What is your opinion?
So exciting!
"I really like your style of writing and of course the story itself. Even though you're only at the beginning I'm already intrigued. I love how much development the characters already have, I'm a sucker for characters and it's my favorite part of every story so a story like this that focuses a lot on characters is easily going to be a favorite a man. Some things you could think about is to refer to characters by their name when there are more than two people in a conversation. Sometimes you use "she" a lot and since there's a lot of females in this story it can be a little confusing sometimes. And like basically everyone there are a few grammar mistakes here and there but they're easy to fix with a re-read of the chapters and the help of a grammar checker, I personally use Grammarly. I hope any of this helped and motivated you to keep writing this story! /Hannah"
Thrilling
"I really like your story so far! It starts off immediately which just makes you want to read more of it. I love how the different characters have their own unique personality, it brings more depth to the story. Also how we get to read the perspectives from different characters. I like how you don’t tell the whole history of the characters, leaving the reader wondering and wanting to read more to find out what has happened and the reasons to why certain things took place. I really love your writing style and the use of different adjectives and adverbs to describe the scene. But I noticed that you tend to use the word “she” a lot which can be confusing some times as several female characters interact with each other. Sometimes I don’t who’s doing what. I would recommend putting in the name of the character more often to clarify who you’re referring to. As I read I also noticed some minor grammar mistakes which can be fixed easily. I personally use Grammarly. I would also recommend copying your text into google translate and listen to it, it is a great way to find small mistakes. I can’t wait to see what’s going to happen next and keep up the good work! /Alma"
GREAT story
"*Internally screaming and gasping for air* Title - it raises questions and it's catchy. Blurb - I think that it's amazing. You get a sense of the story as well as it raises interest. Chapters and overall - I love your writing style. And I think that the chapters are well constructed and makes you wanna read more. sometimes the sentences are hard to understand but it is nothing a reread can't solve. I was really drawn towards this story because it seemed like the badass feminine story that I am missing. Often femininity is seen as something bad or something that makes you weak, and I really hope that this is the story to change that. I would like some more detailed descriptions but I think that you have thought of that and that they are coming in the following chapters. Keep up the good work and publish soon, I'll be anxiously awaiting next update. Take care and best wishes! /Emilia :)"
Great start!
"This story seems interesting so far, I'm intrigued to see what happens next! Since there's only 2 chapters, it is hard to give a full review, but great start, it has a lot of potential!"
Intrigueing
"I'd say something different and new"
Intriguing!
"This is a wonderful beginning. There is obviously some wonderful drama going on here and I look forward to hearing from all of the ladies eventually. The emotion - angst, guilt and need to be what they are not - is fascinating. Yes, a few edits are needed, here and there, but I am looking forward to reading more."
Great first chapter
"Steady character development - sympathetic conflict and strength development - shown in this one chapter. Not much chance for plot realization, but there's strong potential. Currently reads like a well development Young Adult novella. Overall, a strong first chapter, that may benefit from some minor edits for clarity."
