein wapis. Nooneโs going to murder you.โ Thatโs what she has to say to calm me down.
(Why are you panicking so much? Dress up, cut the cake, smile for some family photos, and then come back to your room.)
I canโt deal with my mom at times. Seriously. Itโs easy for her to say because she has always been the extrovert type. Queen Bee at school, the Miss Popular in college and everything that falls between popular and the queen for her entire life. But I am not that.
Trust me, I am not complaining.
I never want to be that. I am better off being the pretty, mysterious, nerd, who everyone wants to figure out but simply canโt. Thatโs a different kind of power in itself. I have seen the looks I get from everyone when I walk through the corridors of my high school. I can see how much they wish to open me and see what I hide inside, how they wish to touch me, have me, but simply cannot. Because thatโs who I am.
Untouchable.
Desired by all, touched by none.
I like that.
โItna aasan nahi hai, maa. Ye saare logโ mujhe ghutan hoti hai inke beech.โ
(Itโs not that easy, mom. All these peopleโ I feel suffocated among them)
โTo wapis aa jaana jab ghutne lage. You know Viraaj will never force you, right? Wo to bas chahte hai ki tum khush raho. Ye party bhi isiliye rakhi hai unhone, ri. He thought tumhe pasand aayega.โ
โMaa, aisa nahi hai ki mujhe pasand nahi unko khush dekhna, ya party karna. Mujhe bas itne anjaane logon ke beech rehna pasand nahi. But koi ni, agar dad chahte hai and itne pyaar se organise kiya hai to main aa jaungi.โ
(Then come back to your room when it starts suffocating. You know Viraaj will never force you, right? He just wants you to always be happy. Thatโs why he has organised this party. He thought youโd like it, Ri.)
(Mom, itโs not that I donโt want dad to be happy, or that I donโt enjoy parties. I just donโt like staying between so many strangers. But itโs okay, if dad wants this and he has organised it with so much love, Iโd be there.)
โThatโs the spirit. I knew you were gonna love it, sweetheart.โ A manโs voice grabs our attention and we turn around to find Viraaj- my stepdad- entering the room with a big grin on his face.
A smile makes its way automatically on my lips as he engulfs me in a small hug. I hug him back before he pulls away. I am actually very happy that mom found him after staying lonely for so long.
Viraaj and mom got married when I was twelve, eight months after their first meet, well not exactly. They have been a part of this high society since as long as they remember but they never officially met each other. When they did, they hit it off almost immediately and decided to get married.
Viraajโs first wife died young and after that, he stayed single, not rushing to find another person to fill the void. As for mom, my father cheated on her multiple times with multiple women until she found out one night and left him. There is no explanation for cheating, she says.
I have been taught that since a very young age and I abide by it. Consensually, I can excuse everything but when you are deceiving someone, thatโs straight up bullshit. I hate it with everything in me.
But I donโt really hate my father. He might be the worst husband alive, and trust me, Iโm glad my mom left him. But he has been a great dad to me. Since I was a kid, he has fulfilled every wish of mine. He is always the first one to wish me Happy Birthday and gets me the best presents. He makes sure I get to do and choose whatever I want in my life. He never stops me from anything.
โHappy birthday, beta. I cannot wait for you to meet all the guests. They need to be aware of my beautiful wife and sweet daughter. I am sure everyoneโs gonna be jealous. Like so jealous.โ He dramatically expresses, making my momโs smile turn into a full fledged grin, followed by a hearty laugh.
I smile at the two of them and feel so glad that they found each other. They deserve it.
โOkay, okay, enough of all this. We need to get ready for the party. We donโt have much time.โ Mom gets up and straightens the fabric of her dress. โLetโs go, hun.โ
I shake my head and turn towards the mirror to fix my kurti as they make their way towards the door. The brown sleeveless kurti clings to my body, hugging my curves in all the right places. I love how pretty these desi outfits make me feel. The kajal makes my eyes look mystical and the light red lipstick makes my lips appear freshly kissed.
โRi, aap maid ki help kr doge aapke bagal wala room ready karne mein?โ I hear Viraajโs voice and turn again to face them.
(Ri, can you help the maid prepare the room next to yours?)
A frown makes its way on my forehead almost immediately, hearing his demand. Not because I wouldnโt like helping the maid but because the room next to mine has never once been opened since I have moved here. Noone goes inside of that room and I have been asked to always stay away from it.
โKar dungi par aaj kyun? I mean, it has been locked for so long, to aise achanakโ
โHaan, wo actually Veer aa raha hai to usne kaha hai uska room ready rakhne ke liye.โ
***********
To say I have been nervous the entire day would be an understatement, because I have been shivering and palpitating. My body has practically stopped functioning and my brain seems to be stuck in a jam and has no plan to come out of it.
Veer Sehgal, Viraaj Sehgalโs eldest and only son, happens to be my stepbrother, who I have never met once in my entire life but heard a great deal. He was born from Viraajโs first wife and his mother died while giving birth to him. At the age of ten, he was sent to a boarding school in Russia and ever since then, he has been there.
He is eight years elder to me and has finished his masterโs degree in business recently. Now he is working at the Russian branch of the company owned by Viraaj. From what Iโve heard from mom, heโs handling that branch now.
Quite frankly, I donโt give two flying fucks about his existence. The only problem is, why is he coming back? Why now of all times?
His reputation precedes him and mom has always told me to keep a distance from him. He is bad news. Her words not mine. And no, my mother isnโt the typical evil stepmom. She is sweet. Itโs just that she is very protective of me and doesnโt want me to dangle my feet in any danger.
And as long as I am here, thereโs no way in hell am I going to create any problem for my mother. She isnโt going to worry because of me and Iโll make sure of it. If staying away from Veer makes it happen, then so be it. I donโt need to make myself comfortable around my stepbrother anyway.
I lift my eyes to stare at my reflection in the mirror and a smile touches my lips. My eyes take in the sight of me in the mirror and fuck itโs so satisfying. The red net saree is draped around my body perfectly, hugging me curves in every right place and showing enough for the hungry eyes to desire but not have. It has dark red roses on the border and goes perfectly with the sleeveless blouse.
Parts of the saree barely hide my deep cleavage. I lower it and fox it a little until I am satisfied with how it looks. My eyes stop on the mole right above my left breast and I smile to myself. Itโs one of my hottest features and I love showing it off everytime I can.
A simple diamond necklace hangs around my neck, with matching diamond earrings to complete the look. I have let my naturally straight hair loose and push some strands behind my left ear.
I have decided to keep the makeup light because my outfit is already loud enough to have the attention of the entire room. Reapplying my mascara and nude brown lipstick with a hint of red, I fix every little detail of my outfit and hair before exiting the room.
Itโs gonna be fun.
Thatโs what I chant to myself even though I am not sure how fun itโs actually gonna be. I donโt really think I believe that crap anyway.
The party is going on in full swing and I doubt if anyone is even interested in meeting the birthday girl or not. I make my way to the top of the stairs and stand there, waiting for mom to come escort me. I left her a text five minutes ago. Where the hell is she?
My senses heighten as the fight or flight hormones activate inside of me. I am already so bad at handling a crowd and with mom gone, there is no way I am gonna be able to handle the nervousness.
Just when I think I am going to give up, my mother finally arrives, fixing the plates of her own saree. Itโs golden, but not the tacky kind. On her the colour looks regal and the diamond necklace only enhances the look more. She smiles at me apologetically and I purposely roll my eyes at her, feigning anger.
โI am so sorry, sweetheart. Come on, letโs go, Viraaj must be waiting.โ She takes the lead and I follow right behind her, pulling the free strands of my hair behind my ear.
In no time, I find all the eyes on me and my heartbeats start racing on their own. You can do this, Rysa. I chant the mantra to myself but I am not really sure it helps.
โSmile, Rysa, everyoneโs looking at us.โ I hear momโs voice as she smiles at the crowd in the hall.
I put on my fakest smile and give it to every face which comes in my view. Whatโs the point of all this bullshit anyway? But I have got to do this for them.
I feel something in my arm and find my mom nudging at it subtly and she motions for me to see something, โLook, thatโs Veer.โ Her gaze is pointed straight and I follow it.
My eyes stop on a man standing beside dad, staring right at me with an unreadable expression. The moment our gazes meet, I feel the world stopping around us. Everything blurs around and the only one on whom my orbs focus is the man with dark brown eyes, jet black hair, sharp jaw and perfect features that can easily fail any male model.
He is tall, not too bulky, not too lean, with striking features that are enough to steal your breath away. I have seen guys, but he definitely stands out in any crowd he is a part of.
He tilts his head slightly and scans me from head to toe, taking in every last bit of me as if he is trying to save the image in his head. I find his gaze stopping at places for longer than a bit before they come back to stare at mine. For some reason, I feel compelled to look in his beautiful orbs, as if I simply canโt look away even if I want to, and he doesnโt show any interest in breaking eye contact either.
โThere she is, ladies and gentlemen. The birthday girl, my sweet angel, Rysa.โ Dadโs voice pulls me out of my thoughts and I break the burning eye contact.
In no time the closest people to dad and his business associates gather around me, wishing me happy birthday, telling me how pretty I look and how I have grown up and blah fucking blah.
โGod, she looks so pretty. Viraaj, you need to get her married to my son. What a fine pair theyโll make.โ An aunty, probably dadโs associateโs wife, comments with dreamy eyes. Trust me, if eyes could get things done, Iโd most probably be transferred to a wedding mandap with her son.
As much as I wanna scream at her that her son is a pig and my standards are not underground, I keep my mouth shut and smile at her.
โHappy birthday, beta. You look stunning.โ Someone else compliments me and it goes on and on.
The only thing that comes out of my mouth every now and then is a small โThank Youโ and some fake smiles, chuckles and everything in between.
My eyes reflexively move to the man standing behind everyone, staring at me as if I am his new favourite subject to study. He doesnโt do anything more than standing at some distance with his hands in the pockets of his pants and eyes on me, taking in every inch of me.
So, I decide to do the same. I look at him, try to read his face for any thoughts which might be swirling in his head, but I get nothing. His beautiful brown orbs look so welcoming that itโs actually scary, because I donโt feel that towards any strangers. His straight nose, beautiful lips.
How good will it feel to suck on them, or have them on my-
What the fuck!
I shake my head and tear my face away from him almost instantly. Whatโs wrong with me? What am I even thinking? I need to get those thoughts out of my head.
As if developing a brain of their own, my eyes steal another glance at him and I am not kidding when I feel something tingling inside me the moment I spot the sinister smirk on his face.
No no no.
He didnโt.
Right?
He canโt know what I was thinking, right?
โRi, did you meet Veer?โ Dad says and I look at the guy who is still smirking at me, though itโs barely visible, but itโs still there. There is something in his eyes which I cannot put a finger at.
Not that I care.
Yet, the look does something to me.
Veer makes his way through the crowd and stops right in front of me, keeping little to no distance between us. Itโs the amount where one canโt suspect anything but you know itโs in your inner circle. And that makes me nervous.
โVeer, meet Rysa. Rysa, meet Veer.โ Dad has this proud smile on his face as he introduces us.
Veer forwards his hand in my direction, โhello, baby sister. Happy birthday to you.โ I hesitate for a moment before forwarding my own hand to shake his. โThank you,โ I somehow mumble.
Why am I acting like this all of a sudden? Something is seriously wrong with me.
โOkay, letโs cut the cake now. You can get to know each other later.โ Thatโs my mom. She is my all time saviour. Love you, mom.
Everyone gathers around as two people bring a four tier chocolate cake with vanilla icing and some white iced lilies on the sides. Itโs pretty if you ask me. Looks all white and vanilla from the outside but when you cut it, the dark chocolate meets you.
I pick up the knife as they settle the cake in front of me when suddenly I feel a presence right beside myself and turn abruptly. Veer stands casually, staring at me in admiration and something else, looking ever so calm while his mere presence brings every cell of my body on fire.
โWhat are you doing here?โ I ask him, making sure to keep my voice as low as I can so no one hears me. โWhat? Iโm just standing. Got a problem with that?โ He takes a moment before something changes in his eyes, โor are you feeling nervous, princess?โ
โIโm not nervous. Stop making things up.โ
โThe way your body is shaking, I fear it exposes your lie.โ
โI am not nervous. Itโs just cold around here.โ
Yeah, thatโs the excuse I came up with. Can you fucking imagine? My sense of humour and comebacks are degrading in his presence. He needs to be out of here.
โCome on, baby, letโs cut the cake. Youโll have all the time in the world to chat with your brother.โ Dad pipes in and I turn towards him almost immediately.
I donโt want to chat with this stupid asshole any longer. This is already torture for me. Ignoring his existence- atleast, I try my best- I blow the candles and make a wish.
โGod, save me from all the fuck ups I am gonna do this year.โ
Thatโs all I wish for before cutting the cake. Everyone claps and sings โhappy birthdayโ for me as I cut a piece and turn towards my mother. I feed her the cake and she gives me a bite too. I repeat the same with dad and he also feeds a little bit of the cake to me before taking some on his finger and rubbing it on my nose.
He is such a kid.
I scowl at him and feign anger to which he sheepishly smiles, bringing a smile on my own lips. โAm I not getting anything?โ Veer chimes in, his voice making me turn in his direction.
Not wanting to create a scene, I cut a slice of the cake and forward my hand to his mouth. He grabs a hold of my wrist, goosebumps spreading all over my skin from his touch, and stares directly in my eyes before opening his mouth to eat the cake. He purposely brings his tongue out and licks my fingers clean, all while keeping eye contact.
โHappy birthday, baby sister.โ