Lemon

Alana

“What in the name of the great almighty Artemis is this fresh hell?” I glare up at the dilapidated monstrosity staring back at me, with dark windows like dead hollow eyes and Its sun-yellowed paint peeling off like the skin of some demented zombie, in utter dismay. I’m so pissed at my mom that I could spit fireballs out of my ass and launch myself right up and away from the sight in front of me.

The shingles sagging, roof tiles missing in haphazard spots and the once beautiful front porch looking like one step would bring you crashing through the rotten boards. I should have known better when my mother convinced me to buy this property for next to nothing after I refused to move back in with her, after…well… just after.

“I was a serial killer in my previous life. This is karma coming to get me.” I bury my face in my hands and allow myself a few moments of self-pity before sucking it up like a big girl. “Oh’ well…new beginnings, small blessings, when in need and all that crap.” I scrunch my toes into the soft white sand that made its way into my sandals, pick up my duffel and make my way up the path to my new home.

I don’t know what Mrs. Alder was thinking when she let me buy this property and why she didn’t leave it to…him, but I am in no position to look this particularly sick, ungifted, horse in the mouth. Not after what that coward, Daniel, and Lucyfer herself did to me. I look down at the cracked, green, wood of the first step onto my new porch with trepidation.

I can already see a clear image in my mind of how my body would crash through the rotten wood, being impaled and left for dead, only to be carried away by crabs into the ocean crashing behind me. If only. Well, my meddling mother could save me the humiliation of laying here too long. She is probably already on her way to start redecorating what I am sure is an absolute horror show of an interior.

“Hold on to your tits, Alana! We’re going in.” The wood creaks under my feet and I thankfully make it to the front door without death, impalement, or injury. I nearly dislocated my shoulder trying to turn the rusted key in an even more rusted lock and fall into the foyer of my new home with the grace of a newborn fawn when I had to shove the water-logged door with my shoulder to get it to open.

“A Lemon. I’ve bought a bloody lemon.” And the thing is going to kill me so I can join Dad up in heaven where he is probably laughing his ass off at me. Gid…no, Haven’s main fuckboy, must be pissing himself at my expense. I just keep laying on the hardwood floor, staring up at the peeling paint on the ceiling, pondering the choices I’ve made in my life, when a gruff voice breaks me out of my pity party. “What the hell are you doing?” I wave my hand in the air with a dismissive flick, not getting up or looking at the rude stranger whose shadow is now falling over me like a dark specter. Maybe he’ll do me a favor and murder me while he’s here.

“Oh, nothing really. Just practicing my death pose. Do you think I should cross my arms over my chest? You know? Like an Egyptian mummy or go with a dramatic pose and splay out my arms like the victims on CSI.” His gruff chuckle rolls over me while I strike the pose to reiterate my point.

Stupid questions deserve stupid answers. So yeah, don’t ask me dumb shit. I look up at him and the silhouette of a behatted, giant stands in front of me, surrounded by the waning daylight outside, making it impossible to make out his features.

“Can I help you?” My patience is wearing thin with the man rubbing a large palm over his mouth, still chuckling at me like I’m a prized dancing monkey. I push myself up from the floor, dusting off enough dust bunnies to stuff a pillow. Just knowing that my Auburn hair is filled with anything and everything that was laying around on this dust-covered floor. Hello allergic reaction. Table for one.

“Jesus, you haven’t changed a bit, have you? Still my crazy little Laney.” My body stiffens as I look up from where I’ve been removing splinters, from the worn hardwood floor, from my butt cheeks. “What the hell did you just call me?” I squint my eyes and finally and horrifically start to make out the far too familiar, stupidly attractive, facial features of the biggest dick-swinging fucker in the little town of Haven. My hometown and the reason I left as fast as my feet could carry me.

I should have known this would happen. I glare at his square jaw, blue eyes and can clearly picture the wavy, blond locks hidden under that ball cap that he has been wearing since birth. He has put on some bulk over the years, but clearly still keeps in shape, obviously still favoring those ridiculous jeans and black t-shirts that look like they have been vacuum-packed to fit against his body. It’s disgusting really. I’m not into it. At all. Nope. Not one bit.

“Aw, come on little Laney. Don’t tell me you don’t remember me? You’ll break my heart.” He mocks me while placing the ham he calls a hand on his chest. His very ripped chest. I hate it and I’ll break more than his fucking heart if he doesn’t get his STD-riddled ass away from me and off my property.

I decide to play dumb, just to piss him off, because who wouldn’t remember the great and glorious, Gideon Alder? Local heart-breaker, bully, and football star Golden-Boy. This son of a bitch is the fucking bane of my existence.

“I’m sorry, I really don’t. Who are you again? Is that you Brent?” I throw out the name of one of the skinniest, nerdiest, and most obnoxious kids I can remember from high school and watch in delight as a frown crosses his face when I confuse him with the nasally little rat-faced weasel.

“You know very well who I am Alana. Don’t start your smart-ass shit with me. We’ve lived next to each other for years. You look like death warmed over by the way.” I can practically hear my teeth grinding themselves in too little nubs as I take his insult like a champ. Like I am used to doing by now. I’m not that helpless teenager anymore. I’ll end him.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, how may I help you, sir? I already know Jesus and I won’t be buying Tupperware or a new Hoover at this moment.” I walk over to slam the door in his face and his hand shoots out and stops me from breaking his nose with it. Dammit. Next time.

“Oh, how I’ve missed your smart mouth, Baby. But that’s not why I’m here.” He shoves past me and walks into my home as if he was born with the God-given right to do it. Well, he probably was, but definitely not anymore. I know it is shitty and will probably kill me while I try to salvage it before it is condemned, but it is still mine.

“Uh, excuse me, but can you get your ass out of my house? I’ve got things to do and places to be that, thank the heavens up above, do not involve your presence. I’m sure the town is missing their Golden Boy and I’m in no mood to go to jail for murder and/or maiming tonight.” He turns and looks at me as that irritatingly handsome and impish grin, I am so familiar with, crosses over his stupid face.

“So, you do remember me little Laney, and here I was getting my feelings hurt over nothing.” I ball my fists at my side. This is him, Gideon, fucking, Alder. The guy who did his absolute best to make my life a living hell. My nose starts to twitch and my eyes will no doubt start to water in a few seconds from the dust still caked on me from my fall, just adding to my irritation.

A day. That is all I asked for before facing this town and him again. But of course. I am Alana Grayson. Life likes fucking with me just as much as Gideon does. “Don’t you dare call me that. I am not your little-fucking-Laney. My name is Alana. So, state your business and get the hell away from my home.” He sobers in the face of my anger, a confused expression and that bloody attractive frown scrunching up his face. What the hell did he expect? That I would throw myself in his arms and weep in joy.

“Well, Alana,” He emphasizes my name with a snarl and I nearly deck him. “I’m here to drop off your spare keys. Mom found them in my Nan’s things and knew that the new owner would be arriving today. If I knew it, was you, I would have chucked it into the ocean.” He stalks towards me with a scowl on his face, dropping the keys at my feet like the inconsiderate dick that he is. Promptly swinging around and stomping towards the door in a huff. Hopefully, the rotten wood will take him out just to do me a favor. He suddenly pauses just before crossing the threshold, His hand on the door keeping his back to me. “You should get that dust cleaned off you. Don't be stupid and fuck around with your allergies.” I just scowl at his broad back. I’m sure he can feel the daggers embedding themselves in his back from my glare.

I nearly do not hear the next words that come out of his mouth, making my heart flop and my breath hitch, as I watch his shoulders droop and a sigh leave his body. “You’ll always be my little Laney to me.” With that, he shuts the door with a thud that resembles the one my heart made at his words. I curse my traitorous heart and squint my eyes at the door. “Not this time, fucker. Not this time.”