Chapter One
Final Version*
Share with your friends
Customize readability
Ex Siderum
All Rights Reserved ©
Summary
Can a mysterious fallen star help Calypso come to terms with her family's past, or will they both discover more than they'd anticipated? Six years have passed since Calypso took her father's place as captain of the Neptune's Deceit after his unexpected descent into madness. Still haunted by her mother and brother's murder, one by her father's hands and the other, unwittingly, on her own, Calypso's life is changed when they pull a half-dead man from the sea. Impossible to kill and going by the name of Pisces, he instantaneously undoes everything the pirate queen had worked for. Together, they must navigate through a complex relationship forced upon them by the possession of two seemingly harmless necklaces. In the process, Calypso is forced to face the reality of her true identity and that of the stranger she brought upon her ship.
Let Eleanor Suede know what you thought about this chapter!
fullstops_n_questionmarks
What an interesting concept! Totally distinctive and invigorating. Your writing moves like water over stones...very flowy and skillful. Good Job!
8 years
𝐒𝐇𝑨𝐑
This is a very strong opening chapter. I like how we get to learn about Calypso through the dream at the beginning. Your writing is incredibly gripping and I can't wait to find out what'll happen in the next chapter!
8 years
Barry Litherland
That's an intriguing opening with a nice hook at the end to ensure any reader would want to read on. Already we have a back story to the central character and some insight into her nature. She's someone the reader could easily develop an interest in - essential if they're going to read on. The written style is strong and draws the reader into the plot. If I were to offer any advice I'd suggest avoiding modifiers like 'almost as if' - They weaken the simile and are often completely unnecessary. You may also want to cull a few adjectives and adjectival phrases and adverbs where they impede the flow of this exciting and interesting narrative. Sometimes description takes the reader away from the story rather than helping unfold it. These are minor points - author to author - and you may disagree. I merely raise them as something to consider. I'm looking forward to reading on. This is refreshingly good.
8 years
Further Recommendations
vaginaolento6000: I love the plot, and am really into stories where the main character is an anti hero. Sinve Englis is not my first language, it is sometimes very difficult to follow the text. I find the text much more complex and richer with vocabulary than with books i usually read. I wish i could've understood so...
Read Now
BellaCass: I find that it is more a retelling of a situation rather than a storytelling. If that makes any sense. It's almost like when you're talking to your friend and you're just telling them what happened in a situation instead of fabricating a story that you would tell your child. I kind of like it.
Read Now
johannak: Let me start by saying that there are a ridiculous (lol) number of chapters which most will find daunting, UNTIL you take them a few at a time like a combined series of books. If you love Game of Thrones or the Lord of the Rings be prepared to get hooked in the variety & depth of characters & sub-pl...
Read Now
Sara: This book had a u pique storyline. I enjoyed reading it!
Read Now
loveisalie: I won't give anything away with this review, as I believe you should read it yourself. I very much enjoyed the story and would recommend the book to anyone looking for a good story. I saw some minor technical difficulties, but nothing that would distract from the story. All in all, with a little po...
Read Now
Chantelle Keall: I totally loved reading it, but disappointed about the way it ended
Read Now
costner1974: I'm interested in this book. I like how it's started thus far. When will it continue? Please respond as soon as possible. Thank you
Read Now
Benjamin: The story and writing were great. Almost as impactful as Stephen King. I was impressed by there being few spelling and grammatical errors. You leave the reading wanting more just as J.K. Rolling does.
Read Now