What is your opinion?
The beginning of a fantasy epic?
"The story was very interesting from beginning to end. I loved the idea of all the different races and of the adventures that happened in the tavern. I wasn't sure if this was meant to stand alone or if it was just the beginning of a longer story. If it is the beginning, I would suggest that you do some foreshadowing for what is going to happen next. Other than that, I really liked it. Good luck in the contest!"
A nice little exposition
"This reminds me of The Yellow Flag, a bar from the Anime "Black Lagoon" that gets destroyed in just about every episode it's in. This was a fun look into Talbata's life and the mishaps/fortuitous circumstances that surround it. Sometimes it's nice to step away from the grand adventurers and heroes and look at the simple folk they pass. Well done. You made me want to be a customer there. If you wanted, this could be continued into a larger story, or just left the way it is. I'm tempted to say you should describe the bar itself a little more, but that would probably just add unnecessary length to it the story and drag it down."
Just Lovely
"Wonderful! I adored the concept that so much adventure could take place in a single tavern, making the title very poignant. There were a few minor spelling errors, but the story was a very smooth read and your style excellent."
A bit rough around the edges - kinda like Talbata's Tavern
"I enjoy a good "you do not have to look far to find all kinds of adventure". Your story has excellent potential but falls down a bit in places. I did not get a good picture in my mind of the tavern or of Talbata herself.at the opening of the story. The description of the "adventures" is good but a bit repetitive. It also felt like it did not really close off well. You just kinda stopped describing things. The second sentence "Talbata, the middle ..." would, I think, read better as "Talbata, a middle ....". The third sentence beginning "When she moved ..." is long and not easily followed by the reader. I think it should be broken up into smaller, bite sized pieces. Your opening sentence and paragraph need to catch and keep the reader. Flaws are especially noticeable. Your grammar is OK, but does need work in places. Hope this helps. I would love to read your next tavern tale. David"
