Lunatic Laundry

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Summary

This twisted yarn unravels over the course of one strange day in West Texas when Sara, a young rehab inmate, completes her destiny to become the most powerful representative of God’s will on Earth.

Status
Complete
Chapters
14
Rating
n/a
Age Rating
18+

Prologue

The old man glared at the coyote. He’d never really liked the creature to begin with, but it had recently begun to seriously mess with his mind.

What are you thinking, shithead?

The man stroked his long gray beard and leaned back on the wooden stump upon which he sat. He relaxed against the wall of the cave where he had resided for most of his long life.

Do you know what I’m thinking?

Coyote sat up. She stared back at the man. She had never really liked him all that much either. It had been oceans of time since she had found him wandering lost and confused in the desert. She’d known immediately that he was the next chosen one, albeit by mistake, so she had tried to offer him some companionship to ease the effects of that error. However, had she known he would turn out to be a misogynistic, self hating masturbator content to brood in this cave she would have left him to bake until crispy brown in the brutal desert sun. She marveled at the fact that he would spend a whole day spanking it and the whole night asking his half baked idea of a god for forgiveness. In her opinion he was a sad sack of a man, riddled by guilt from an ideology that forbade him to be human. What a waste of time.

Thankfully, he had recently become suicidal. This pleased Coyote greatly, though she knew his power would have to pass to another when his time finally came.

The man studied her closely. Coyote’s amber eyes peered whimsically into his sallow dark orbs. Lost in her gaze the man’s hand absently drifted from his beard to his crotch, where he cupped his nards in an unconscious act of self preservation. He sat there blankly holding his jewels for some time before he collected another cognitive thought.

It makes no difference either way what you think or what I think. I’m done.

The man rose to his feet. The shadows of the cave’s depths merged into darkness behind him as he strode to the entrance. He looked down from atop his mesa at an endless desert sparsely garnished with cobalt sage. He raised his hands into the air. In the sky above, storm clouds formed into thundery clusters crackling with electricity.

Slowly, the dark clouds grew into a wall many miles long and drifted lazily across the sage prairie.