Chapter 1
I wake up in the morning and let out a painful growl. My heat is coming up... I can feel it... Damn...
After closing my eyes and taking a deep breath I get up and prepare for school. Once I’m dressed, I swallow my pills that suppress the heat and leave my room.
“!”
I let out a startled sound as I bump into someone and fall on the ground.
“Morning. Let me help you up.”
I see a hand infront of me and recognize that voice. My Alpha. He lets out a threatening growl as I don’t take his hand, making me tense up.
“Amara...”
His voice doesn’t let me refuse and I take it. He pulls me up and I nod polity at him, still not looking at him and hurry to the kitchen as I feel the heat burning stronger in my body.
As long as I stay away from him it’s gonna be fine today... it always is. And tomorrow is weekend. So today evening after dinner I will just lock myself up in my room, like I always do.
I know he hates such behaviour, especially from me but I don’t want to speak to anyone. Especially not him. Especially not now.
I can feel his stare on me during breakfast, angry that I treated him disrespectfully but focus my eyes on my plate while eating.
After I’m done, I get up from my seat in the corner of the room together with other pack members and wash my plate so I can hurry out of here.
On my way to school I listen to my music to calm myself while I walk through the woods. Usually people shift into their wolves to get through here but I’m refusing to acknowledge her. All this crap about bonds between you and your wolf, your pack, your mate... they’re all completely wrong...
No one would care more about someone else than themselves, if the time comes, no one... that’s what I was taught since childhood... you mustn’t trust anyone... once they themselves are in danger, they would betray you.
That’s not true... you know it...
My wolf speaks up through our mind link and I growl angrily.
Shut up. I didn’t allow you to talk to me.
She whimpers but goes quiet again. I hate having her with me. I hate that she can read my thoughts. I’m telling her since she first spoke up in my mind that I don’t want to have anything to do with her. It took her long to back away but there are still times now where she talks to me. Usually around my heat, when I have to use all my strength to fight against it and the blockade I keep up for the mind link is weakened.
While walking I feel a sharp pain in my stomach. Crap. Not...now... I fall to my knees, holding my stomach. This is not good... I’m almost on school grounds... I should have taken those damn pills yesterday already! Why is it so strong today?!
Heat builds up inside my body, making it feel like my insides are about to burn. My mind grows hazy and I can’t think straight... all I can think of are his teeth inside the skin of my neck... marking me... making me be his...
I shake my head, angry at myself and take deep breaths, trying to get control of my aching body again. Maybe I should just go back to the pack house... no... when my heat is this strong, I won’t be safe on the way back... I will be safer in school around the teachers...
You can’t fight against it forever. You are bond to him. It will just get worse and worse not being marked by him...
“Sh...shut up! I don’t need him! I don’t need you!! I don’t need anybody!!!”
I didn’t realize that I screamed that out loud until I sense people looking at me, including my Alpha and quickly bite my lip and look down.
“C’mon. Let me help you up. I’m gonna bring you to the nurse.”
My eyes widen at the husky, low voice and the scent of my Alpha next to me suddenly and all I can think of is begging him to take me.
Let mate claim you.
I growl loudly and grit my teeth, trying to keep control of my body. If I would not focus for one second, my wolf would gain control.
“Amara... Why are you doing this...? You’re torturing yourself and I can’t see you suffering like this... it kills me... please...”
I hear his voice and growl angrily again, his fingers touching my cheek.
“Shut up! Leave me alone! You don’t have the right to touch me!”
I slap his hand away and look him in the eye, pain shooting through them. I can feel my own eyes shifting colour to golden and growl again.
Don’t you fucking dare!
I scold my wolf in our mind and she flinches at my words. I get up and run to my class, feeling the stares of everyone, especially his on me while trying to breathe away the pain.
