Part 1
I Hate Them, I Hate Myself
I hate them for deceiving
But I hate myself for believing
I hate them for saying they loved me
But I hate myself for what I thought we could be
I hate them for breaking things
But I hate myself for the misery I bring
I hate them for hurting
But I hate myself for existing
I hate them for going
But I hate myself for not knowing.
I hate them for what they did, but we all know it’s me who blew it. I mean, we’re just fucking kids.
Baby Blue
Baby blue tear drops blur the world
Everything swirls
It’s like bleeding out
I don’t understand this pain
Is this all in vain
Don’t destroy me
Just leave it be
Pain
It’s like bleeding out
I want to shout
But it’s not a stab wound
It’s that I’ve been uncrowned
From my place on top of her world
Broken
Don’t break me
It’s already been done
“Put me back together” I plea
I’m done with this feeling, it’s just no fun
Silver and Gold
One girl was silver, the other gold
One girl loved me, the other no
You see, I like silver better than gold
Sorry
I don’t know why, but I am
It hits me all at once like breaking a dam
The water floods out with gushiness
Begging for your forgiveness
I’m sorry
I don’t know why
I just am
Band-Aid
Do I rip it straight off or peel it slow
Nobody knows
Does the blood underneath still flow
Nobody knows
Will I cry, scream, or just inhale and blow
Nobody knows
Is the fake protection really just your ammo
Nobody, but you, knows
Bubbles
Everyone has a bubble
Floating and carefree
Bouncing beside them daily
Reminding them of joy
Of love
Of family
Of friends
Of life
But my bubble is blackened and bruised
It drags behind me
Reminding me of misery
Of hate
Of enemies
Of strangers
Of death
I still remember when she broke it
It’s only gotten worse since
Hugs
Your hugs were so warm
Now your hands are so cold
Your voice was so sweet
Now silence is all that you speak
Your smile was contagious
Now mine is gone
Your love was so strong
Now all I see is your weak, broken body
Your hands were so soft
Now your skin is cracked and dry
You were perfect
Now you’re gone
Dead
Deceased
Perished
Lost
Fallen
Slain
I wish you had hugged me one last time
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