The Day Lucifer Forgot His Wife's Birthday

One day in the deepest part of Hell, Lucifer Langslion was in the living room and he was busy watching a movie on T.V. by himself. His seven daughters were out shopping at the mall with Lucifer's gay cousin Levi while Princess, Lucifer's wife, was in the kitchen and was busy baking a cake for Lucifer. He decided to take a short break to go playfully bother Princess and so he went into the kitchen to find her there with her back turned to him in front of the oven, which was open, and she hadn't heard him come in. Lucifer put his hands on Princess's slender hips as she stood up from her bent over position. She slightly jumped and almost dropped the baked cake that she was holding, but she quickly set the pan down on the counter by the sink.

"Did I scare you, Babe?" asked Lucifer with a sexy grin and chuckle as Princess turned around to face him. She said,

"Yes. And, you had also almost made me drop the cake that I had baked. Don't go sneaking up on me like that again, all right?" Lucifer nodded and gave Princess a kiss on the lips that made her want to melt and she kissed him back for a good four minutes until she pulled herself away and Lucifer asked,

"Is that cake you took out of the oven for me by any chance?" Princess said,

"Yes. And, I don't want you going anywhere near it until it cools down and also because I have to get some frosting on it first. Better yet, don't go near it all until after dinner." Lucifer pouted a sexy pout and gave Princess his best Oh-come-on look. It almost worked on her, but she changed her mind at the very last second and shook her head so Lucifer decided that he was going to change her mind back. He leaned her up against the front of the fridge and put a hand up her dark pink short skirt, went inside of her panties, and began to slowly use two fingers to play with her pussy as he sensually kissed her on the left side of her neck. Princess started to push Lucifer away, but then she thought to herself that maybe she would let him try and persuade her to let him have his cake early if he did a good job on her. So, she put one of her hands on his back and the other one behind his head, slowly ran her fingers through his midnight black hair, and moaned loud enough for him to hear her. Lucifer kissed Princess again and put his tongue inside of her mouth so that he could suck on and play with hers. She responded back to him, got his pants undone, reached inside, and then pulled out his 9 1/2 inch cock to start giving Lucifer a slow handjob. Just then, Hitler walked into the kitchen to get himself a snack and saw what was going on. Princess looked up over Lucifer's right shoulder, saw Hitler, and then she let out a scream! Lucifer jumped and said as he put his cock back in his pants and zipped them up,

"Hitler! What the fuck?! Didn't your mother ever teach you how to knock before entering a damn room, you fucking numbnuts?!" Hitler bowed from the waist and said,

"I am zo sorry! It won't happen again, I promise!" Princess pulled her skirt back down and tried to get her breathing regulated again as she calmed back down. She said,

"What are you doing in here anyway? I thought you, Levi and José were playing a game of Darts in your room?" Hitler said,

"I vas, but zen I got hungry and dezided to get me zomething to eat. I did not know zat you and his Evilness were in here getting it on." Lucifer cleared his throat and said,

"Well, next time just remember what I said about knocking before entering a room, okay?"

"Yes, Your Evilness. I will." said Hitler. Lucifer left the kitchen to go back in the living room and finish watching the movie that he had starting watching earlier. Just as he sat down on the sofa, the phone rang so he had to get back up to answer it. He went over to where the phone was hanging on the far left wall in the living room, picked up the receiver and said,

"Hello, you've reached the Langslion residence. This is Lucifer speaking. Who, may I ask, am I conversing with, if you please?" An elderly voice answered back,

"Hello, Lucifer. It's your mother. How are you doing, Dear?" He smiled and said,

"Pretty good for my age. Yourself?"

"I'm doing quite well for a old woman at the age of fifty. How's my favorite daughter-in-law doing and is she busy?" said Lucille.

"Princess is doing great. She's in the kitchen putting some frosting on a cake that she had made for me. Might I ask why you're calling?"

"That was very nice that she did that, Dear. And to answer your question, the reason for my call was that because I hoped you had remembered that she's celebrating her birthday today. Did you or didn't you?" Lucifer sucked in a sharp intake of breath as he cursed and smacked his forehead at the same time. He said,

"Oh, my fucking God! That's today?! Shit fucking pickle in a holy motherfucking handbasket!" He heard Lucille gasp and say to him,

"Lucifer M. S. Langslion! How many times have I told you to not curse whenever you're on the phone with me, young man?"

"I'm terribly sorry, Mother! Geez, it's just that I had gone and completely forgot that it was Princess's birthday today!"

"Tsk, tsk. I do hope that you as least got something for her, Lucifer."

"No, I didn't! Jesus Bloody Christ! What in the fucking... I mean... What the holy hell am I'm gonna do, Mother?! I'll be in the damn doghouse with Princess if I don't think of something fast! Can you help me out?" Lucifer didn't hear Lucille on the other end of the line and so he cleared his throat and said,

"Uh.. Mother? Are you still there? Hello?"

"Yes, I'm still here, Lucifer. And, you want to know something? It seems that every single time that you have a problem, I'm always there to bail you out of some sort of trouble that you always seem to get yourself into. Am I right, Son?" Lucifer didn't say anything back and so Lucille went on to say to him,

"Look here, Lucifer. I know that I'm usually the one that gets you out of your little predicaments, but I'm going to do the right thing this time. I'm standing back and letting you figure out this one on your own because I'm not stepping in, and I'm not saving you. I'm letting you figure out for yourself on how to dig out of this hole that you've made without any of my help." Lucifer was now in a state of panic. He didn't have a clue on how to get himself out of this problem that he was in. He thought to himself, "Hmm... I could always tell Princess that I had gotten her a gift and then go out and get one for her. But, wait a fucking minute. If I try to do go and do that, she might go and start asking questions on where I'm going. Shit! Goddammit, I'm so royally fucking fucked it's not even funny! Motherfucking hell! I have to think of something, I just fucking have to!" He cleared his throat and said out loud to Lucille in a pleading tone,

"Awww, Mother, please? Couldn't you help me get out of this? I'd really appreciate it and be forever grateful." To Lucifer's disappointment, Lucille said,

"I'm sorry, Lucifer, but this is your own kettle of fish that you're going to have to fry for yourself. I'm going to have to go now because your father is wanting me to fix him some lunch. I love you and good luck!" And with that, Lucille hung up the phone on her end and that's when Lucifer hung up as well, sighed a sigh of frustration as he sat back down on the sofa, and then started to think on how he was going to get a present for Princess that he had unintentionally forgotten about. Just then, he heard his daughters return back from the mall with Levi. Lucillia walked into the living room and she went over to her father, gave him a big hug and said,

"Hey there, Daddy. How are you doing?" Lucifer returned the hug and said,

"I'm in some deep trouble that I seriously need to get out of, Sweetie. You think that you could maybe help me out?" Lucillia sat next to Lucifer while the rest of her sisters and Levi left the room to put their things that they had bought at the mall away. When they had all left the room, Lucillia asked Lucifer,

"Okay, Daddy. What kind of deep trouble are you in? How serious is it?" Lucifer took a deep breath and let it out before saying,

"I forgot that it was your Mother's birthday today and I need someone to help get me out of this fucking jam that I'm in." Lucillia's mouth dropped open and she said,

"You forgot Mom's birthday?! Holy shit, Daddy! She's gonna have your ass for fucking dinner if she finds out that you forgot!" Lucifer raised his eyebrows in shock as he said,

"Lucillia Ann Marie Langslion! You watch your language, young lady! You're not allowed to curse until your 18! You have two more years left before you can start doing that!" Lucillia blushed and said,

"Oops, sorry about that, Daddy! Like I was saying, Mom's going to chew you out big time! I would love to help you out and you know wholeheartedly that I would without any question, but I have other things that I have to do." Lucifer crossed his arms over his chest and said,

"Oh, really? Like what?" Lucillia was about to answer him, but the phone rang again and saved her from saying anything. She went to go answer it and found out that it was one of her many crushes that she had. Rick was his name and he was 18 years old. He and Lucillia stayed on the phone for over 2 hours and so Lucifer didn't get the help that he needed from her. He decided to go out for a drive to clear his head and so he went to his cherry-red Dodge Viper that was parked in the garage, got in and used his car keys to start it up, and then he drove off.