What is your opinion?
Great book
"It’s a beautiful story and I enjoyed reading it from the very beginning since magic has always fascinated me I really enjoyed your story. Hope you keep writing. "
Love the storyline can't wait to read more.
"Not sure who my favorite character to is yet, possibly the Princess. I love the way you capture her emotion and personality. Same with Annix it's a slightly different writing style for a different character, or at least it seems that way to me. Very well written, a few errors here and there but nothing that made it difficult to understand "
Amazing!
"I absolutely love how you introduce your characters! Your writing style is also very nice and makes me want to read more. It shows that you have amazing imagination and think things through, which is good! Your story is definitely one I’ll continue reading and I’m so excited for your update. I’d recommend making the prologue in the same style as you made all of the other introductions. A bit more action rather than talk, but that might just be my view. Also, I’m so curious about Annix and how he becomes part of them. Rei is obvious and so is Silver, but I’m curious about him. Glad you made it interesting. Otherwise I don’t see anything bad, so I’ll gladly give you full rating<3 "
Fun Fantasy
"The characters in this story have depth and their own very different personalities. They are their own person with complex pasts, but I can see unpredictability because each seeks something different from what they're used to. It will be interesting to see how past trauma and desire for change will play out in this story. especially with a major event going on in the kingdom. All those characteristics make a very promising and exciting plot."
A nice fantasy novel
"The Description is good and the plot is unique and I would suggest to make the chapter longer I finished reading the prologue and it is kinda short but since it is just an introduction a prologue it's okay.And the Writing Style is good it fits the story and plot it have. Some chapters are cut into two parts and long but who doesn't like long stories? "
An Intriguing Beginning To An Promising Book
"The plot I think was insanely unique, I love these kinds of stories and this one in particular had me falling in love with the plot and the characters. This had such an interesting take on Fantasy and had a slow peaceful pace on the chapters. The prologue drew me in instantly and made me feel as if I was in the story. There was so much detail and immersive words and things that were explained and happened that pulled me in. The character Princess Rosellia I really like and think she really loves her kingdom and the people who reside in it. I think she is fierce in her own way and she tries hard. As the book progresses you can really be transformed into the book as the writing gets better and better. This was an exceptional book. The Kingdom, the fantasy-like-ness of this book was astounding and this author thought about the plot, the characters and the setting of this story pretty thoroughly. I didn’t find any grammar errors or mistakes and loved the fresh telling of this particular story. I enjoyed it a lot. I love fantasy books and this did not fail. I can’t wait for the author to write more on this book!"
I’ll keep reading
"I like your cover a lot. I enjoyed the characters and the magic system. The crystals sounded interesting. A couple paragraphs switched from present tense to past tense. I’ll definitely keep reading."
Interesting!
"Starting with things that I liked about "The Spryte Chronicles": the four main characters are unique; they're from different social classes, each of them has an interesting back-story and a clear motive, and they have distinctive voices. Rosellia is interesting—a princess who wants to live at her own pace, has a good eye for people, and makes rash decisions. At some point, I thought she's demanding and nags a lot, but the combination of her positive and negative traits make her realistic and make her goal of rising to be a good princess challenging to her. Silver's back-story is so sad and unpredictable; I found myself surprised at each twist and turn it took. Can't wait to see Silver, Annix, and Reina by Rosie's side. I like how you don't neglect the minor characters in the story as well. The world building is good; rich people are manipulative and have access to magic, and poor people don't have such power. I like how the setting varies between classes. The plot and the events happening are bringing these four characters together. The pace is slow, but there are no plot holes. However, there are a few things that felt off to me: 1-The situation of Annix's family: at first, you introduced Annix in his home with his parents fighting, and you showed him doing chores, then later in the story you said that he slept on the street because his parents has no spare money. He needs money to sleep in his own house? He has no family name even though he has a father? I don't get if he's homeless or not, but people sleeping on the street don't have chickens. 2- You say that Silver notices the reaction of people watching him run down the street, but he is not fully aware. If he isn't aware, then he shouldn't notice people's reaction and just simply continue running. 3- Is Reina from the Jadeford or Kiarale family? Check Reina's chapter to know what I'm talking about. Regarding writing style: You tend to tell more than show. Info dumping about characters, narrating action details, and redundancy slows down the delivery. Pay attention to what you want the readers to know from each chapter. Superfluous description of settings and the points mentioned above divert the attention of readers from events. Using (was+ verb-ing) gives the story a passive voice. I noticed you use simple sentences that start with a subject a lot and that makes the reading robotic. Try to decrease the use of "I feel", and focus on body reactions to emotions instead. All this monologue with a little bit of dialogue is heavy. Dialogue helps engage the readers and you can reveal characters' interests and traits and stories through it. Overwriting is a tricky business, and I suggest you reword paragraphs. Of course it's up to you to take or leave my advice. There are a few grammar mistakes. Keep a consistent tense (you keep switching between past and present tense), and the dialogue needs formatting (https://self-publishingschool.com/how-to-write-dialogue/) Writing four POVs is a hard task, but you're pulling it off pretty well, and I like what happened so far. Looking forward to see what will happen next! Keep it up! :)"
A unique fantasy novel
"Let's start off with one of the book's biggest strengths thus far which is the characters and the world. The author does a great job of making the characters likable and their motivations realistic. The world is also very intriguing and unique and is primarily what kept me engaged. The pace is slow, but that's because this novel takes its time with all its characters and gives the world room to breath. Worldbuilding doesn't happen in the thick of battle but rather in the everyday life of our characters. The author avoids the problem with slow pace (becoming boring) by seeding in rich characterization and conflict that keeps the reader invested. Rosie is a great character and all her frustrations shine a light on how restrictive being in a royal family can be in this world. It's clear she wants the best for her people, but it seems she's chained by the soceital norms. One thing I would suggest is reworking the prologue slightly. The entire chapter is exposition and it reads a lot like a high school history textbook. Remember, you have an entire novel to space out this information. If you drop too much in the prologue, chances are the audience won't remember the details past the 4th chapter. If you intertwine the 'telling' with some 'showing' and give it to the readers in small bites, they're likely to remember all the details because they link it to a specific even you've shown. Of course this is only my opinion, and if you do have a purpose for the prologue being heavy in exposition, then feel free to keep it in. After all...You're the author, not me. Most of the grammar is correct and there weren't any blaring errors in your writing style. Maybe look over your sentence length in some portions of some chapters and try to vary it. But that's a nitpick so don't worry about it. Overall, this is a novel with a unique world and relatable main character that readers can get behind. Keep up the great work and all the best with writing! The reaper sends his regards."
Good start
"I like the story so far and the world that you're constructing. I would be mindful of the chapter length and also your verb tenses, as you tend to switch between past and present when moving between dialogue and narration."
Good Job
"It’s a good story overall but some chapters a longer than others. I recommend shorting the chapters a little and putting space between paragraphs. Other than that it was good. I laugh when you started comparing chickens to people."
Good work!
"The story is good and the writing style is also very attractive. I really liked how you presented your characters in the story. I would just like to suggest you to reduce the chapter length and word count and try to leave space between the paragraphs since it will be easy for the readers to read conveniently. All the best. Thanks for sharing :)"
