Chapter 1
Coming off my daily jog, I cut through the gardens as a short cut. I see the duck pond and children chasing the ducks around gleefully laughing. I see a group of teens smoking behind some high bushes as I make a corner.
I slow and wipe my face, I slow to a fast walk preparing for my cool down. When I clear the ‘smoking bushes’ I see the pavilion just ahead. It’s decorated beautifully with flowers and ribbons and a sign standing next to it.
HAPPY 5oth ANNIVERSARY JOHN and SUE.
I come to a slow walk, then stop in front of the sign. Fifty years. God, I can’t imagine loving someone and staying together for fifty years. That’s longer than I’ve been alive. Then the pain hits.
I’m a thirty year old, old maid. I’ve had two boyfriends, one in high school that moved out of the country to go to college and the other was about five years ago, who turned out to have another girlfriend and a wife!
Wouldn’t it be glorious to wake up next to the same man every morning. Laugh and joke together. Watch their children grow up, watch the grandchildren grow. To know that he loved you, had never lied or cheated.
Loved you. That would be the most amazing feeling.
People start to arrive at the gazebo. I step back and sit on a bench at a picnic table and just watch. They carry covered dishes and beautifully wrapped gifts. They are all so happy and laughing.
Children run in and out around them, little boys in dress shorts, nice shirts, some even have little ties on. The little girls dressed in fluffy little party dresses and bows in their hair. I wonder what generation they are? I bet some are even great grandkids.
An old man with a cane comes strolling up, his arm hooked with a beautiful woman of the same age. They look at one another with such love and adoration. Before she sits, he kisses her gently as she lays a hand on his cheek. Children run up to them laughing, hugging, kissing them. Forever love.
I feel a tear roll down my cheek and sniffle.
“A beautiful sight isn’t it?”
I jump at the sound of a man’s voice behind me. I turn to see a man with his food laid out in front of him. He smiles and nods at the party.
“I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to disturb you!” I jumped up.
“You’re not bothering me,” He chuckles.
“Care to join me? I have plenty.” he offers.
“No, no. I better get going,” I start walking.
“Miss! Miss, you forgot your water bottle,” he calls after me.
I turn and he’s holding it up. I walk back quickly.
“Thank you,” but when I reach for it he pulls it away.
“Join me. Please,” he smiles.
“I really can’t.”
His smile falls and he holds it out to me.
“I understand.”
The look on his face just strikes me as …sad. I take my bottle, glancing once more at the party, and jog away.
“Okay, so everybody say monkey!”
“Monkey!” I snap the shot.
“That’s wonderful! Thank you,” I shake hands with the clients, as kids scatter.
“When can we expect them back?” a little red haired woman beams.
“In about a week, I’ll text you and let you know.”
“Thank you,” a tall, sleek man shakes my hand.
I start gathering my equipment and getting it sorted away, making sure the film is sealed tight. I look at the time, I’m late. I’ll never hear the end of it. I grab my keys, lock up and take off running.
“You’re late!”
“Yes mother, I can tell time,” I wave the waitress over and order a large glass of wine.
“If you could tell time, you would have been on time!” she snaps.
“Mother please, can we have a civil meal for once in my life?” I take a huge drink of my wine.
“Leave the bottle,” I tell the waitress.
“Drinking this early in the day? And on an empty stomach?”
“Yes mother, I plan on getting piss drunk before this conversation is over,” I down the what's left in my glass, and quickly pour another.
“Really Gloria, I thought we raised you better than this,” she frowns.
“Watch it mother, you’ll break your Botox. Looking lovely by the way,” I air toast and take a drink.
“Why must you be such a rude and disrespectful child? You’re just like your father,” she touches her napkin to her lips.
“I guess you just bring out the best in me,” I rub my brow.
“And what in heaven’s name are you wearing? Everything you have is on blatant display!”
“They are called leggings and they are perfectly acceptable.Why are we here mother?” I take a drink.
“Your father is gone.”
“Okay, so where’d he go?” another drink.
“He’s dead, Gloria.”
My glass stops midway to my lips. It takes a second for her statement to sink in. I slowly sit it down and look at the pompous, smug look on my mothers perfectly made up face.
“Come again?”
“Your father died this morning at St. Andrews hospital.”
“Daddy, daddy. I love you this much!”
“I love you this much!”
“I love you to the moon and back!”
“I love you to the end of time!”
“Gloria! Did you hear me?”
I snap out of it and look at the strange woman who calls herself my mother.
“What? No, what did you say?” I down the wine in my glass.
“You need to make the arrangements as soon as possible. I need this done and taken care of by the end of the week. I’m leaving for Milan on Sunday.”
My mind snaps.
“You are a cold bitch. You were his wife for twenty five years! And you are worried about running off to Milan?”
“Gloria, your father and I parted ways nine years ago. I have another life with a husband I love and I will be joining him in Milan on Sunday. So grow up and take responsibility!”
I stand and look her dead in the eye.
“I hope you are happy with your new life, new husband and your time spent in Milan. Just think, you can tell them you have such a perfect figure because you never had children!” I turn and leave.
“Gloria! How dare you!” I hear her call after me.
I push the door open and slam right into a hard chest.
“Move!”
“Pardon me,” the man chuckles.
I ran out, ignoring his remark. The water garden is across from the restaurant and I head there. I sit on a low wall and squall my eyes out.
“I know it’s hard to understand Angel, but sometimes people just fall out of love and it’s better to be away from each other before someone really gets hurt.”
“Will you fall out of love with me daddy?”
“Oh God, no Angel. I will never fall out of love with you. I will love you until the end of time.”
“I guess it’s the end of time daddy.”
My dad had been sick for almost a year: colon cancer that had spread. It broke my heart every time I went to see him. He had been aware and in good spirits. I guess it just became too much for him.
“Are you alright?”
I jump and look at the man from the park a couple of weeks ago. I rub my face and sniffle.
“I’m fine, thank you.”
“You just looked so distraught, I was concerned.”
“Do you always go around trying to rescue damsels in distress?”
“It’s a bad habit of mine,” he chuckles softly.
“Well, this damsel will be just fine. Thank you for your concern,” I stand and walk away.
“Do you always turn your back on someone who tries to care?”
“Wouldn’t know, it’s never happened before,” I called back over my shoulder. I take off running as hard as I can. Daddy cared, he was the only one that ever had. By the time I reached my house, I was a blubbering idiot.
I stand looking at a wall of my father. Pictures I had taken of him once I started my own studio three years ago. He was my rock when I feared I couldn't do it, he was always there for me.
It was a beautiful service. So many of his friends and work associates were in attendance. I found out exactly how much he was loved. My mother left like a bullet as soon as the church service was over, she didn't even bother going to the grave site. I've not spoken with her since.
“I am so excited! I think I’m gonna pop!” Nan squeals.
Nan Cooper, my somewhat excitable assistant. We went to high school together. She was a stoner then and sometimes I wonder about her now.
“Me too.”
“Come on Gloria, he wouldn’t want you to be moping around like this, he is so proud of you,” she hugs me.
“I know. I just thought he would be here for this,” I feel the tears sting my eyes.
“He is sweetie,” she kisses my cheek.
“Miss Timber, should we open the doors now?”
I look at the clock.
“Yes, the show must go on,” I chuckle and look at my dad once more.
“Welcome. I am pleased so many of you have shown interest in my work and many of you will find yourself on these very walls. Welcome to Memories.” I spend the next thirty minutes taking them on a tour and the remainder of the evening they browse.
I made two sales and made appointments for three shoots. Pretty good for a first showing.
As I lock up, I see an elderly couple walking hand in hand, softly talking and smiling at one another. Watching them pass by, I feel a tear roll down my cheek.
“God bless you.”
The man turns and smiles over his shoulder.
“He has.”
I hadn’t realized I had said that out loud.
