Chapter 1
Hello.
My name is Crayon.
I have joined a writing club, and if I don’t come up with a story then I will not seem cool to the other members of the club.
I must seem cool to them.
I simply must.
And so I’m gonna write a story to get my cool-cred up.
They say that it doesn’t matter how good the story is, I just have to come up with something.
Okay, so I’m thinking that I have to have barbies in the story, because girls won’t like the story unless there are barbies in it.
I also have to have farting jokes in the story, because guys only like stories that have farting jokes in it.
So…
Farting barbies?
Sounds good.
Now, it’s seeming that this might put me into fanfiction territory, and I’m gonna call this fanfiction just to be safe.
Okay, time to start writing…
“So, a barbie named Beauty was getting dressed one day, and suddenly she farted!
As the smell wafted up to her nostrils, she was very unhappy because she didn’t like it.
And so she called up her barbie friend who was named Beast, and she asked him to meet up with her quick!
He raced! over to her house, and the fact that he was farting a lot as he ran helped him go faster.
When he arrived at her abode, he said, “Hey, Beaut!, what’s up?”
She began crying, and she informed him that she had farted earlier on and not liked the smell of it.
Suddenly!, she farted again!, and her face reddened in embarrassment!
He had heard the fart, and so he decided to see if it smelled bad or not.
Once the smell reached his nostrils, he pondered for a second and said, “Smells great to me!
And then he confessed that he too had been farting earlier that day.
“You wanna smell my farts too?” he asked; and she sighed and said that she may as well.
Beast farted, and Beauty did not like how his fart smelled.
It actually smelled pretty similar to how her fart had smelled.
And so she decided to just tell him that his fart smelled like her fart, which was still truthful but was less harsh than telling him that his fart had smelled bad.
“Thanks!” he said, “I’m honored to have my farts compared to yours!
Btw, you wanna go on a date?”
“Sounds good to me!” Beauty said; but then she paused and said, “Are we exclusive now, or are we still considering other people while we date?”
Beast paused, and then he said, “Ya know what?, f dating!
How about we get married!
Closed marriage.
Just you, me, and our farts!”
Beauty wasn’t sure about the farts part, but getting married did seem a lot less confusing and chaotic than dating, and so she said, “Should we go find a religious leader to pronounce us wife and husband then?” and Beast said, “Sounds good to me!” and the two of them set off in search of a religious leader.
They soon ran into an imam, and Beauty said, “Mr. Imam!
Please! Will you pronounce us husband and wife?”
The imam nodded solemnly, and said, “Do you two take each other to be wife and husband?” and Beast and Beauty both said, “I do!”
“Very good.” the imam said, “You are now husband and wife.”
The imam looked like he was about to say something else, but then he suddenly heard them fart, and he said, “Did you two just fart?”
“We sure did!” Beast said happily, as Beauty’s face reddened in embarrassment.
“Well, I suppose that it is a natural thing that our bodies do.” the imam said, “But I do have important matters to attend to and so I must leave.
May your marriage be blessed, and may Allah guide you both as you make your way through life!”
Beauty and Beast thanked the Imam, and they headed off to go on a date!
When they reached the local cafe, a waitress greeted them, and then they heard her fart!
“Sorry about that!” she said, “Can I take your order?”
“It’s okay.” Beauty said, even though she felt like she was about throw up because the fart smelled so bad.
“We just got married!” Beast said cheerfully; and the waitress got a very happy look on her face, and she said, “I’ll make you a deal!
If you can convince the waiter over there to marry me then your order is free!”
Beauty and Beast agreed to the deal, and so the waitress winked at them and left so that the waiter would have to take their order.
When the waiter reached them, he said, “Hello, may I take your order?” and then he farted!
Beauty did not like the smell of the fart, but she bravely managed to say, “We’d both like today’s special!
Also, Beast and I just got married!”
“Nice!” the waiter said; and Beast said, “Thanks!
We’re very glad that we decided to take the plunge!”
Then Beauty added that, “That waitress over there seems cute.
Maybe you two should get married!”
“Idk.” the waiter said, “Maybe.” and he walked off.
Soon, the waitress brought Beast and Beauty their orders and said that the waiter had proposed to her!
“That means that your food is free!” she said happily, and Beauty and Beast grinned and thanked her for the free food!
Just then a HUGE monster barbie walked by the cafe and farted through the window as he passed!
The fart smelled so bad that everyone passed out and didn’t wake up for a while.
While they were all passed out, the HUGE barbie grabbed them all and put them into a little cage.
“These shall make good pets!” the HUGE barbie said, and the HUGE barbie farted again and then began walking towards the castle that he lived at with his wife…”
“Hmmm…” I said to myself, “I guess that’s probably good for chapter 1.
I’m not gonna lie, the story might not exactly be the best tale ever, but it at least gives me a story to be able to present to the other writers.
Plus!, the tale’s just getting started!
It’ll get more interesting as the story goes on.
Hopefully…”
And so I printed what I had, and I decided that I’d write more of it up the next day…
