The twin I couldn't be

The hospital lights flickered on and off as thunder rattled heavily against the ceiling. Arene, my twin sister, lay in bed, fast asleep. She looked so peaceful…..even though it wouldn’t last much longer. I never thought that girl who once played barbies with me or stole mom’s makeup would become so frail and weak. Her eyes had grown tired lines yet she forced a smile, her memory was slipping, little by little—but she fought to hold on and my trips to see her grew more because I knew…I wouldn’t be able to let go….

The nurse gently placed a hand on my shoulder, “Maybe you should let her rest for now ... .It's getting late and your parents must be worried about you.”

I stood, but my feet weren’t ready to move.

The nurse sighed, “Don’t worry. I’ll make sure to take good care of her.”

She led me out into the hallway before disappearing into another room.

I kept walking toward the exit–until a loud metallic sound rang out from somewhere nearby.

Curiosity had gotten the better of me and so I slowed. I shouldn't have stopped. But I did.

I glanced through the half open door.

A boy my age sat on the bed, aggressively strumming a guitar.

“Is he even allowed to do that in here?” I whispered under my breath and he stopped mid-way.

He turned to me annoyed but his face quickly lit up as his eyes swept over my face.

I took a closer look at him. His dark hair covered his almond eyes slightly, his clothes were a bit worn out and he seemed tired ….though his bright smile begged to differ.

He had a smug smile, "Continue."

I raised an eyebrow, “Continue what?”

He leaned against the wall, “You can continue to admire me. Isn’t that what you were doing just now?”

What the actual…..

Nope. Absolutely not. I felt bad for interrupting him but now I’m seriously weirded out. I don’t even know him but I do know that he’s way too full of himself.

“What you need is your brain checked. Too much ego is unhealthy.” I turned to leave but he pulled my wrist.

I backed away, “What are you doing?” He just stared at me dumbfounded.

Before he could continue a nurse appeared guiding him back to his room.

I shook my head and left towards the exit.

I got home later that night to find my mom glued to her laptop, exhausted from another zoom class. Being a college professor meant her schedule was packed all week……and even on weekends.

I quietly shut the door behind me as I stepped inside.

Mom sighed in relief, “Do you have any idea how worried I was?”

“I’m going to my room. I’m tired and it’s late.” I slipped past her–

“How long are you going to go on like this? I know it’s hard ... .It's hard for me too, Ari.” Her breath shook, “But life has to go on. Your sister hasn't even said goodbye yet and you’re already hiding yourself away. I’m worried about what will happen when she does.”

My throat burned and my eyes began to water, “Sleep early mom.”

I ran to my room before the tears could fall.