Timing

She primped herself in the mirror. It was her routine. She spent two hours on getting her curls just right and her lipstick the perfect shade. She was absolutely giddy this morning. The loyal family maid of the house shook her head softly smiling at the girl.

“Oh hi, Tabitha! Did you hear he’s coming today?” She clasped the teddybear that was in her lap tightly, unable to hide her excitement. Tabitha remembered the girl’s first moments and how she so resembled her exuberant five year old self.

“Yes Deonisia, so you better get on with it and eat a proper breakfast.”

Deo nodded excitedly. Tabitha walked away.

Not wishing to be tardy, Deo arrived exactly ten minutes after Tabitha had asked her to prepare herself. “Smells amazing! Is that bacon you’re making? What’s the special occasion?”

Tabitha was about to answer just as Deo realized her words and quickly corrected herself, “Goodness me! Of course! He’s arriving today, it’s so important we are properly fed.”An unreadable emotion flickered for just a second in Deo’s eyes. She lingered for a beat, and dropped her peppy demeanor. “Hey Tabitha?”

“Yes my dear?”

“Thank you. I truly mean that. Thank you…for everything.” She smiled genuinely even though Tabitha could see the wistfulness in her eyes.

“Now I must be off! I mustn’t be late to see him.” Deo ran off skipping to the harbor and Tabitha knew to get on with her day. There were clothes to be washed and laundry to be folded. But Tabitha knew this day was special and she made sure to keep a close eye on Deo.

A friendly Mr. Dachau came to visit and Tabitha felt a familiar flutter in her heart. If she were ten years younger or if she were not a widow she might have entertained the idea of a romance with Mr. Dachau, but as it were now, she gave the last of her love to the girl she loved as her own. Even though she was no longer a girl at 20 years and both her parents had passed. Tabitha knew that life had been hard on Deo, so she remained faithfully serving her long after receiving the last of her coins.

The minutes turned to hours and before long, Tabitha realized that she had not even finished laundering the clothes. She was frustrated as they could grow mildew from the cold frosty night. But as she watched the last of the rays go down across the hill, anxiety quickly filled her and she went straight to the dock. She excused herself abruptly then started speed walking then running to Deo. She screamed in relief when she saw her.

There Deo was. Her chin resting on her knees. Looking beyond the shore for a figure that would never return. She mumbled a feeble, “He’s not coming back, is he?”

“Don’t give up hope little lady, a storm’s brewing. His ship probably just got held back and…”

“It’s been two years Tabitha. I don’t want to lie anymore. He’s not coming back is he?”

Tabitha looked into the eyes of the little girl she had loved since birth, whose eyes once held so much hope, welling up into a mist of tears until the spark in them were no longer visible. How could she tell this little girl who she would give the world for that the person she loved most wasn’t coming back.

“You just have to trust the Lord’s timing dear. He’ll come when he’s ready.”

Deo laughed and for a second Tabitha genuinely felt she was giving her some semblance of hope.

“I love you Tab. Thank you for everything you’ve given me.”

Even though she wore a big dress to hide it, Tabitha could tell it was getting harder and harder to get Deo to eat. She was so frail it was like she was a child again. She sat down beside her to watch the sun completely set over the horizon. Deo leaned her head on Tabitha’s shoulder until she slowly fell to sleep. Since she was so small, Tabitha could carry her home like when she was a child even though it put an ache in her bones.

“Good night sweet baby girl,” Tabitha whispered, kissing Deo’s head gently, still damp and chilly from the outdoors.

Two and a half years ago, Deonisia had turned 18. Her parents had decided it was a proper time for her to marry. They had her eye set on someone she was to meet in a café in town. But on her way she ran into a boy. At first she thought him quite impolite for running into her so brusquely but as they talked the morning quickly slipped into night time and she missed the meeting entirely. After that, their meetings became more deliberate, more frequent, and more the highlight of her trips. Even with Tabitha’s help in covering up for her ventures, it didn’t take too long for her parents to realize that she was not meeting her potential suitors and instead was meeting up with Tristan.

They forbade Deo to see him again. Angrily they got into a carriage to try to salvage the relationship with an overly generous suitor known for his volatile temper, but the roads were muddy and days later when they had not returned, travelers found their carriage overturned.

Deo ran to Tristan, hoping he would kiss away the tears. But he saw what had happened as an omen that any love between them was to be doomed. So, like her parents, he tried to slip away in the night. But Deo woke up at the last moment to the sound of rustling and candlelight.

Half asleep and eyes crusted from tears, she mumbled, “Where are you going?”

“Away,” he replied.

Feeling her heart breaking, she whispered barely audibly, “Are you coming back?”

“No,” he responded and left swiftly, in case her tears should change his mind.

Deo tried to run after him but it was dark and he was much faster. “Wait!” She yelled, “Please wait! I’ll do anything.”

But her screams were lost to the night.

When Tabitha found Deo the next morning with a whole other level of heartbreak in her eyes and never having seen the girl so broken before, she sensed something bad had happened. Deo was bedridden for a week from grief, and Tabitha couldn’t take it anymore. She would do anything to give Deo hope and to sooth some of her pain, so she said brightly, “He’s coming right?”

Deo responded gently with a smile, “Yes, he’s coming today.” Slowly, to Tabitha’s surprise, Deo got up and spent two hours making herself immaculate, ate breakfast, and told Tabitha she was going to the harbor to meet him, “I just have to trust the Lord’s timing. He’s coming now that he’s ready.”

It broke Tabitha’s heart to know she was feeding Deo lies, but she also knew the lies were the thin line keeping her little girl alive.

Two years later, they had maintained the same routine. And each day Deo seemed more chipper, more expectant, exuberant even, certain that their time had come.

Tabitha began her morning routine of making breakfast and then going upstairs to remind Deo to eat. She was expecting their usual banter but Deo was still lying in bed. It wasn’t a surprise though, because Deo usually did not stay up so late waiting by the dock. Tabitha wanted to let her sleep in but ran her fingers across Deo’s head to make sure she wasn’t running a fever or had gotten sick. It was unusually cold.

“Goodness me!” Tabitha exclaimed, “You poor creature! I must not have given you enough blankets! I’ll go make some tea and be right back to warm you right up! Your parents would never forgive me if I let you catch cold!”

It was a little white lie Tabitha always told, trying to paint Deo’s parents as loving and warm when all they had been to her were cold and distant, using Deo as a chess piece.

Tabitha made the tea and as soon as she heard the kettle whistling, she poured a steaming cup and ran back upstairs to Deo. To her surprise Deo had not woken up yet. “Darling, I want you to let you sleep but you are just a bit cold, and I don’t want to watch you catch sickness dear. Drink the tea and I’ll let you sleep in as long as you like.”

Deo did not immediately answer Tabitha. A cold chill went up her spine as if someone had just clutched her heart with hands of ice. “Deonisia, how’re you feeling?”

She prayed for her usual chipper greeting, “Oh hi, Tabitha!” But instead the silence made the air feel heavier.

Tabitha gently pulled Deo’s arm. It was ice cold. Tabitha began panicking. She dropped the tea and screamed, “No! No! No!” over and over again as she began gentle prodding and then shaking the girl. But her whole body was cold and had gone stiff sometime in the night. Tabitha fell to her knees sobbing. Just yesterday Deo was the happiest she had ever seen in two years.

She grabbed the town doctor who officially declared Deo deceased. At first she asked for an autopsy but then the doctor responded firmly. “I could do that. But with everything the poor girl has been through, should we not leave her with her dignity?”

Tabitha nodded solemnly. Her whole routine and her world suddenly broken.