afterlife

Sarah’s feet hit the wooden grey flooring as she is trying to come to the thought falling on to the bed and pulling the covers over my heard. And ignoring the world as all she wants to do is sleep all day, staring into space wanting to curl up in a ball but she feels she needs to talk to somebody to think clearly to make some big decisions.

She shakes the feeling of going back to sleep she has already phoned in sick to work so that is taken care of shakes off the tiredness heads to the bathroom when she comes out, she is ready to get dressed and face the cold and chill. Puts on a big hoody and joggers

She puts the earphones in the iPhone ignore all notifications the display on the phone screen she starts walking the long and bendy road to see my mum or a long overdue chat.

As she walking along she looks at the scenery as she passes them and sees the hills in the distance and the Wallace monument in the middle of it all the beauty of it the only thing that only thing that ruins this walk is the traffic speeding past her.

She has walked further than she had thought when lost in thought she was nearly there she seen the big thinly gates closed which had a square white sign with words that say blare Logie cemetery am standing outside the gates she hesitated to go in as it was a dark day and she had never been in the cemetery on her own. as she takes the first couple of steps she thinking just pull your self together and get a grip nothing is going to happen to you your not alone but they are all dead!

she sees a light in the distance but not too far into the distance to know its in the graveyard with her she feels the Adeline and her legs to feel shakey she can’t move any further forward she turn round and runs out and slams the gates behind her. as the day is just getting on a bit she takes her phone out her pocket and looks through her contacts and looks down the names for her friend Julie to come and help her get in to the graveyard to check out what the bright light was as Julie likes to figure out thinks she’s my partner in crime some company woukdnt be the worse thing in the world she starts to think while the phone starts ringing .

Julie feels sick when she sees Sara name pop up on her phone she quickly think through her options of if she ignores it and then thinks of what actions will follow of this action then what will happen if she picks up the phone deep down she wants to hear Sara voice since she has been missing her even though she has been avoiding her since she won’t open up about what she is going through at the moment and Julie doesn’t like to be lied to even though Julie knows deep down its not Sara fault she just has to figure out the problem herself so she can talk about it even though it hurts Julie and Sara knows it. Se decided to just answer the phone to see what Sara is phoning her for as if she was in trouble, she would never forgive her self. When Julie answers the phone there Is a silence at first, he just hears heavy berthing and like someone is scared just says Sara name a few times before Sara speaks Julie sighs deeply as she is relived, she is fine. Julie asks what’s going on! And where is Sara says she as the graveyard visiting her mum as Sara just wanted to talk to her July is quiet on the phone as she can tell with Sara’s voice that she is upset and is just trying to be a great fiend and Sara tells her about the fear about going in to the graveyard on her own and goes on to tell her about the bright yellow light at the back of the graveyard and Julie bites her lips to stop a stiff laugh coming out or any silly comment coming out her mouth and she knows her self that she doesn’t think before she speaks. And doesn’t want Sara to get upset and go into the graveyard on her own since it is dark and asks one question would you like me to come and meet you?

Sara thinks about it and one hand wants to say yes to investigate the bright yellow light in case it’s like grave robbers but smirks that idea away from her head that is crazy she thought but a real possibility, and on the other hand won’t get to speak to her mom properly with Julie there then decided it doesn’t matter as if Julie isn’t here she won’t go to the graveyard at all.

Yes, Julie, I want you to come meets me so we can go into the graveyard together Julie says give me 10 minutes and I will get in the car and come meet me and end the call with seeing you in a bit.

I hear a bussing noise I jump thinking someone’s watching me then I quickly realise it my music coming from earphones I turn my tunes of my iPhone take the socket out of my phone and put my earphones in my pocket and then any noise I hear I will know isn’t coming from me so I won’t have a heart attack as I feel my hear is going to jump out my chest. I keep hearing the traffic pass the junction you would drive in the graveyard and hoping Julie won’t belong.

my heart is racing just as I see these bright headlight coming towards me after few seconds I realize its Julie under my breath I say thank fuck am not alone anymore. we go to walk in but are very aware we hear whispered voices we decide to start walking to that direction as we go closer to the voices we hear we realise that it seem it coming from behind us as there it is people behind us we jump out our skin but we can’t see anything even when we shine our torch in that general direction cause we are so scared I realize me and Julie are holding eacother hands which is funny but makes me feel safer even in the darkness. but no one is around at all we both look at each other in the darkness we both start running back towards the gates where it is safer all I feel is my heart pounding. we both go home and decided to come back first thing in the morning. when I am alone at my home i sit and think if Julie should come back with me sometimes i feel like when i am in someones company if I want any company I know deep down when I have these thought that I am not very well my mind is playing tricks on me making me isolate my self early stages of depression I have felt this way many times before you would think I would learn my lesson instead of letting it get out of hand.