Breaking the Ice
You are going to die one day. Probably sooner than you want to. And there would be a billion things you would leave undone. With that out of the way, thank you for spending this very limited time of yours reading my sneering words of narcissism.
I spend most of my time thinking about the great things I am going to do in the future. I hardly do them but it feels nice to think about them. It gives me this miniaturised experience of how it would feel to actually do it. I have learnt how to trick my brain into believing stuff. It isn't even hard to do. All you have to do is talk. Talk to yourself for an extended amount of time and your brain feels obliged to answer back. That way you can have conversations with yourself. Like whether you should order in for lunch, whether you both agree that your colleague is exceptionally stupid, or what was your opinion on the new Batman movie.
Screw that though, I want to talk about my day. No specific reason. It is just that people usually talk about events in their journals. How they woke up super early in the morning with a three-inch smile and went about their day. The problem with me is that I don't wake up super early in the morning. I do have the smile though. It is fake. But nobody can really tell. And I wear it so often now that even I can't tell. See? I have indeed tricked my brain.
Sorry, I was beginning to talk about my day. I go along tangents very often. I feel itchy when I leave thoughts incomplete. Not again. Today. Let's talk about today. I woke up at 7 because my neighbour's dog apparently has influenza. Normal dogs bark. My neighbour's dog coughs. You can hear his phlegm dissolve into his saliva as he spits the concoction out. Sorry for that visual. But I suffer through it every day. I took a bath and all that stuff. I brushed my teeth and went to the dentist. I didn't mention I have braces, did I? Now, you know, I guess. I have had them for 2 years now. And I don't have the considerate invisible ones that you can remove while having meals. I have the cold metal ones that play an internal tug of war. They pull and tug and they keep doing it without breaks. Today, I went to the dentist. I have so much respect for his job. Soldiers get too much credit. And deservedly so. But they don't have to lean into a person's open jaw and tinker around without talking about the bad breath. They don't have to put their finger to keep their mouth open and let their pinkies get soaked in saliva. Ok, shit. What is it with saliva today...
Anyway, I came back and yeah. I remember watching some YouTube videos. Then, I decided to write this. So, my day mostly passed with me lying down on my couch and my eyes glaring at the screen. I think this is enough for the day. I just ran face-first into a sad thought. Those ones take more time to think through. And that wretched beast is spitting out phlegmatic coughs again.
