Borrowing
At the break of dawn, he gets up, rubs his eyes vigorously with his fingers, and immediately walks to his bathroom to get ready for his day job. As he makes his coffee, he stares into the deep darkness of his black coffee. He is attractive, middle aged, well built; with medium-long dark hair and dark eyes. Slender face with a groomed beard. Although he is gloomy, he is very satisfied with his bachelor life. Little does he know, all that is about to change.
As he tightens the laces in his boots, his mind carelessly drifts with memories of times his mother taught him how to lace and tie his shoes. He can’t recall why he thinks of his mother at this point in time, but he carries on, grabs his few belongings, and leaves his apartment.
In a construction site, several miles from his home, he’s checking off a list on a clipboard, supervising the men at work. He dusts off some dirt from his badge that reads: ETHAN W. and begins walking to his office. Ethan’s days are always the same; tedious, unchanging, and dreary. Although this may be undesirable to some, to Ethan, it’s a vacation. Ethan has many secrets, however; a mystery to many people close to him, he blends in perfectly with the seven hundred thousand residents of Seattle. Ethan does not drive to work, he prefers to take public transportation. Without specifying a good reason, since he owns a vehicle, he always tells his friends and family that he simply prefers to ride a train to work.
On this day, however, he will miss his stop.
As he gets on the train, he takes a seat next to an elderly woman who smiles at him. She gets off at the next stop. Ethan has twelve stops before getting to his destination. He notices everyone on their phones, not paying attention to the world around them. Ethan is very alert; always scanning and noticing small details. He never mindlessly looks at a phone. His attention is suddenly grabbed by a young woman, late twenties possibly early thirties, standing and reading a Reader’s Digest Select Editions.
Strange, he thought, I never see young people reading those books. Ethan notices the fairness of her skin and how attractive she is to him. He is not usually attracted to younger women, especially since so many have lost touch with reality and are consumed by the world of social media. Yet, this young woman is so fetching in her own way. Her hair is long and dark, with a subtle wave to it, her legs are comfortably covered by dark, opaque stockings. She wears a modest dark blue skirt with a button up white shirt, and a black wool-knitted sweater. As the train comes to an abrupt stop, she loses balance and almost falls over.
A young man catches her and she thanks him. The young man tries to strike a conversation with her, seemingly interested in her, the woman turns her head slightly, rolls her eyes and excuses herself. Ethan is amused by her innate sensibility, and chuckles to himself. The young woman pulls her hoodie over her head and takes a seat next to Ethan. She opens her book, delicately with her small fingers, pulling out her bookmark and continuing her reading. Ethan doesn’t want to seem like the young man who attempted to flirt with her, but wants desperately to speak to this alluring woman. As she turns a page, he clears his throat softly, and prepares to move his lips.
“Excuse me-” Ethan says as softly as he can. The woman turns her head towards him with dazed eyes that look as if she has just been woken up. “I’m sorry, I don’t mean to interrupt you, but-”
“No, you’re fine,” the woman says, equally soft in her tone of voice.
“That book,” Ethan says as he points to her book, “I haven’t seen anyone carry those books in a long time, mind if I ask why you chose it?”
The woman smiles after closing her book. “My Dad, he used to collect them, and he gave them to me. I always told myself I would read them, and-” she begins to look down, sorrowfully, “I recently decided to start reading them.” She looks back up with her clear hazel eyes and gives a half hearted smile.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bring any-”
“No, it’s all right, I’m over it by now,” she says as she traces the spine of her book with her forefinger. The train operator announces Ethan’s upcoming stop, but he doesn’t listen to it; he is too captivated by this young woman. “Do you like these compilations as well?”
“My mother collects them, I only read one of the books in her collection, but I’m not an avid reader,” Ethan explains in his much more casual tone of voice; very deep and austere. They carry on with their conversations, receiving glares from the young man who tried to converse with the young woman.
Ethan paid attention to every detail of her smile and laugh. They spoke of the different books they liked, the types of coffee and teas they preferred. The young woman was unabashed by talking to this gentleman who was not trying to make a pass at her. Of course, Ethan was attractive in his own right and was not swayed to flirt with the woman. They merely spoke, and had a connection. After a few minutes passed, and Ethan glimpsed at the sunset, he quickly realized he missed his stop.
“I’m so sorry, I gotta get off and turn around, I missed my stop,” Ethan says as he rises from his seat, and the woman shuts her eyes as she blushes bashfully.
“I’m so sorry,” she says with a smile. Ethan smiles and looks at his watch.
“I guess we can continue this conversation another time?” Ethan asks as he holds tightly to the hand rail. The young woman pulls out a permanent marker and begins jotting down something on her bookmark, closes the book and hands it to Ethan.
“What’s this?” he asks. She smiles before shyly looking down, almost flirtatiously.
“I’m lending you the book, my name and number are on the bookmark, so you can return it to me,” she says as she looks deep into Ethan's dark eyes with her clear hazel eyes. Obviously hinting that she wants to see him again, Ethan thanks her, neither one breaking eye contact, until the train finally stops.
"I'll definitely do that," Ethan says to her as the doors open, an older man is disgruntled and hurriedly pushes Ethan aside. He's not fazed by it and steps out, continuing to stare at her as the train takes off; the young woman smiles and waves at Ethan. After the train is clear from sight, he quickly opens the book to find the bookmark, and reads: Cara, call me on my cell... 555-627-6556.
He stops to read the name again: "Cara," Ethan softly says to himself. He catches the next train heading towards his destination. Upon arriving home, Ethan puts the book on his bedside table, and prepares to do his daily exercises. Pull ups on an installed hand bar above his hallway entrance, crunches, push ups, and a quick jog around his block. He has kept up with his exercise for a long time in an effort to stay healthy and prepared.
Ethan, as well as staying in shape, is always prepared. He has concealed weapons in every room. Not a paranoid, conspiracy nut, just aware. Over the years, in his prime, he made a lot of enemies. He never talks about it with his friends or family, but he disappeared for many years; leaving loved one's behind and worried. When he suddenly showed up at his mother's door, she was overjoyed. She did not care to know what he did, all she knew was that shortly after joining the military, he disappeared. But, when he came home after so long, she only wanted to spend time with him. Ethan's mother carefully explained to his friends and younger brother, not to question him about where he'd been.
Ethan carried on with his life, trying not to look back. But, it still haunted him. He always dated women, never promising his mother any grandchildren, but never truly settling down. The idea of marriage never crossed his mind. He is constantly worried of the trouble it may cause if he had more people to care about, more liability and leverage against him. He swore to take his past to the grave. A past full of secrets, deceit, lies, hiding, massive knowledge of how to get out of really tight situations and creating weapons from almost anything. Ethan has tried his best to maintain a low profile and always stay on the alert. He also does his best to not get distracted. But even he knows he is only human, and longs to have a normal life as anyone else would.
Starting over in Seattle, he has hopes to keep his past behind him. At the very least, he knew no one would come looking for him. After so many years in absolute peace and tranquility, the idea of settling down with an intelligent and incredibly sexy woman, is enticing even to him. Having spent so much time training and studying his surroundings, he has no need to be as paranoid as he was at the beginning of this new life. He is certain no one knows his whereabouts, who his family is, and where he is living now. The few friends he has left are aware that he wants to maintain this lifestyle and they never pressure him to expose himself more to new people because of his paranoia.
Therefore, he feels comfortable getting to know Cara. The sound of her name makes the excitement in his loins rise like it never has before; not just her looks, but her voice, her perfume, her engaged and intelligent mind, and the way she bit her bottom lip as Ethan spoke to her. Almost as if she is on her way home to express that sexual frustration as well. The second Ethan arrives home, he forgets to push in the code to his alarm system in his rush to release his sexual desires, and immediately jumps out the bathroom to punch in the pin. As he drops to the floor in relief, he begins to laugh at the whole situation.
Am I really feeling something I have never felt in this life thus far? He thinks to himself as he rubs his forehead, and looks up at his large window facing the city.
After a long stare and serious contemplation, he returns to his bathroom and does what he intended to do when he first walked in; masturbating until his frustration is released. He believes after releasing the feeling of lust, he will not feel so fogged up in his mind, which he dislikes. But he doesn't. The desire is there, the next day, and the day after that. No matter how many times he releases the urge, or how many boxes of tissue he goes through, he desires her more and more with each passing day.
I should call her, he finally decides, and begins to make the call after making his dinner in his kitchen on the sixth day after meeting Cara.
Ethan is unsure of where this new love interest will lead him towards. After five years of peace living in Seattle, he finally feels as though he can move on, and maybe even someday settle down.
