cigarettes after sex

Thursday's were always busy at the studio. People swarmed around the studio looking at the art displays around the dark room.

It was always the same people that came in.

The people with money who believed they had a chance at art. The people who were in it for the money.

I was a firm believer in the 'quality over quantity' saying. I painted and created with a soulful purpose. I was selfish when it came to art, it was something that came from my experiences, my feelings, my thoughts.

I don't ever remember a time when I didn't have art, writing, and books to keep me sane. They were always there. I always had a piece of paper and a pen. I always had to release my thoughts. Always had a way to do it too.

I came to the studio every Friday after my afternoon shift in the library. I helped teach part-time five days a week for third graders. I got to do everything I loved. I taught, created, read, and was able to have fun while doing it.

When it came to money I came by. I had my ways and was fine with it. I shared an apartment with my best friend from high-school. And was doing fine financially.

With a glass of champagne in my right hand and my left above my chest, I easily found myself lost in the sound of small talk. The studio was beautiful tonight. The black walls and velvet curtain contrasted well with the different colors around the room. The ceiling lights dim and the night sky clear.

A hand touched my shoulder grabbing my attention. "Beautiful isn't it?" the male voice spoke softly.

"What is?"

"The true beauties in life are always right in front of you. And it's only when you lose it, you realize just how beautiful it was."

"What have you lost?" I ask, my curiosity getting the best of me.

"Only everything I've ever loved."

His answer took me by surprise. It wasn't every night someone like this, someone with such a tainted soul, approach you. I turned to finally face him, but he was gone. I brushed my hand against my dress flattening the invisible wrinkles. I wasn't sure if anyone had really even spoken to me, but when I felt the slight burn of where his fingertips had been, I knew it was real.

The night passed pretty quickly and I soon found myself leaving the doors of the studio. My boot-clad feet made clicks as I walked down the pavement. The streets filled with yells and sirens. The sound of a bell to the bodegas door caught Tony's attention. I hadn't seen him in months as he was off studying in school.

"Mira quien es!" (look who it is!) his loud voice causing the customers to look.

"Hi, Tony. Did you miss me?" I smiled cheekily.

"Nah, why would I miss your cute ass?" he chuckled.

"I don't know. Maybe you happen to like this cute ass." A light-hearted laugh escaped my lips as I walked away getting my necessities. I came here almost every night for some grocery shopping. I got drinks and snacks that would probably last Isla and I the week. I paid and thanked Tony before walking out into the streets again.

I fumbled with my keys as I opened the door to my small apartment. Isla, my roommate, wasn't coming home until later. I put the groceries away and sat down on the couch debating on what to do. I figured Isla would be hungry when she arrived so I decided to wait before ordering take-out.

I went out to the fire escape, something I always did, and lit a cigarette. The bitter smoke left my chapped lips in an exhale. I was stressed and I knew that by the end of cigarette reality would settle in.

By my third cigarette, I headed in to do god knows what. I contemplated going out for a walk but realized I would just go smoking again. So, I boiled some water and fixed myself some tea. I always added a little splash of milk to my earl- grey tea.

But before I settled down, I went to feed our cat Salma and lied on the couch.

The warm liquid was enough to satisfy my hunger for a bit. Isla came shortly after a few chapters of the book I was reading. "Hey, Des. Sorry, were you waiting up for me?" she asked as she put the paper bags down on the table.

Isla was pretty. She had short blond hair that reached just below her ears. She also had a galaxy of freckles splattered over her tinted rose cheeks and a smile that was as contagious as a cold. Out of the both of us, she was the more positive one. She worked for a little company in Manhattan and was incredibly intelligent and ambitious.

"No, it's fine. It was long enough to catch up on some reading I'd been meaning to do," I stood up and helped with the bags. "How was work? D' you get the promotion? I swear that bitch has it coming for you."

Isla would come every day after work and complain that her boss hated her. It was true, she made it her priority to make Isla suffer. I witnessed it myself.

"No, it fucking sucks. On top of that, I think Lincoln's cheating. God, Desiree, is it ever gonna get better." she sighed frustratedly and raked a hand through her hair, pulling at the roots.

"Isla," I said in a stern tone. "Fuck 'em. Fuck them both. How about we order Chinese and watch a movie, huh?" I said in hopes of cheering her up. It had been a success because the next thing she does is take out wine glasses and serves us a generous amount.

"Dessy, I don't think I'd make it if it weren't for you," she smiled brightly. "God knows what I'd do."

We both giggled and sipped on our wine. We ordered Chinese and watched a movie until the overwhelming feeling of sleep took over my body.

The next morning I woke up bright and early for school. I looked out my window and my eyes watch the city, it was the city that never slept, it was a city filled with hopes and dreams.

Dressed in a black top and a suede corduroy buttoned skirt with a pair of knee-high boots. I made my way towards the kitchen a made myself some coffee making sure to leave Isla some alongside some aspirin. She was a helpless light-weight, that girl. I grabbed my bags and headed out into the streets.

The day was slightly chilly, the wind wrapping itself around my limbs. I went to my usual study and right after went to help the kids.

"Miss. Desiree! Miss. Desiree!" the kids cheered. I watched as their little feet ran towards me. They engulfed me in a hug and I giggled.

"Hey, kids! Where's Mrs. Wilkes?" I asked making my way towards her desk. I settled my things and attended to the kids. I brought them snacks and the class went by briefly.

By the end of the day, I found myself at a stool at a bar. The bar was fairly packed and I had a light beer. I was supposed to meet a friend from work. When I spotted him at the door I stood. He waved sweetly and swiftly sat next to me. His knee brushed against mine in the process. We chatted as old friends did. When I left my body was tired and I had sobered up.

Opening the doors to my apartment I found Isla's body sprawled on the carpet with her feet up in the air. "I'm home," I sing out. I stand right above her, towering over her. My figure in a dramatic pose I say, "Honey, did you miss me?"

She laughs and throws a pillow near her. "Shut the fuck up, you weirdo." she suddenly moves on her toes and screams. "I totally forgot to tell you! I got the promotion! I fucking got it!" She squealed. My arms wrapped around her as we screamed in excitement, surely the neighbor wouldn't complain.

"Well? What are you waiting for, Dessie?" she asked, grasping my hand and dragging me to her bedroom.

"What do you mean?" I ask confusedly.

"We have to celebrate. The girls asked to go for a drink. It's been a while since we actually gone out. Do it for me." She pleaded.

"Fine." I gave in. "I'll go, but only because you'll be washing the dishes for the rest of the week," I smirked as a waltzed out of her room, ignoring the surprised look on her face.

I got dressed in a nude Herve Leger body-con dress and some nude heels. I curled my long brown hair and did my makeup to add a pop of color. I remember senior year, partying and drinking most nights. By the time I was ready, Isla was heading out the door with a cigarette in her hand.

"Ready?" She smiled.

"I suppose." I smiled just as brightly.

"We're going to paint the city red!"