Chapter 1
So…
This is the end.
It ended just like this… why?
Where did everything go wrong?
We were happy.
At least, I thought we were.
Then how did everything change so suddenly?
Is it my fault that all this happened?
If it is…
then what did he do to deserve this?
Why did he leave me?
…all alone.
Why did he have to die?
Why not me… but him?
Why…?
Why did I do that?
I was just angry.
Not at him.
I was angry at myself.
And still…
I hurt him.
I pushed him away.
I told him to leave me alone.
I still remember it so clearly.
The way he looked at me.
Like he wanted to say something…
but he didn’t.
And I didn’t stop him.
I didn’t call him back.
I didn’t even try.
I just stood there…
and let him walk away.
I thought he would come back.
He always did.
No matter how much we fought,
he would come back with that stupid smile…
like nothing ever happened.
That was just who he was.
Kai.
Always laughing.
Always joking.
Always making everything feel lighter.
And me…
I was just the opposite.
Quiet.
Confused.
Always overthinking everything.
But somehow…
he stayed.
He stayed with me.
And I got used to that.
I got used to him.
So when I told him—
“Just leave me alone.”
I didn’t think…
he actually would.
I didn’t know…
that this time,
he would leave me alone forever.
…
I never got the chance to tell him.
Never got the chance to say what I really felt.
All those times…
when I wanted to say it…
I stayed silent.
I was scared.
Scared that things would change.
Scared that I would lose him.
But in the end…
I lost him anyway.
Without even trying.
Without even telling him.
That I…
I loved him.
More than myself.
More than anything.
I loved him so much…
and he never even knew.
…
“You were the loudest part of my life…
and I was just the silence you never noticed.”
…
Kai…
If you can hear me…
I’m sorry.
I didn’t mean it.
I didn’t mean goodbye.
…
Please come back, Kai…
Please.
I’m begging you…
Just come back.
You promised me…
You said you would never leave me alone.
And you never break your promises, right?
So why this time…?
Why did you break it?
Please, Kai…
Please…
I can’t do this without you.
Everything feels so empty.
It’s too quiet without you.
I hate this silence.
I hate it so much.
…
Please come back.
Even if it’s just for a moment…
Even if it’s just to see you one last time.
I won’t fight with you again.
I won’t push you away.
I won’t tell you to leave.
I promise.
Just…
please come back to me.
…
Kai…
please…
…
I beg you!!
