Chapter 1- Aelita
You know that feeling you get when you find out you’re going to die soon, even though you knew it all along? That pit in your stomach, the world spinning? No? Just me? Well, that’s what just happened. I’m sitting in a cold, white room of a doctor’s office at nine at night. The doctor is sitting across from me. This sad face, which I’m sure he puts on ten times a day, is plastered on his face as he tells me the news.
Three months.
That’s all I have left.
I situate my beanie so the long hair underneath sits perfectly behind my back. I hate it passionately, but my mother insists I wear the wig. I nod at the doctor and add “ok” where needed as he discusses what I should expect. Sleeping more in the day (I’m already just about nocturnal), confusion, restlessness, anxiety, loss in appetite, etcetera. When he finally shuts up and leaves, I also take the cue and leave. It’s well after dark, and the stars are flushed out by the lamp posts lining the road. I head back to my empty home. I live alone as I am an only child, and my parents are off somewhere doing God knows what. They have traveled since I was eight, just a few trips here and there, and as soon as I turned eighteen, they took that chance and left the house to me and left. I give them a call to tell them the news. As it rings, I think of what to say to them.
Hey, Mom. Hey, Dad. Guess what? I’m going to die soon!
Ring.
Hey, you guys! It sucks you guys left me, but guess what, you don’t have to feel guilty anymore!
Ring.
I’m going to die soon. I miss you guys. Please come home.
Ring-
“The recipient of this call can not get the phone at this time…”
Voicemail.
Beep.
“Hey guys, so uh, I just wanted to, um. I just wanted to let you know I have little time left. The doctor said I only have about three months left.”
I nervously laugh into the phone.
“So, uh, yeah. I just wanted to tell you guys that and to say goodbye. So… Good- goodbye?”
I hang up the phone and drop it like it’s on fire. Hercules, my orange tabby cat, approaches me and plops down into my lap. I lean over, grab my laptop, and open it. I open my blog and start a poll.
Hypothetically, what would you do if you only had three months to live?
A) Spend all your money on dumb things
B) Lots of charity work to get in good with God
C) Wallow
Other:________
I post the poll, and immediately, the numbers start going up. Of course, most choose B. My thousands of followers pour in their thoughts, and I watch until I get bored. I nudge the cat off my lap and set my computer on the other side of my bed. I grab the remote to the T.V. and put on my go-to show. Gilmore Girls plays in the background while I read some of the original ideas on my poll. Luke had just received a flower from Loreali when an original response catches my eye.
“I’d fulfill my dream.”
I stare at the response, and my mind whirls. I look at all the documentary posters that cover my wall. I look at my old camera and grab it. All the old videos I used to film of my parents before they left illuminate my semi-dark room. I used to want to make documentaries and dreamed of producing and directing my own. I start filming Hercules playing with a piece of lint. I move slightly to catch better angles, but it’s too dark here. I look at the time: 1:13 am. After little to no thought, I grab my grey, slightly tattered satchel, carefully place the camera into it, and head out the door.
