Chapter 1
I killed the engine of my sports car in the parking lot of the shopping mall. The $230K metal beauty was about a month old and running as smoothly as a car that amount should. I could attest to its speed, it was the type you'd be happy to take for a drag race with a group of friends. Which clearly didn't apply to me since the number of people I'd call my friends couldn't be described as a group. However I wasn't complaining, I'd always known since I was a kid that a lot of friends meant a lot of drama and a lot of drama meant a lot of troubles and a lot of troubles meant a lot of uproar and that could easily escalate to worse things. So to avoid all those, just keep your circle small and tighter than a virgin. Everybody in my trade knew that and I wasn't an exception.
I wasn't one to follow every single rule though. If I was, I wouldn't be parked in front of the mall by myself. In fact, I wouldn't be there at all, my employees would handle it. Unlike others in my trade, I found pleasure in running errands and doing regular things. Window shopping, fast food drive throughs, train rides brought some bit of normalcy to my not-so-normal life.
A tired sigh escaped me as I walked inside the ever busy building. The stares- they never got old. Not to be narcissistic or anything, but I was very aware of my attractiveness. I attracted both genders every single time I came out and I did it without even changing my stoic disposition. If anything, they were entranced by my menacing frown and intimidating scowl. Add the fact that I was heavily inked and you got yourself a mass of ogling bystanders. Every fucking time. I wasn't antisocial though, quite the opposite actually. Selectively social, that was how I described myself. Once you broke past my cold walls, I was as playful as a jolly rabbit on a sunny afternoon after a carrot lunch.
My heart did a double take when a dirty blonde lady walked past me. That also never got old. Every single time I saw that hair color on a lady, she crossed my mind and as usual, my heart thumped painfully against my ribcage in disappointment, reminding me that I would have to just move on. It was the logical thing to do and I wasn't oblivious to it. That was why I moved halfway across the country, despite my hatred for environment change. Hell, I'd been living in the same damn house I was born in, up until the previous month. I decided I had had enough and bought a villa, a couple luxury cars and a plane ticket to another state across the country. To start a new chapter of life. To try new things. To forget her.
Yet here I was, thousands of miles away from home, squinting my eyes at every stranger who had the same hair color as hers did and hissing in frustration when I realized they weren't her. I didn't know if I was supposed to be disgusted at my stupidity or disturbed about my persistence, either ways I was fucked. Michele thought so too and was very vocal about his opinion when I told him I was moving, mainly because he didn't want to leave but luckily for me, he had no choice. My place was his place and he didn't have a say about that. For the first two weeks when we arrived, he made sure to remind me of what a dumbass I was for allowing her affect me that way.
"She's just a woman."
Those were his words but I didn't even bother to correct him. Nobody understood, even I couldn't understand it myself but unlike Michele and the rest, I'd long given up trying to contest it and I had just accepted the whole thing. Suzie was not just a woman, she was my woman. My heaven, earth and nine hells. The fire to my ice and water to my furnace. My vice, weakness, strength, guilty pleasure, happiness, aphrodisiac, passion. She was everything and the fact that I was still alive after she left remained an unsolved mystery.
What if she didn't leave?
I cursed my subconscious for trying to make my spirit soar, we both knew that was a horrendous lie. She wasn't kidnapped or anything, she wanted to disappear. To run away. To hide. From me. I didn't know how she did it but she was successful. Well, had been successful for the past 6 years. I didn't know pain till she waltzed out of my life, more like poofed out actually. Like I said, I didn't do well with change. Suzanne and my family house were perfect instances.
As though my face wasn't shielded enough, I still tugged down my baseball cap before entering into the grocery shop. A couple things caught my eyes and I stopped to glance at them for a few seconds before carrying on with my purchase. My housekeeper, Gracie, had given me a list of things to get and Lord help me if I missed one of those items. Gracie had been taking care of me since I was born so she was more of a grandmother figure than a housekeeper. She didn't mind the fact that I greased her bank account at the end of every month, she'd pull my ears if I botched an errand. My 68 year old housekeeper was probably the only person at the moment who had the audacity to keep me in check and I was oddly grateful to her for that.
At the food spices section, I looked at the memo written for me and back at the counter. Where the fuck was the paprika bottle? As my eyes glided across the thousands of condiments displayed, I caught sight of a staring lady a few steps away. Immediately our eyes clashed, she averted her gaze like a deer caught in headlights. As she should. However just as I continued my paprika search, she cleared her throat and there went my solitude.
"Hey, could you help me with that bottle up there?"
I looked at her with raised brows before turning to look at whatever she was pointing at. She clearly just didn't really need my help considering the fact that she was probably 5'10". All she needed to do was go on her tippy toes and voila, she'd have that jar of black substance in her hands. Despite the fact that I wasn't in the mood for any human contact, I still wordlessly gave her the thing she was pointing at. I was a loner, not an asshole.
"Oh, thank you very much. I don't know how I would have done that without you."
With stretched hands and on tiptoes, but whatever. I nodded silently and prayed that she'd just get the hint and go away.
"Thanks a lot again." So much for praying. "Uhmm, I didn't quite catch your name. The name's Suzanne."
My ears banged and my heart raced. She didn't look anything like my Suzanne but still. "W-what did you say your name is?"
"Susan. S-U-S-A-N. Susan." She chuckled shyly. "It's a pretty popular name."
With my poor luck, of course the fucking spelling wouldn't even be the same. Out of the billions of people roaming the earth, I was pretty sure that I was one of the few people the Heavens loved to play sick mind games on. The sarcastic sense of humor was probably fun, but I wasn't laughing about it. If I ever got the chance to spar with the celestial being in charge of my life, I'd curse that sadist for days unending.
"What's your name?" She persisted and I looked at the exit. Time to get the hell out of the place.
"I can't do this, I'm sorry."
Unlike the reaction I desired, she pressed on. "I just wanna get to know you. We can go for coffee or something in one of the shops in the mall. I know a nice one, I swear I won't waste your time. 30 minutes tops."
Oh fuck, I hated when my admirers started to hit on me or make passes at me. Clearly my encounter with Suzanne-with-the-wrong-spelling was headed that way and she was one of those persistent ones. "No, really I can't."
The fire in her eyes intensified and I knew I was doomed. She wouldn't take no for an answer. "Alright, 15 minutes. Just spare me 15 minutes."
"Leave. Me. The. Fuck. Alone." I gritted through clenched teeth and she flinched at my tone before tears gathered in her eyes. Nice. Just nice. I turned on my heels and sped walked out of that store. Thanks to Suzanne-with-the-wrong-spelling, I'd have to continue my paprika search in another shop. In the second store, I made sure to avoid aisles with anyone in them. My list was ticked from top to bottom after about 15 minutes and I was officially free to go home. However, I remembered Michele said he needed a filter for his cigarettes so I decided to get that for him too.
A whimper drew my eyes away from the counter and I did a swift head swipe. Next, my black sweatpants were tugged on and I moved my basket away to stare at a grey eyed boy with a wrapped lollipop in one of his hands. Did I mention that he was crying? Cos he was, puffy face, runny nose and everything. I glanced around for his mother, father or babysitter but it was just both of us in that lonely aisle. What the fuck was going on?
"Uhmmm, how are you little boy?" He was clearly not okay since he was bawling his eyes out but then, I didn't know what else to say to him.
"M-my-my mummy. I can't f-find her." He stuttered while crying profusely and I felt a pang of sympathy for the little boy. Losing your guardian at a public place would top the list of things a kid should be scared about. I dropped my almost full basket of groceries and crouched to talk to the frightened boy.
"Where did you lose your mummy?" I struggled to make my voice as soft as possible. I wasn't trying to heighten the anxiety of the already trembling child.
"I d-dont know." Letting out a sigh, I took the boy and walked round the store. After a fruitless journey, I concluded that he didn't lose his mom in that particular store. Which narrowed down the search to a hundred other stores in the mall. With that being said, the most suitable option would be to call the police but then, a man in my trade would never want to get involved with the police unless it was absolutely necessary. At that rate, we'd have to go to the communication centre of the mall so it could be announced over the speakers.
"Stop crying, little boy. We'll go to the control office and they'll get your mummy, alright?" He sniffed and nodded his little head. I gave my grocery basket one last glance before leaving with the kid. A couple workers in the mall explained the directions to the communication centre and I felt the boy tugging my hand anytime I had to stop to ask for clarifications. I took it that he wasn't comfortable with strangers. But then I was also a stranger to him so maybe he just wanted me to hurry the fuck up and get his mother for him.
The communication centre had a waiting room and a lady with a straight, black wig was seated at the table. That probably made her a receptionist. Her obnoxiously loud gum chewing was very un-receptionist of her though, more like a hooker type of thing but I wasn't one to judge work ethics.
"Hello! How can I be of help to you?" Her practiced speech was professional but her mannerisms though? She was looking at me like I was a box of piping hot pizza with melted cheese and a couple pineapple slices thrown on it. I was almost certain she'd let me fuck her in the quiet office if I did as much as offer a small smile. And that did not sit well with me one bit.
"Where can I meet the person who announces stuffs in the speakers?" She blinked once at my gruff tone and I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. Sadly for Ms. Loud-gum-chewing, I wasn't the type to make passes.
"Do you have a particular reason for wanting to meet the person who announces stuffs in the speakers?"
At that point, I had to roll the eyes. "Because I have stuffs that I want announced in the speakers?"
Her lips twitched at my sarcastic retort, then she pointed at the other door in the room. "In there. You'll meet the lady in there." I'd have thanked her but her initial eye-fucking dissuaded me, I wouldn't want her thinking I was interested.
"Hello." I said to the petite lady in the room that looked a little like a rec room in a radio house. "You're the one who announces stuffs in the speakers, right? I need you to announce something for me."
She eyed me with wariness and a hint of caution, which wasn't so surprising. I didn't look exactly like Father Christmas, didn't possess a welcoming air. People's first response to me was either to fuck or to flee. The superficial people wanted to jump my bones while the smart ones did the latter. "There's a process for that, sir. I can't just do it the way you want it."
My brows ticked in annoyance. "What's the damn process? I don't have all day."
She shrunk back a little and was probably already regretting her job. "W-what's the purpose of t-the announcement?"
"A missing kid."
I raised my hand that held the boy's and her eyes followed the movement. Her eyes snapped back to my face and then, the kid's again and back to mine again, until I was ready to growl in impatience. Whoever headed the HR department of Suncity Mall had to reconsider the hiring process, cos all they employed were sluts and sloths. After about 10 years, the petite lady decided she'd filled her eyes enough and God knew, I was thinking of snapping her neck.
"Is that the kid?" She pointed the boy holding my hand with a vice grip.
"Obviously."
Her face was filled with worry and incredulity as her eyes darted between I and the kid once again. What the fuck was wrong with the lady? "Isn't he your kid?"
That was it. The lady needed urgent medical attention. From a mental institution, to be precise. "If he was my kid, would I declare him a 'missing kid'? Please, do not be stupid and announce over the speakers immediately that a kid lost his mum in one of the stores."
"I think we should contact the police for this sort of thing."
I fixed her with the iciest look in my dictionary and watched with satisfaction as she physically withered under the heat of my gaze. "I'm going to say this one last time. Announce over the speakers that a missing kid is waiting for his mother in the communication centre. Right. Now."
Her body shuddered before her head bobbed slowly. "Alright. You can sit over there while I make the announcement."
Nodding in acceptance, I looked down at the little boy with a small smile. "They'll bring your mummy here any minute now." He gave me a bright grin that made my chest feel light. Well, that was new. I'd never felt anything like that before but then, I hadn't been really privileged to be around little kids. I ruffled his curly black hair and ushered him to the seat. "Let's wait here for her, stink." It was just one seat, so I placed the kid on my legs as we waited.
Attention! Attention!! Attention!!! A missing kid was found in one of the stores in the mall and is currently with us. If you're looking for your kid, please report to the communication centre for identification. I repeat, a missing kid was found in one of the stores in the mall and is currently with us. If you're looking for your kid, please report to the communication centre for identification. Thank you! To the rest of out shoppers, do enjoy your stay at the Suncity Mall.
The little kid tapped my hand and drew my attention from the blaring speakers. He gave me the wrapped lollipop and I raised my brows in question. Was he gifting it to me for trying to help him find his mother? I wouldn't have thought kids were that appreciative. "Why, thank you!"
I put it in my sweatpants pocket and widened my eyes when I saw his lips quiver. He didn't want me to have it? Appreciative, my foot. But what did he really want? I handed him back the lollipop but he shook his head. What now?
"Open for me."
Ohhhhhh, he wanted me to help open it. I chuckled at my initial failure at reading the situation and immediately tore the wrapper open. "Here you go, stink."
He gave me another chest-lightening grin before popping the cherry flavored candy in his mouth. "Thank you." Due to the new addition in his mouth, his words came out a little mangled and I'd be lying if I said it didn't sound adorable.
"What's your name?"
"Jake." I smiled at the name. It sounded like a name he should bear. Cute, just like him. My eyes sliced to the announcer lady and she quickly looked away, meaning she'd been keenly watching my interaction with Jake. I looked back at the kid on my legs and wondered why she'd thought he was mine.
"Probably the eyes." I muttered under my breath. He had grey eyes, just like me. But millions of people outside also had the same eye color, so it wasn't enough. "Hmmmm…" To be honest, he did look a little familiar. Like one of my cousin's kids or something.
There was a commotion in the adjoining room and the frantic female voice made me realize Jake's mother was finally here.
"Guess it's time, stink." I whispered to the boy on my legs. Funny how he was a crying wreck about an hour ago but at the moment, he was nonchalantly licking his lollipop. Kids were the weirdest lot, in the funniest way.
"He's 5. And about this height. Yeah, he's this tall-." I overheard some parts of the description from the other room. To be honest, I didn't really know how I felt about the woman who lost Jake. Mothers went through a lot of stress, true, but it wasn't enough reason to lose sight of such an adorable kid. A lot of bad people roamed about in public places, looking for vulnerable kids to prey on. Her saving grace was that I was the person her son met with.
The door barged open and immediately, Jake scrambled out of my legs.
"Mummy!!!"
My eyes were still trained on the floor and I caught sight of her manicured toes. One point for her because of the white polish, it was cute. Letting out a deep sigh, I stood to my feet and finally looked at the woman who was still crouched and hugging Jake.
The whole world came to an instant stop, my walls came tumbling down, a surge of noises rushed into my ears, my brain thudded against the cranium and when I finally spoke, my voice was a ghost of itself.
"Suzanne?"
