Phobia

“A Strange new drug has hit the air… Literally. An airborne pathogen has been released sometime in the last 12 hours and causes mass hallucinations. People have been reported phobias including, but not limited to, extreme claustrophobia, coulrophobia, hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia, mysophobia, arachnophobia, panophobia, agoraphobia, nosophobia, zoophobia, hemophobia, trypophobia, rhabdophobia, necrophobia, and tetraphobia just to name a few. Where has this drug come from and how do we stop it? People have been warned to stay inside while the CDC tries to come up with a plan to cure those affected. This  is Stella White, Channel 3 news…”

Huh… Some of those phobias are oddly specific… The fear of the number 4? Really? And who has a fear of long words unless they are worried about failing a test?

So, he did it, I realized with a sad sigh. All this because of Cora. He’s been in love with her for years. When she broke his heart last month, he promised revenge. But what is the point? Is she really worth all of this?

I begged him to reconsider. So many people would be hurt in his irrational mission to punish his girlfriend that only lasted about a week. Well, 4 days. That was when she realized it wouldn’t work and there was something definitely wrong with him.

I can’t say that I blame her. They were not good together. She was completely wrong for him, but she is beautiful and he is obsessive. There is something wrong with him, just like she said. It’s his warped sense of humor and his aptitude for getting into trouble. But he is a genius and should not be challenged.

I’ve been friends with him for forever. He was always bullied. The kids would call him names like nerd and geek, or even brainiac, then they would push him down and kick him. He was pretty scrawny when he was younger…

But I would always fight his bullies off for him, sometimes ending up getting beaten up myself, in the process. I guess you could say that I’m a tom-boy. I don’t mind fighting for him. Even now, after he’s bulked up due to excessive exercise, I still stand up for him.

He’s never looked at me the way he looked at Cora. And that’s fine. I am fine not being his girlfriend. Being his best friend is good enough for me. Maybe someday I’ll find an actual boyfriend who appreciates me… I don’t know if that will happen because most guys are scared of me.

For the last month he’s been locked up in his parent’s basement working on his Ultimate Drug he calls ‘Phobia.’  He thought it would be funny to make everyone run around scared of things like clowns and start to hallucinate when there really wasn’t anything chasing them.

I happen to be a psych major and I’m worried about the panic this is gonna cause. Fear is not something to be messed around with! It will cause havoc and people will start behaving irrationally.

It’s like high school boys in a school gym, once one of them does something stupid the others wanna get in on it, and then pure chaos! I don’t wanna go through that again! I hated high school!

I warned him many people would be hurt because of it, but he brushed me off. He never listens to me when I am trying to help him and prove my point! It’s like my opinion doesn’t even matter to him! Stubborn man!

I even tried to warn his parents. But Mindy and Jack both said Jeremy was 22 years old and they didn’t have the obligation to babysit him anymore. What is that supposed to mean? They are his parents! What kind of parent would just look the other way when their child really needs their help? That is completely irresponsible of them!

Don’t get me wrong. Mindy and Jack are great. They love him and all… It’s just, they’ve been dealing with Jer’s insecurities and trouble making tendencies for his whole life. But when he hit 21, they wiped their hands of him. Now he is still living at their house, going to college. He is working on a degree to become a microbiologist.

I wonder how long this idea has been cooking up in his brain and just needed an excuse to execute it…

Suddenly, my door crashes open and in barges my best friend. He is heaving as if he’d been running the whole way here. He has a manic look in his eye. This can’t be good…

“I did it Libby!” He announces, as if I hadn’t been listening to the news reports all morning long. All I’ve heard about all freaking morning is people screaming that “The End Is Coming! The Zombies are taking over the world!” But there were no signs of these supposed zombies! I seriously don’t know if that would be considered necrophobia or some other TV induced phobia I’ve never heard of?

“I know,” I sigh. I am really depressed, but he doesn’t even seem to notice how I feel. I’ve never had a phobia. I’ve never even been afraid of the dark, so his drug won’t work on me. It only enhances the fears that one already has…

“Aren’t you gonna congratulate me?” he asks, looking confused by my lack of enthusiasm for his ‘practical joke’. Seriously? Congratulate him when I’ve been begging on my hands and knees for him to stop this madness?!

“NO!” I growl at him.

Jeremy looks startled and taken aback. How can he not understand? For being a genius, he sure can be an ignoramus sometimes!

“Why?” he pouts, even more confused and slightly frustrated.

“Did you not hear me the first million times I warned you not to do this? People are gonna get hurt! Our friends are gonna suffer for some stupid revenge on a girl who was completely wrong for you! You only wanted her because she was beautiful, not because you guys got along! And what if she doesn’t even have a fear? You would have done it all for nothing!” I practically shouted my rant at him.

“I thought you were joking…” he looks unsure now.

I was joking? REALLY???

“What about that was I joking about? How is people getting hurt funny?” I try to restrain my frustration, taking deep calming breaths.

“Well… It will go away on its own…” he says, as if that is reassuring.

“Yeah, but the CDC doesn't know that! People who are hiding under their beds don’t know that! How long will it last?” I finally ask in defeat.

“48 hours,” he whispers.

“48 hours of fear. How would that make you feel, Jer? You have a fear! You have trypanophobia! How would you feel if a phlebotomist came at you with a huge frickin’ needle right now?” I growl out.

“That won’t happen,” he says with a triumphant grin. “I gave myself the antidote!”

As If I’m supposed to be impressed with this nonsense! I am so frustrated right now I could strangle him!

I grab his shirt sleeve and drag him out the front door.

The first thing I see is my poor neighbor, Ashley running away trying to swat away some invisible assailant.

“The butterflies are attacking! Run for your lives!” She shouts, trying to out run invisible butterflies.

Lepidopterophobia! Well, that’s a new one! I didn’t know Ash was scared of butterflies!

I turn and glare at my best friend, and for once Jer looks sheepish and chastised.

“I promise, they won’t hurt her…” Is all the consolation he can offer.