Question Mark
Things would have been different if this burden weren’t a burden. I still question myself about it. But before I could find an answer to everything, there comes a pause-a pause brought by an amazing human being, I’d say.
“Please don’t overthink, Mingming. You’re in great trouble right now. So is he,” said my best friend, Ayano Yamada.
Best friend? Nope. I’d call him my older brother because he treats me like his sister. As a lonely child with parents who had no time to spend with their own daughter, I lived with my grandmother for three years before she passed away. My parents were busy with their lives in Los Angeles. My dad actually likes to spend time with me, but my mom’s arrogance and selfishness forced him to move out with her. I had plans, though. I lived with my best friend Ayano after my grandmother’s death. His dad was also there.
“Pants?”
“Check.”
“Tops?”
“Check.”
“Your medicines?”
“Mmhmm.”
“Mmhmm?” Ayano repeats. “What’s with the mmhmm?”
“Uh... don’t you think I’m capable of being myself without medicines?” I ask him.
“Being yourself, huh? In what sense do you mean by ‘being yourself’? Is it the Dracula you, the traumatized you, or Tanaka Mingming? I mean, you need to take your medicines, Tanaka Mingming,” he replies.
“Yeah, you talk a little too much about this. I’ll take them,” I say. Obviously, I’m lying to him about that.
“I think everything on the list is present,” he said. I nodded. I sighed and looked at him.“What is it, Ming? You look a bit sad.”
“You could’ve joined me. You got accepted and you said you had friends there. Then why are you backing out?” I pouted.
“I’m sorry, Mingming. I’m not mentally prepared for it.”
It was almost my time to go inside the airport.“Mingming, it’s time. Have a great journey, okay?” He left me with a hug.
I was pretty anxious about going alone. Ayano is gone, I think. It’s around 7:45 pm, so there are only 15 minutes left. Sitting in the departure lounge, with the news playing and kids wandering around, my attention was on the news channel.
“Japan’s wealthiest entertainment agency, Deep Sea Labels, recently announced the debut of their new girl group, Luminos, set to shine on July 8th. But the waters aren’t calm. The fans of Minnix—a once-celebrated soloist under the same label—have stirred a storm. Three years of silence from her, and not a single musical update. Frustrated and suspicious, fans have started demanding answers from none other than CEO Kuroji Hanzaki.”
I rolled my eyes. Yeah, you better tell them how you shattered her life and walked away clean.
“We now have Mr. Kuroji Hanzaki, CEO of Deep Sea Labels, live on air. Sir, would you care to comment on Minnix’s current status?” the reporter asks.
And just like that, he appeared. Calm, calculated, and cold enough to give me goosebumps.
“It’s disheartening to see Minnix’s fans grow impatient. I completely understand their concerns. Unfortunately, Minnix is currently taking a break to focus on her studies. I regret not announcing it formally. She’ll return to the spotlight very soon.”
Oh, absolutely. She’ll return all right—right after climbing out of the pit you threw her into.
Liar.
Monster.
And bitch, you better run.
Oh, wait. Where are my manners?
Hi. I’m Tanaka Mingming, 21, currently not in prison for murder, which is honestly impressive. I live with my best friend Ayano Yamada and his sweet, overly calm father—whom I call Mr. Yamada, because manners still matter even when your life’s in shambles.
And Minnix?
Please—that used to be me.
Now? I’m not so sure.
One thing’s certain though…
I didn’t disappear.
I paused.
And guess what happens after a pause?
Play.
I got inside and sat down. It’s been a long time since I was on a plane. It’s peaceful somehow. This is a one-hour flight. The plane has Wi-Fi, and I thought of using this opportunity to explore Sakura University.
“Oh, Sakura University, huh?” the person next to me spoke up.
I looked at him and nodded.“Me too,” he replied.“O-Oh,” I replied awkwardly.
“Aren’t you from Naha?” he asked.
“Y-Yeah. Bet you’re also from there,” I chuckled.
“H-How did you know?” he asked.
“Because why would you assume that I was from Naha? That means you’re also from Naha,” I smiled at him.
“What major are you?” he asked.
“I’m a music student.”
“I’m a physics student. Second year, actually.”
“Oh, that’s great. What’s your name?” I asked.
“I’m Aoi Kimura. What’s your name?” he asked me.
“I’m Mingming Tanaka,” I replied.
“That name sounds really cute. Like you,” he giggled.“Eh?” I raised a brow.
“I’m not lying, you are cute.”
I chuckled. “I appreciate your compliment, Aoi.”
Honestly, this is not as creepy as I expected. Time passed, and I got into the cab I had booked and made my way to the dormitory area of Sakura University. It doesn’t look like a dormitory, though. It’s just a place filled with houses meant for students or other residents affiliated with the university.
They assigned me a place to stay. Each house accommodates up to six people, and this was the last available spot in the area. Currently, I don’t have any housemates, but the warden mentioned there’s a high chance that at least one person will join me soon.
After settling everything in my new place, I decided to go to bed early. The room was quiet and the bed was surprisingly comfortable, helping to ease my initial anxiety.
The next morning, I woke up refreshed and had a quick breakfast in the common kitchen.
I made my way to University, excited and nervous about the first day. I was actually late and entered the hallway. The pin-drop silence scared me a lot. Having zero clue which building my class was in, I was stopped by someone. It was a young professor.
“Excuse me, kid. Do you have any reason for being late?” he asked.
“This is actually my first day,” I responded.
“First day or last day, we don’t care. You’ll have punishment for this.” I bowed to him and sneaked a peek at his ID card. Mr. Fukashi, Incharge of English subject.
He went inside the staff room with a bundle of papers. A moment later, he came back out and handed me a stack. “Take this to Miss Akemi’s room. It’s in Building 3, on the third floor.”
“Hey, you gotta be kidding me. Building 3!? It takes a mile to walk from here to there,” I responded, showing hesitation.
“See, Miss Tanaka Mingming, this is not a mile or something. You’re just lazy to walk. The building is next to this one, and it’s actually connected. So stop complaining and go submit the papers. Also, that’s your class. You’ll have to go there no matter what.
I sighed, resigned to my fate, and started walking towards Building 3.
“This is unfair. I don’t even go to the gym,” I muttered, my legs aching. “Fuck, I can’t even see where I’m heading.” I realized I was going to go blind trying to find my way back to the classroom among the seven buildings with thisthick bundle of papers, which was even thicker than my ex’s dad.
I walked towards the elevator but soon discovered it was only for disabled individuals. “Well, I guess it’s the stairs for me,” I muttered.
I started descending the stairs carefully, but suddenly, I felt a strong impact from behind and tumbled down, sending the papers flying.
“Ow!” I exclaimed as someone crashed into me, sending papers flying everywhere. We both fell hard to the ground, tangled in a mess of documents.
I looked straight at the person who crashed into me. “WHY CAN’T YOU USE THE FUCKING ELEVATOR IF YOU’RE BLIND?” I shouted in frustration. Wait..
“Aoi?”
“Mingming?”
He stared at me for a moment, then slowly approached me, gripping my wrist tightly. He quickly led me to a nearby wardrobe and closed the door, isolating us from the commotion.
As we stood there, I let out a sigh. “You have to help me with the papers, Kimura Aoi. What really happened?”
“Actually, I was walking on the sidewalk while the seniors were playing football. Somebody kicked the ball, and it hit me. They told me to pass the ball, so I tried to pass it back, but unexpectedly, the ball hit an iron nail, and... ” he paused.
“Okay, that pause explains the rest of your story pretty well. But why did you take me with you?” I asked curiously.
“You can tell them where I am if they ask you,” he replied.
“I wouldn’t say a word. What are they gonna do, bully me?” I scoffed. “Yeah,” he said. “Oh, then that’s a biggie. Let’s check if there’s anyone,” I asked. He nodded.
After that, Aoi helped me get the papers and guided me to my class.“Here are the papers you need,” Aoi said, handing them to me.“Thanks, Aoi,” I replied, feeling a bit nervous.he guided me into my classroom together, Aoi left, and the homeroom teacher approached us.“Good morning,” the teacher said, taking the papers from me. “Please introduce yourself to the class.“I took a deep breath and faced my new classmates. “Hi, everyone. My name is Tanaka Mingming. It’s nice to meet you all.”
“Great, Mingming you can sit in the very last row.” Teacher said and I walked towards the last row.
“You lied about packing your medicines, Ming Dynasty.”
“Ayano Yamada?”
“Oh, hey, Mingming,” he greeted.
“Oh, hey, Mingming,” chimed in a man sitting beside him.
“H-hi,” I responded with a smile.
I took a seat beside Ayano. “Miss Tanaka, Mingming,” Ayano addressed me, catching my attention.
“You thought you had escaped the medications? From me?”
“Well, I don’t need to think about escaping; I have already escaped the medications. Why would I need to escape from you? If anything, you should be the one trying to evade me,” I chuckled.
“What medications are you referring to, Mingming?” the guy next to Ayano inquired.
I couldn’t believe he was asking me that. How should I respond? Certainly, I couldn’t divulge my mental health struggles... This was becoming quite overwhelming internally.
“Constipation...” Ayano replied.
Wait, what? I glanced at him in disbelief. “He asked about my medications, not yours. I have anemia and take iron tablets,” I giggled.
Ayano’s perspective:
“By the way, you haven’t met him, right? This is Ren, my friend,” I introduced my friend to her.
“Nice to meet you, Mingming. I’m Yokoyama Ren,” he said, waving at Mingming. He then leaned towards my ear and whispered, “Dude, your best friend is hot.” He giggled. I glared at him.
“Yeah, she is,” I replied.
“So, is that your way of saying I can take her?” he smirked. I scoffed at him.
“Dude, I know her taste in people so I’m not sure about it and watch your words Ren. ” I said.
“Jealous? Haha, you better be,” Ren replied.
I burst into laughter. “You talk like she’s your sweetheart.”
“What is all this commotion about?” Mingming interrupted the argument.
“Ayano likes you, Mingming,” Ren laughed.
“Not surprised,” said Mingming.
I smacked Ren’s head. “You joker!”
“Ow! What? I was being honest,” Ren said, rubbing his head.
“Us in a relationship is weird, but what’s weirder is when you guys date; you’re no match for each other,” I said.
“I mean, that’s true. But I know who she’ll be a match for,” Ren said, smirking.
“You better not say it’s Takahashi Jun,” I said.
“He’s the one.”
“By the way, I didn’t see him today. Where’s Jun?” I asked.
“He’s upstairs helping the teacher,” Ren said.
A few minutes later,
I called out to Mingming, looking forward to introducing her to my friends. They were all really nice, and I hoped they would get along well with Mingming.
“So, these are your friends. Am I right?” Mingming asked me.
“Yes, they are,” I replied with a smile.
“Hey, Mingming. I’m Hiroshi, the leader, not really one, I’m just the brilliant one here.” Hiroshi introduced himself.
“Are you really that brilliant?” Mingming asked.
“Nope, he decided that. And there’s no such thing as a leader. He thinks he’s Kim Namjoon,” said the guy next to Hiroshi. Hiroshi giggled.
“And you must be?” She looks at him.
“I’m Aiko, the eldest,” Aiko said.
“I’m Eisuke and I am the one in charge of FM radio in this uni” Eisuke said.
Mingming smiles at him and nodding.
“I’m Gota, your new friend,” Gota said cheerfully.
“Babe,I’m Ren. We’ve already met,” Ren grinned.
“I’m Ju-Babe?!” Jun looked at Ren as if he saw Jesus eating a vegan chicken popcorn.
“Y-Yeah. Right, babe?” Ren looked at Mingming and winked.
“Who are you trying to bring back, Ren? Is your ex here?” Mingming asked, laughing.
“Yokoyama Ren needs to stop acting pervy,” Hiroshi said.
“You’re single enough to not know the difference between flirting and being a pervert, and you need to stop pretending to be Kim Namjoon,” Ren retorted.
“Are you single, Ren?” Mingming asked.
“No, I have a girlfriend,” he replied.
“Let me guess... Is she your girlfriend?” Mingming pointed out a girl a little far away from them, glaring at her.
Ren turned around to look.
“Holy crap-” Ren had a mini heart attack.
“You’re dead, Ren,” Gota exclaimed.
Ren stood up and ran away.
“Hey,” Jun called out. Mingming looked at him.
“I’m Jun,” he said awkwardly.
“Nice to meet you, Jun,” she said, smiling.
Ren came back.
“You look really pretty, Jun,” said Mingming.
He looked at her and paused.
“Is that a compliment?” Ren raised his brow.
“Yes, it is. Thank you, Mingming,” Jun winked.
“Such a girly man,” said Ren, rolling his eyes.
“Jealous? Haha, as you should be,” Jun said.
“It seems like you are very much satisfied with your half- Yakuza, half-femboy look, Ren,” Eisuke remarked.
“Don’t bring that up, FM transmitter,” Ren said.
---
Mingming’s perspective:
Ayano’s friends are actually nice. I never thought he’d have this many friends.
We had our lunch, and after that, I made my way to the washroom, only to get blocked by a girl. Girls. One of the girls dragged me into a bathroom.
“Tanaka Mingming,” said the girl who had pulled me closer.
“W-what?” I replied in confusion.
“I thought we could meet. In fact, I meant very deeply,” she said.
“Okay?”
“Okay? Is that how you respond after sitting and flirting with the love of my life?!” she exploded.
“Uh, I’m sorry. If it’s Yokoyama Ren, he’s the one who started it, and I don’t even have any par-”
“Yokoyama Ren?” she asked, confused.
“Yeah?” I replied.
“Now who the heck is that?”
“It’s not Ren?”
“No.”
“Takahashi Jun?”
“Nah, not that ladylike wannabe Minnix fanboy.”
He likes Minnix? No way.
“Then?”
“It’s the one who looks like a baddie. He was beside you, smiling at you and introducing other guys,” she said, rolling her eyes.
“Ayano?”
“Yes.”
“Uh, why?”
“We have something in common in our names.”
“And what’s your name?”
“Aya Suzuki.”
“Dear Suzuki Samurai, would you tell me why you even address him as the love of your life just because you have the same three letters in your names?” I looked at her in disbelief.
“You’re just jealous,” she scoffed.
“Of what? Honey, I’m 21, not 10.” I laughed. She scoffed again.
“You think that’s funny? You’re his best friend, so you can trick other girls into not liking him,” she said as she pulled my tie in anger.
“Do you know what’s more funny?” I slowly moved her and pinned her against the wall. I moved closer to her face, my arm around her waist. She tried to push me away.
“Mingming, let go of me,” her hands tried to push me.
I held both her hands in mine and pinned them over her head and smirked.
I leaned my lips to her ear. “It’s actually funny seeing you panic when I do this to you,” I whispered. I looked at her. She started blushing and bit her lower lip.
“Anyway, I gotta go. I’ll let him know about you.” I let go of her and walked out of the bathroom, seeing her minions glaring at me. “She’s got some questioning to do with herself. She’ll be okay.” I winked at them and walked away.
I walked out of the washroom and made my way to the ethnomusicology class.
“Mingming!” I heard a call from behind. I turned around. “Jun?” He approached me.
“Hey, Mingming, where are you heading?” he asked.
“I’m on my way to the next class.”
“Ethnomusicology?”
I nodded. “Well, the teacher can’t hold classes today,” he replied.
“Why?” I pouted.
“I don’t know, but he’s called me in. Maybe you’d like to join me?”
“Sure,” I smiled.
We walked for three blocks, which actually frustrated me, but Jun seemed to know every place here. Maybe it’s because he’s been here longer, but he’s also a first-year student like me. Sounds like I need to improve my skills.
To avoid boredom, we started chatting.
“Jun?” I called.
“Hm?”
“How did you guys meet Ayano? I know he has friends, but I never knew where he made so many.” I chuckled.
“Do you know about the eSports event in Osaka three years ago?” he asked.
“Of course I do.”
“We were one team. Were you there?”
“Nope. I had other plans, like preparing for my exams.”
“So you were a nerd back then?” he teased.
“Technically, yes. I was forced to be the perfect child, only to compete with a boy my mom admired.” I rolled my eyes.
“And why?” he asked.
“I don’t know. Maybe because he’s the most perfect student my mom has ever seen. He didn’t seem like he wanted to be competitive either, but he was.” I replied.
“Wasian moms are super weird. They’re obsessed with studies and straight A’s,” Jun said. “Then there’s my mom, who is completely opposite. She never forces me into anything. She’s calm,” he added.
I looked at him. “That’s pretty cool. I wish my mom had the same mindset as yours.”
“I miss her so much, to be frank.”
“It’s okay jun, there’ll be vacation.”
“No Mingming, it’s impossible.”
“Why? Where is she now?”
“Oh....She’s dead.”
“What!?” I looked at him, shocked. “You’re so calm and cool about it. What the hell, Jun,” I said, flabbergasted.
He laughed. “I know, but it’s been a long time. I was 6 years old back then.”
“What do you miss about her, Jun?”
“Her food. Especially spicy karaage.”
“Oh... I can actually cook. Maybe I can make it for you if you want,” I said, smiling awkwardly.
“Then we’ll cook together,” he said, smiling.
“Yes, someday,” I said, looking at him.
“Mingming.”
“Hm?” I looked at him.
“We’re in the ethnomusicology room,” he said.
“Okay, what are we going to do here?”
“I don’t know. He just called me to come here.”
We opened the door. There he was, fixing a part of a 58-year-old koto. He noticed us.
“Oh, Takahashi Jun!” His voice... I know that voice very well. He got up and walked toward us, staring at me.
“You must be Mingming.” I stood there, nodding and bowing.
“Teacher, your voice seems very familiar,” I told him.
“Oh, you do?” he asked.
“Maybe because I used to work in the dubbing field, especially for animes,” he added.
“Oh... but still, it’s not from the movies you have dubbed. Let’s not dwell on it. What is the reason for today’s cancellation?”
“I had my mother hospitalized, so I was there for half the day. After that, I lost my mood to teach,” he replied.
“Mingming, he’s actually a good teacher, and you don’t even have to feel burdened to treat him like a friend,” Jun told me.
The teacher took my hand and shook it.
“It’s really good to see you here, Mingming. I’m Masaru Hayashi from the Department of Ethnomusicology. Welcome to Sakura University.”
I really hope I’ll be in good hands
