What is your opinion?
The mysterious eye
"The story has a good story line, i really enjoyed reading it. Of course not everything is perfect, there are little grammar mistakes. Sentence structure is at some places not really understandable. Overall the story is very good and has a good story line. I really liked it."
Book
"Good story! Full of suspense. Love the action! But, maybe be a little more fluent in your structure. Also, the part about the hoarse voice yelling doesn't really make sense. Wouldn't it whisper instead? Overall, great start!"
Good Book
"My friend told me to write this exact review so I am!"
nice job!
"nice job! You can improve a little bit with your grammar. That is only a small issue. I love this book otherwise!"
Amazing
"That was really good. Your blurb was amazing! It would be better if you used a little more descriptive words."
Good Book
"Overall, I liked your book, however, there are a few parts where you can improve on. Cover and Title- Personally, I really liked your title, however, I think you could improve on your cover. Your cover is plain and it doesn't catch the reader's attention. If I were you, I would design my own cover with more color, so that it would be catchy. Blurb- I think your blurb is good and will urge the reader to read your book. The Chapters- I think you could improve on your pacing, as it is a little bit too fast. There were also some punctuation mistakes, which if you fix, will help your book a lot. I also think you could add more detail. If you add more detail, it will also improve your pacing, so you can kill two birds with one stone. All in all, I enjoyed reading your book and encourage you to keep writing."
Good
"Good stuff.. Interesting.. mysterious"
Excellent story line
"You are a person with unimaginable creativity. When I started reading the book I couldn't stop. Honestly saying that this book is something I would love to have in my bookshelf. A few Grammer mistakes here and there. That is the only flaw this book have. It's not too severe either. This book has a lot of potential. I feel that one day this book is going to reach excellent hight"
Unique Concept
"I really liked the concept of the story, the blurb had me hooked and interested in where this story would go. Story wise it has a lot of potential and can certainly turn into a very unique novel if written with much passion, which I do believe the author has. There were some issues that I came across that made me lose the interest soon on. Please take this as constructive criticism as I truly want to help you improve. The way it was written was rushed, there were some tense switches throughout the chapter (which I am also guilty of by mistake sometimes, it's a tricky thing) and I had serious issues with the lack of description. Lack of description and having the feeling of a story being rushed can go together, so let's start with that. There were many one sentence actions. It was like reading, "then this happened, then that, now this, now that..." which doesn't read comfortably. This can be helped if more description is added and actual emotion is added to the scenes. The first chapter starts with Grace waking up, how do we know? Because we are told this. What we aren't told (or rather, shown) is where Grace's parents are in this scene. We see them talk, but where are their voices coming from? are they already downstairs? are they in her room? there is no way we can know unless we are told/shown. Example: "Happy Birthday sweetheart!!" "Thank Mom!" "Your dad and I got you something...." What I (personally) would have written: "Happy Birthday, sweetheart," my mom said gently as she sat down next to me on my bed, her weight causing the mattress to sink. Sleepily, I rubbed by eyes, blinking at her with a soft smile. "Thanks Mom." Mom patted my shoulder. "Your dad and I got something for you." She winked, standing again with an excited look in her eyes, the barely visible wrinkles around her eyes deepening as she smiled. The smallest amount of description can help with getting the feeling of the scene across, the feeling of the characters, a bit about their surroundings, an idea of their relationships and their person in general. Things can very easily feel unrelatable when there isn't much to relate to, which can lead to losing interest. The feeling I got from what you wrote was that Grace was wide awake and very excited, while a few sentences later it says she just woke up. I don't believe anyone is that excited if they were just woken up by their parents, but I could be wrong? Then with the tenses, once you start writing a story you have to be clear if you want to use past or present. If you switch throughout the story it can be distracting and lose the readers mid-sentence. I know it is hard and I still struggle with it if I don't pay attention to what I write. But the best way is to set for yourself the tense, then once the chapter or parts you've written is done you go over it to check whether you've made any tense mistakes. I think that's all I have to say. I wish you the best of luck with writing. Being a perfect writer doesn't come naturally, you have to practice and learn. I've been writing for almost 3 years now and I am still improving every day. As long as you have patience and practice a lot, ask feedback and try your best you will get there eventually. I can see you really want to improve as you already improved the prologue once you got some feedback on it, which is very good. I hope I helped you with this on your journey to better your skill. Again, I wish you the best of luck. You certainly have the imagination to come up with the right kind of stories, so don't worry about that. If my first story was as creative and unique as this one I would have been just as excited as you seem to be to write it. Keep on writing, never give up and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. You are a special gem, be strong and shine your light brightly. You're worth to be seen."
The Mysterious Eye
"Although I was drawn in by the blurb I wasn't hooked on the story after reading the prologue. As it was written in the first person I felt as if I should have felt the loss of the camera more. In order to feel this I probably needed to know more about Grace and why the camera was so important to her. I felt very little empathy with Grace, so I think a lot more back ground information on the character is needed. The story idea is good it just needs more work. Don't rush it, let it unfold slowly. Denny"
The Mysterious Eyre
"The whole idea of the story-line is really unique and kind of different from your typical, run-of-the-mill story and in all honesty, it has a lot of potential. I would definitely like to see a lot more descriptive phrasing along with a much clearer visual of what’s happening at all times instead of using such bland, and uninteresting wording that ultimately, throws off the entire reading process. I would also like to see a lot better flow through the scene changes, conversations, and overall momentum that would make the story much more enjoyable to read along with developing your writing style much better. But otherwise, the plot or idea you have for this story is spot-on. : )"
The Mysterious Eye
"Title: The Mysterious Eye At first, I discovered this book in a group and read the blurb. Before I dive into discussing the blurb, I would review the title and cover. As a reader, those are the two things which you see in a book. Many would say it’s the blurb/synopsis but when a book is on a shelf in a library or bookstore, the reader spots it because of the cover and title. The cover is extremely simple and there could be some improvement in design. I do understand that there are writers who want a specific look and they design their covers accordingly; I respect that. In altering the design to enhance the visual features, the cover should hint what the story is about. Using excerpts on the book also helps the reader to be intrigued after the first stage of spotting the book…the reader goes to the second stage of taking up the book to investigate. However, the title is visible and the picture used is not blurry which is good. As far as the title goes, “The Mysterious Eye”, from reading the blurb at first I would take a moment to make the connection between the title, the camera and the storyline. However, it is a fetching title and I personally quite like it. Blurb The story is amazing. As a reader, I sense the mystery and adventure. As a writer, I would alter a few things to enhance the beauty of this story. By taking off some information and adding a scene from the story, hinting at what is yet to come but also leaving room for the reader’s anxiety to read further, it will completely change the reaction from the approaching reader. As I have said before, this story is amazing but tweaking it a little can do wonders! Chapters After reading the blurb, I was interested in seeing what was there next? What was so special about this camera? Let’s investigate! In my opinion, the prologue should have provided the reader with background information about the story before explaining when and where it all started. Describe the character, including information about her life, family, thoughts and little details which matters for the reader to understand the character. The vocabulary used was average, as a reader, I would want more description. Writing in the view of the character herself, I think she should have been more expressive. It almost feels as if she’s recording a daily journal. Start by describing the night, the street she was walking down and so forth. Emphasize on her emotions by incorporating the noises heard and what was seen. It will enhance the reading aspect. It allows the reader to imagine herself/himself as the character. Voicing the character’s thoughts also adds to the effect. Spelling and grammar; there were no noticeable spelling errors, however, the paragraphs are too long and can be broken down. There is too much information which can be taken off and more description can be written in. There were a few grammar errors as well. In conclusion, this is an amazing story which has yet to be written. I have only reviewed the blurb and prologue. As I always say to all writers, there is always room for improvement and you can never stop gaining knowledge. Keep working on those amazing thoughts, ideas and keep editing as you go along. It was a delight reading reviewing this book!"
